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New teenage daughter to our family

Danielle Zaha
3 years ago

My husband and I have been together for 19 years and we have a 16 year old son and 12 year old daughter. My husband recently found out that he has a 16 year old daughter with another woman. We discussed this and I have come to terms and excepted that it happened, please no judgment. We live in Ohio while she lives in Missouri. I set up us meeting in Missouri and we invited her to come stay with us for her spring break. She ended up being able to stay with us for 2 weeks and by the end I was sad yet excited to have her leave. While she was with us my husband acted different, everything was all about her, and he stated that he was trying to make up for lost time. I attempted to bond with her and do things as a family and most of my attempts were meet with complaints or the new daughter and my husband together and the other 2 children with me. I felt, based on her actions, that she was not interested in having new sibling or a step mom and was only willing to spend time with her dad. This hurt my feeling immensely. I put a lot of time and energy into making her a picture book, getting us to meet in Illinois, getting her to Missouri and than I felt left out of everything. After she left I asked my husband to have a group text with her, in a way to attempt to build a family bond, and he refused because it isn't personable. Now when I text her she might answer back but it is usually with one or two words. She seems to text him regularly. The other children haven't heard from her or reached out to her since she left. I am wondering how to make her a part of our family and not just have her be his daughter. Any advice?

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