Curiosity about our bodies is perfectly normal for 4 year olds. I would not make a big deal out of it.

I would be more concerned that 2 four year olds had that much time (without supervision) that they were able to strip down without a parent noticing the quiet.

My advise would be that kids that age should play within earshot of an adult.

No it is not part of the cognitive/social/emotional maturation of a four year old to, without prompting, request of another child 'lets see your booty'. We live in a HIGHLY sexualized world. I would assume the friend is allowed to watch programs of an adult nature. It is typical for young children when trying to grasp something confusing or unknown they experienced or saw, to play it out. The question for your daughter is does she want the friend to continue to introduce nudity, touching, exploration to your grand daughter? That will be part of this friends 'play' and it will only ramp up not diminish. To demonize the interaction would only heighten your grandchild's experience. It is a pickle. If your daughter sees concern she might try a discussion about modesty/privacy/sanitary and what parts of our body remain private with her daughter. That along with closer public supervision when the two girls play could take care of it. Open doors, play rooms vs bedrooms naturally control what most people instinctively know is crossing boundaries.

I wouldn't have even thought little kids would even know the word 'booty' unless it's mentioned regularly in the household.

Besides closer supervision, checking in kids more often, I think it's time the parent starts talking with/reminding their kids about that type of play/curiosity. You really don't know where it's coming from...just curious kids or a kid who is/has been asked to show their booty by someone else. You can never be too careful. I had this happen with my daughter...later came out that her and a couple neighborhood friends with do the "booty dance"...showing each other their butt...?? innocent play?? did the little girl know/try to do something wrong...?? I'll never know. I know the 3rd girls parent involved took her DD to the doctors...she knew at the time but I didn't find out till a couple years later when my DD brought it up..

I would be concerned in this instance in case the child herself has had an inappropriate encounter and is just repeating the behavior. This is way young for exploring bodies that way.

I'd watch what I say when I explain it to a young child like that. I would go the it's not good to trade clothes route hygiene Etc as suggested above. I might mention that the private parts are not to be shared even when asked because they're private. You could say anything below the belly button is not for people even friends to look at.

Hindsight is 20/20 though and I wouldn't beat myself up too much about supervised and unsupervised times. Often kids play for a half an hour by themselves even little four-year-olds.

I would definitely supervise any play completely with this other four year old though.

As an isolated incident I really don't think this is anything to be concerned about. I taught preschool for a few years and kids said "booty" all the time and thought it was hilarious.

In every preschool I worked with, there's one very open bathroom with multiple toilets for the kids to share in each classroom. Both boys and girls use it at the same time so they have all seen each other practically naked. So I definitely don't think 4 is too young to notice and be curious about bodies. I could easily see it as a silly game some kids came up with.

(If anyone is curious about that, it's required by law that teachers be able to see preschool aged children at all times so no stalls or closed doors are used, and most places don't have the staffing for a full-time bathroom monitor. Child:teacher ratios are taken VERY seriously.)

A pattern or escalation would be more concerning. I'm sure Sally's mom will try to get to the bottom of it, no pun intended. :)

Sexual and body curiosity is normal at that age. It can be stronger if the child lives in a highly sexualized household. Many mothers think nothing of teaching their toddler daughters to dance in a sexually provocative manner and actually think it is "cute". Many times, there is too much nudity in the household (yes, there can be too much!). Some children have access to the cable TV and watch porn when left alone. Anything is possible.

I would simply tell her that it's not appropriate to undress with friends unless one is getting ready for bed or putting on swimwear. Even then, it's okay to be modest and to prefer privacy. Explain that girls should not show one another their "booty" just as boys should not take out their penises and show them around.

But normal children do these things all the time - they just need to be told not to do so in a calm, non-judgmental way, emphasizing that these are private parts and not to be shared indiscriminately.

I agree with Anglophilia. Normal. A teachable moment.

I am not a psychologist or teacher or early childhood expert. I did raise two girls (now in their 30's) though and I do remember for sure they would play dress up ALL the time. I remember when friends would come over to play they would almost immediately play dress up. However, they kept their underwear on.

