my husband saw a house with gray and loved it and open to all ideas. We would use someone who specializes and our contractor recommends. We do want to also update the pendant lights over the island.

I liked Crema Marfil and checked it,like, fifty times as a countertop option with my-new-then-to-be very warm greige/bordering oatmeal cabinets. I really wanted it to work, yet it didn't.

I guess it'll be a challenge to find gray paint-even very warm one-to support your other elements that are there to stay

Obviously photos you posted don't give one the truest feel of colors..maybe they seem more golden to me than they are..can you post a close up of floors and counters?

something along the lines of your wall colors will work..but you want to get away from the current look, why to go through this expensive hassle

I can see smth warmer yet lighter..creamier..

you can try of course to find your gray..the thing is: will it read as gray? willl it fit your vision?

If you make it purple enough -it can be a nice combo...but in order to get so, it'll be already more purple than gray

same thing with warm greens and blues..they can be muted(have gray in them), but they'll already be muted greens and blues rather than grays

when mixing neutrals in spaces that have natural stones etc, you need to be especially careful..you don't fight the neutral, you work with it, either by having another natural material that makes sense next to it, like your current stain, or by trying to repeat its nature, or by doing a color that'll contrast it in a way you'll continue to like your neutral.

You can't just pick color X and it'll work, because you already have many elements to work with,

Frankly I wouldn't paint at all, but rather play with hardware, lighting, introducing accessories that have gray in them(clay, fabrics, etc) so you can have your gray without big overhaul

Again, because I can't see close up of the flooring etc, I might be wrong because I can't see your colors correctly.

From your description (off white plus greige) it might work, I just can't see it on the photos

So. Additional photos would help.

And even then I think it should be something really warm comparing to other grays..light greige, something like it.

And I'm not sure that's what you're looking for. What are you looking for? In terms of vibe, you know?

What looks great in one kitchen wouldn't neccessarily work in other.

Even more than that, sometimes a paint color works on one wall in the space, but doesn't on the other:)

It's a lot of thinking, considerations, sampling(paint on wood will also always look different than on walls..so should be door samples)..and money.

Again, additional photos would help.

Try under counter lighting. What a difference it makes in a darker kitchen!

Painting will decrease your home's value and sale-ability. Maybe selling isn't on your radar--but you flush a good part of your investment when you cheapen the look of cabinets. Painted cabinets are a fad and won't stand the test of time. Proceed with CAUTION. Have you considered white? White is classic.

not selling and my husband is messy so white would be a bad choice for us and we have so many creams and off whites I think it would be tough

we do have under counter lighting it looks GREAT

You need to stop and come up with an overall plan for your kitchen before you do anything. Do not paint your kitchen cabinets gray. You say you may change the counter tops. You need to make a decision on that now. If you're not changing flooring and the back splash, IMO I'd stain the cabinets an espresso. You're getting yourself into a situation where everything is going to some shade of light beige-ish, and when you do that you have no contrast and nothing stands out so nothing looks good. Everything bleeds together into a sea of beige.