I totally get it. Seems like 10pm is a reasonable time for neighborhood noise to stop. We get up early and are usually in bed by 10, so it would irritate me, too. Maybe you should look into noise ordinances for your area. I'm not sure they cover basketball bouncing, but it's worth a check.

Across the street from is an apt bldg and one apartment which faces my bedroom have people over regularly.

They don't smoke in the unit so there are people out on the balcony talking loud while drinking and smoking. They may not realize how much their voices carry at night but it's loud and I can't sleep. This usually goes on after 1 a.m. They've even had people thru the week, again till late.

There was a by-law officer at my girlfriend's place looking at concerns with her neighbour's fence. I told him about the noise, and he said contrary to public belief there is no restraint on time, on noise, on private property. Large functions like ball games, outdoor festivals etc are usually 11 pm but not on personal parties.

If it does get overy loud and obnoxious I have to call the cops and an official complaint is filed. then they call the by-law officer.

There are three of those basketball nets on a stand right down the street from me.I don’t care if the kids play for an hour or so but that constant bouncing for hours can drive you nuts. I don’t think the right of kids to play loudly supersedes the right for peace and quiet. Let them ride bikes!

Sounds like your in the right to complain and ......the kids will grow up and move away eventually.....

(Years ago) a new neighbor moved in. The man played music outside, loud. Loud enough for him to hear while he was mowing the lawn on his riding mower. The forever hero of my heart is the little 3 year old girl from a couple houses down who ran YELLING at him to TURN THAT MUSIC DOWN!!!

LOL he was good after that.

secsteve, by any chance does your community have a homeowners association? This is a time that having one would help. 10 pm is too late. If the parents continue to be flippant about your reasonable requests, I'd think about maybe even calling the police to report a noise disturbance the next time it happens at a late hour.

I hope it gets resolved.

We love these. No, you shouldn't have to buy one, but they work. They are much better than a fan or one of the ones that do the thunderstorm or waterfall.

https://www.amazon.com/Marpac-Classic-White-Noise-Machine/dp/B00HD0ELFK/ref=sr_1_4?crid=KJJ5JB8ZRMLM&keywords=sound%2Bmachine&qid=1558974788&s=gateway&sprefix=sound%2B%2Caps%2C152&sr=8-4&th=1

I get it. When we moved here, we wanted to be in this community to raise our family. I recall moving into our home and there were a few capri sun straw wrappers and a random tennis ball in our yard that my husband complained about under his breath. My thoughts were, "Well, what did we expect? We moved into a neighborhood with kids." and then my next thought was, "At least it's not hypodermic needles and condo (add an "m" to the end of that word) laying around." That sounds curt and extreme, I know, but we really had to come to accept that with the sense of security we have in our neighborhood, will come a few sacrifices.

Here, kids may be outside in nice weather until midnight on weekends, and perhaps 9 or 10 on school nights. During summer break, it can be later.

Secsteve, I'm not excusing the actions of your neighbor especially since she's aware that the noise bothers you. I believe, though, from her perspective, she may be grateful that, at that age, her kids are home and having fun under her watchful eye. Those are the ages when kids can take a turn and start getting into serious trouble.

Those years are behind me, thank goodness. But I remember the angst and worry, knowing that around the corner could be much worse scenarios.

Still, I think talking with her would help. And doing so during the day or one evening when you're both outside, etc., and not when noise is being heard and she's on the defensive.

I think it depends on how often it happens and what day of the week it is. If it’s a Friday, Saturday or 3 day holiday, I kind of think you’re being a bit grumpy. (And I suspect that you might too). But, if it’s a work night, I’m with you, it’s not unreasonable. That doesn’t mean when fireworks are still going at 11 & 12 on a Saturday night or the family gathering down the street is still really loud, I’m not bothered, because I am but would I call to complain? No. I think when you choose to live in a neighborhood, it’s all about give and take and being able to have some tolerance for others. If you have neighbors who occasionally put consideration of others to the way side, but are otherwise good neighbors, then you need to lighten up, but if the issue happens ALL THE FREAKING TIME, like a barking dog night after night, well that’s a different story. I’m sure that Mom is just happy that her son is hanging out at home with his friends and not off looking for trouble.

Places were I lived had noise orrdances from a time at night to a time in the morning. But, are not enforced except for extreme noise like barking dogs, loud music, lawn mowing, etc. Not for people talking, or kids playing. People have to take into consideration where they chose to live and the frequency of the noise . If you chose to live near a playground, apartments or homes close together, etc you have to expect noise. Also if it happens every night or only a few times a month. In the case of the OPs basketball noise I would of just closed the windows and turned on the air.

Hi nickel,

I assume that he wasn't wearing those big ear-muffy looking things that farmers, large lawn mower and other equipment operators use ...

