Who would you like to get caught in an elevator with??
7 years ago
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- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
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Would you leave if you caught him cheating?
Comments (49)I'd kick him out. I was cheated on before (while in a very serious relationship) and while I'm 'over it', I still have scars. It takes a very long time to get over and I'm not sure I could ever really trust the man anymore. Part of not cheating is being self-aware. Many people have no self-awareness. Meaning, they don't watch what they say with other people and they don't watch what they give to other people. If you're married, you HAVE to work HARD at keeping the emotional energy IN THE MARRIAGE. None of this complaining about your spouse to some other woman - that's marriage suicide. It almost always leads to an affair because suddenly there's this understanding ear that lets you gripe and pretend all of the problems in the marriage are your spouse's fault (all marriages go through rough patches - that's why I HATE the 'the marriage/relationship was in trouble' excuse for another person to feel justified in interloping). Anyway - that's why it's so important to be self-aware. You have to register in your mind when you're feeling upset, vulnerable, whatever - so you don't put yourself in situations that may tempt you to cheat. One poster above mentioned being in situations where even the best men would be hard-pressed NOT to cheat - I say that if you're really one of the best men, you'll do everything possible to stay OUT of those situations. Anyone swimming in shark-infested waters is bound to get bitten. Cheating isn't a mistake - it's a choice - no matter how a person attempts to rationalize it. It was a choice to 'make friends' with another person who isn't your spouse and give them emotional energy - to gripe with them and take their sympathy. It's a choice to put yourself in close situations with that person. It's a choice to feed your 'crush' for that person. It's a choice to then cheat with that person. None of that 'it just happened' tripe... it only 'just happens' if you magically trip and fall on her and on the way down, your pants magically unzip and ... well, you know the rest, lol. Infidelity is a choice, period. To me, that's a dealbreaker. I'd make certain that any man I married knew it upfront. I've been through it once - no way I'd tolerate it again. He'd be outta there - just as I would expect to be if I cheated (which I can say with 100% certainty that I NEVER would)....See MoreGetting caught up
Comments (8)I wish I could get my dear one to realize that working with me on some scut project is actually a nice kind of togetherness. I too spent Sunday getting caught up, but solo--the kids' room needed deep cleaning--vacuum, dust, wipe it ALL down w/ a wet microfiber cloth. I only made it through their room, and I worked steadily all afternoon and evening. But that room is CLEAN! It was getting gritty and sticky, I'm sort of embarrassed to say. Glad you had a nice day! (Oh, and mine qualified as "totally wonderful" bcs I also folded all the laundry--and I do mean "all"--DH had done tons of wash in the morning)...See MoreI am a stepmom who would like to be Mom and not just a caretaker
Comments (14)You need to step back and look at the whole situation. Your H would like nothing more than for his child to have a good, caring mother like you, but the situation is quite sensitive and has so much ramifications from a wrong move. your H probably is quite sensitive when dealing w his xw and does not want to stir the pot up too much. Your presence at the Teacher Parent conference would infer that this is YOUR child, and implies that the other mom does not exist. My daughter while in highschool, did not want my wife, her SM, to come to watch her soccer game. I knew it hurt my wife's feeling but we had to respect that. Bonding and relationship take times and history together to develop. Now as she is in college and mature some more, my daughter's attitude toward the SM has improved quite a bit. Had my wife forcefully pushed her way into my children's life (though their BM had died), our family relationship would explode to the point of no return. Guess what, I love my wife but I will not tear my own children's life apart for her own ego to be that "perfect step mom". several years prior to my 2nd marriage, I had dated this beautiful woman who thought my children would love her INSTANTLY because she was simply a nice person and when they did not, she got angry and called them b*tches. That woman then asked me to leave ALL my assets, including those of my 1st wife to her, again because she thought she was a nice person. I left that "nice" woman shortly after that. You seem to have a very generous and good heart, please keep that up. Don't let these little things and bumps in your blended family affect who you really are. Love asks nothing in return. Anger and revenge do not dissolve hatred and discord, but love can. Use your love to dissolve hatred and anger out there. You love your ss just like you love any other god's creatures. Just be patient, take a little step along the way. Lower your expectations, then everything you get is BONUS. Hopefully, one day you will have children of your own and then you can experience FULLY as a BIO MOM....See MoreWho Would you like to see on Dancing?
Comments (18)Good thread! How about old teen idols? David Cassidy & Donnie Osmond or Bobby Sherman, Davy Jones. Terri Bradshaw would be a hoot! As far as women go, maybe the oldest girl on Full House (can't think or her name)and for that matter how about her real life brother that was on Growing Pain, Kirk Cameron. Victoria Principal?? Can't think of many women right now. Since the writers strike is going on in Hollywood, how about the James Denton from Desparate Housewives or McDreamy from Grey's Anatomy? Doesn't hurt to have a little eye candy! HA! I'm sure we could sit here all day thinking of good ones....See More- 7 years ago
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skibby (zone 4 Vermont)