I was reading this thinking that maybe I was too out of it but I don't think so. I think booty is a term I have rarely heard and certainly didn't hear it from 4 year olds, but then again maybe they heard that song shakeyourbooty.

Of course if there were more "questionable or unsettling" comments or behavior I would be concerned but I don't think this is cause for concern. I also do not think that 4 year olds playing together for 30 minutes without direct supervision is wrong. I don't mean to ignore them of course, but they sound like they were being independent . They do need to be told that private parts are private and sharing undies is not good hygiene.

I am surprised by the amount of people surprised that a 4 year old would say "booty." I have heard parents use "booty" when talking to their kids and telling them to sit down or to come over to them. In the context I've heard it's just a cutesy or silly way to say "butt."

I wouldn't think twice if a child said "booty" instead of butt or bottom as I don't consider it a bad word. It depends on the context though - if a 4 year old started talking about shaking her booty in a more sexual context I would definitely be concerned where she picked that up.

And young children just love repeating words that they think are a little naughty and that get a reaction from either adults or their friends. I could easily see 4 year olds saying "show me your booty!" and laughing hysterically because butts are funny to kids, especially using a silly word to describe them.

The children's behavior is not odd. It's the minds of the adults who are sexualizing the behavior who have the problem. It was quite common back in the day to see children under the age of six in public places without clothing. Swimming in rivers, lakes or at the beach. Before we came up with the concept of preschool and pre-schoolers, four year olds were considered older toddlers. The prudishness of the American culture astounds me. Nudity is not sexuality. Sexuality doesn't require nudity.

Booty is so a commonly used cute term for butt. I am surprised that so many people find it odd that young children would use the word. Both my grand kids went through a phase of removing their clothing at every opportunity at 3 and 4. Grand daughter at 6 is becoming more modest and seeks out her own privacy. Grandson at almost five is a bit better at keeping his boxer briefs on but he still strips off just about everything else when at home. Unless he is in one of his many Transformer costumes. LOL I don't expect either of them to grow up to be sexual deviants.

The only thing that needed to be said was a casual mention that clothes should stay on at play dates and underwear like toothbrushes should not be shared.

I am old enough (74) to remember when my sisters and I were allowed to run around outside without any tops on until we were at least 7 or 8 years old. Nothing to see here!

If it were my grandchild I would be concerned. They have to be seeing these things to have them in their mind. I don't think its normal at all.

It's common with children. I remember doing this when I was really small too. Kids are curious. They're too small for it to be sexual. Just curiousity because we adults make children cover up "private" parts.

My granddaughter learned that her 'lady parts' were *private* before she started preschool. Covering the genitals is standard *in our society*.

When I was a child, I had a 'bottom'. The term 'butt' wasn't used in polite society and was considered common. 'Booty' was unknown to me until I heard it *in sexual terms* in music videos a few decades ago. It was not a neutral term then. I don't think of it as neutral today.

"Booty" is a casual term today I'm sure parents are using. I would not be alarmed at that situation described. Children are as curious about bodies as they are about fairies and dinosaurs and everything else in a child's world. But it's never too early to begin gently talking with kids about who is allowed to *see* their booty.

I'm remembering my childhood -- I remember my sister and I and our cousin napping in one bed. We must have been four or under. We started to play and his mother came in and told us that would be enough of that. I'm sure we two girls were trying to see that little boy without his underwear. I don't ever remember any play like that with girls. I agree sex is everywhere these days and interest is all over the map. I would never rule out that Sally was abused. I would not want them to play alone for long periods.

All good advice to think about. i will mention to my daughter, when the picture fell off the wall somebody could have got hurt, maybe they shouldn't have been left unsupervised for so long. I have no objection to the word "booty".

"i will mention to my daughter"

Be sure to pick your spots to speak up about this or anything else, you're the best judge of that. If you've already discussed it with her, is another time necessary?

Alisande -- ha ha -- yes that's it!

I was going to say the same thing as Alisande. My cousin and I did the same sorts of things at 4 or 5. Neither of us turned out to be deviants. :) I thought it was a pretty normal part of growing up.