... to preserve their long-term capacity to avoid the need to use that "Would you repeat that, please -- I couldn't hear what you said well enough for the message to survive the travel from the outer edge of the ear through to the brain well enough for me to gather enough of the message to understand it".

ole joyful

I wish, when I was raising my sons, that I had a more informed view of sports. After becoming older and a little bit wiser, I realize the value. Kids learn rules, sportsmanship, etc from playing these games.

But there is also a more palpable reward. While they are thunking basketballs at home in their driveway, they are not elsewhere engaging in less wholesome activities. As an example, currently in my neighborhood there is apparently a local 'game' causing some distress to homeowners. One pack of kids gets in a car and drives down the street, the other pack runs through the homeowner's back yards, vaulting fences and dodging dogs and they see who can get to the end of the street first.

I do totally sympathize with the OP and his sleep difficulties, however.

That is why I support talking to the neighbors, but be proactive on your own. The Marpac Sound Machines work and work well.

ETA: Kids should be inside and in bed or at least taking a bath and getting ready for bed at 10PM anyway. It wouldn't hurt them at all to learn how to be good citizens and not snowflakes.

The lesson of your "rights" end where mine begin is no longer taught. The idea that children are told when to go to bed is no longer a thing. The idea that a child can't do what they want when the FEEL LIKE it is no longer a thing. Sorry, but alas this is the world we live in.

it all starts and ends with the parents.

find out about time noise ordinance in your area. Here its 11:00 pm

if it happens all the time, then i would be annoyed. if its once in awhile, then just let it go., life is too short and the kids will outgrow it soon enough. around here that sort of activity is seasonal, so we do get some time 'off'. we have private pools around here, so lots of parties, late nights etc... we are ok with it as long as it eases up by midnight as it usually does, so we are lucky :)

Those who think you can just close your windows to the sounds of basketball have probably never heard thump thump thump CLANG! for hours on end in the street outside your home. It's much different than the sound of children's voices at play or a lawn mower.

"Kids should be inside and in bed or at least taking a bath and getting ready for bed at 10PM anyway"

Teenagers don't "take a bath" and get ready for bed by 10pm. If you have/had teenagers and this is what they were required to do, don't be surprised to know that many didn't follow the same path. They need to be reminded to be polite and considerate but treating them like little children is usually not effective or well received.

I absolutely hear where you are coming from.

Side story: We used to have a weekend home. It was on a very large creek (lake-like) with homes close together with connecting docks. When we bought the house, one neighbor was very old and did not come out, and the other side for whatever reason going got occasional use.

Fast forward, one side sold to an older couple, who would live there full time. They had kids and grandkids in the area. They were for the most part respectful.

It was when the other side was sold to a family with young children. They not only came with their kids, but the anther family. (Sister of the wife)

They were loud, came onto our dock because they preferred sun rather than shade etc. Had other company come where they had to set up tents to accommodate the crowd! We wound up selling this house to them (3x the price we bought it for) only for them to tear it down for more yard space.

Their lifestyle trumped ours. There was no getting around it. They were a lot of people in a small area, they certainly weren't going to whisper.

But.....getting back to you. I think if I KNEW the ball playing would stop at 10PM I would be fine with it. It's the not knowing how long it will continue that would bother me.

It's hard to be an older person a neighborhood that is turning younger.

At our primary home, there is a turn over to younger families going on. We had one neighbor, thank goodness they moved that would shout encouragement to the kids as if they were all star ball players. He was worse than hearing the shouts from the kids! It would go on for hours! We didn't say anything and we were lucky that they moved.

It is hard when neighbors have different lifestyles.

The other reason I feel the way I do above, is because there also may come a time when I’m doing something that disturbs them and when that happens, I’d want the same tolerance or consideration.

arcy, I "liked" your post but only because I agree with what you said. ; )

I have neighbors who turn up their boom box or radio outside so loud it vibrates. This is usually on weekends. The only time I can go sit in the orchard in peace is during the week when they are at work. In fact, just awhile ago I got tired of the rap and country western music, even tho I moved up closer to the house, and came inside. I thought it would lessen after their kids grew up and left the house, but it's the mother and her many boy friends who are to blame. ha

"Kids should be inside and in bed or at least taking a bath and getting ready for bed at 10PM anyway"

Teenagers don't "take a bath" and get ready for bed by 10pm. If you have/had teenagers and this is what they were required to do, don't be surprised to know that many didn't follow the same path. They need to be reminded to be polite and considerate but treating them like little children is usually not effective or well received.

That is why they are kids and you are the parents/grandparents. They need to learn how to be good citizens. It is not their choice. It is yours.

How many kids did you successfully raise this way, telling teenagers to have a bath and be in bed by 10pm?

Six.

ETA: Why do you not think that the adults should be in charge? You are going to be bossed by a child?

You are an idiot.

Giving a kid the freedom to assess alternatives and learn to make good choices is not allowing the kid to be in charge. It's practice for taking the same approach with more important things when adulthood comes. Raising kids is preparing them for success in adulthood, not for life as a private in the Marine Corps or as an inmate in a prison, where independence of thought and action aren't allowed.

There's not just one way to do these things but I suspect what may have been a heavy handed approach may not have been followed by many others you know, unless that's what's common in your area or among people you know. It's not common where I am.

I'm so sorry for you and your neighbors and the people that have to deal with your snowflakes.

You think that is is fine for your snowflakes to keep everyone else up just because they want too.

No snowflakes in our house, but no robots either. They learned to think for themselves and that choices for actions have consequences. Thanks for the compliment. I'm going to guess that the adults in your house had severe parents too and that was the only approach you knew. Too bad if so or even worse if you chose that approach without thinking through the consequences yourself.

Our small city has an 11 p.m. noise ordinance that applies to parties, noisy dogs, etc. The police give one courtesy call (in person) and can follow up with a ticket with a sizable fine.

We also have an ordinance that regulates outdoor lighting. It's very detailed as to brightness where the light falls -- like in your windows, Jasdip!

I don't think it's "severe" parenting to expect even teens to have a bedtime. It's also not unreasonable. Even the most demanding high school on earth, does not require a teen to still be doing homework at 2AM. If they are, they need some help with their time-management skills.

We all need a "bedtime" in order to get enough sleep to be able to function at work or school the next day. It has nothing to do with "independence of thought". It has much to do with self-discipline which parents must teach by setting limits until the child can set them for himself, typically senior year in HS.

Our neighbors shut the noise down by 11...we're ok with that...we go to bed earlier, but it's infrequent that they party that late. It's easier now that their kids are older....nothing carries across the night air like the noise of children screaming.

I don't think kids playing in their own yards on weekends or summer at ten pm makes them entitled or their parents snowflakes. When I was young and also when my kids were young they had a ball catching lightning bugs pr playing tag in the moonlight. Even when they were teens they could swim in the pool at night. They knew though no screaming and when teens they had to be in the house when we went to bed. They could of been doing stuff a lot worse than just playing.

When we moved into our previous neighborhood we had no idea that there were 4 teen boys in the house directly behind us. We soon found out however- our first night in our new home they started playing basketball on the patio in their back yard complete with spot lights on the house that were aimed onto their hoop - and of course also directly into our family room.

There were times I thought that constant thump-thump of the ball on the concrete patio and then the rebound off the backboard would drive me nuts. My bedroom was in the rear of the house and we couldn't even open our windows on a nice night.

DH didn't want to say anything because we were new and he didn't want to cause any problems. But I was miserable. Finally when school started in September the week night games stopped and it was only on weekends that we had to listen to it. Once the oldest got a car things became much quieter.

The mother sounds hopeless. Can you talk to the kids? They may be a little bit more adult than their parent.

Schools out for summer. A 10 pm bedtime doesn't happen during the school year. We know a lot of kids who work really hard and are over achievers. They don't get home from school until 7 or 8 pm or later some nights because of after school activities. Sometimes they come home and sleep for a while and get up and do homework. Some nights they are up to 2 or 3 am writing papers. I don't know of any that go to bed at 10 pm unless they have a 5 am track practice.

I would want the neighbors on my side and wouldn't make them mad. If the noise was that bad for me, I'd probably go sleep in another bedroom rather than bother them. I'd fix up the guest room to be comfortable if you haven't already.

We have many basketballs bouncing in our driveway. I have asked neighbors on both sides, to please let me know if there are more/less inconvenient times when they'd prefer not to hear it. I'd accommodate reasonable requests, if they ever made any. I don't let our kids play in the driveway past 9 or so, just because I think that's unfair, despite the neighbors having never complained.

The purpose of basketball hoops is to bounce the ball and shoot the ball. On many, many streets and culdesacs all around us, there are almost as many hoops as homes. So, I don't see how to avoid it much, except that when you go looking for a home to purchase, shop elsewhere if you see a bunch of hoops nearby!

But I agree with others that it's temporary, seasonal, and the kids grow up. So here's what I'd do, if I were bothered so much. I'd consider meeting the family. I'd take them a pie or something, and tell them about some connection with sports that I remembered, and I'd ask them about the kids' sport. Do they play for a school? Do they have a club team? Perhaps understanding what they're doing might make a smoother acquaintance-ship. In sharing this, perhaps you share that you were once a kid, and wished you had a better jump shot, etc.

For me, the key is a balanced relationship/acquaintanceship, where instead of being the grumpy guy who only communicates when you have a complaint, perhaps you are the guy who offers to bring in their mail and keep an eye on their house when they're out of town, and waves when you see them, and asks the kids how their basketball season's going and did they make the high school team? When they're a bit invested in YOU, they are more likely to care about your needs as well.

Ear plugs...