DH is built a lot like the photo pesky posted (who is NOT her DH, let's reiterate LOL), sans champagne, cigar, and truly frightening mullet. ;-) So I really, REALLY feel for her. DH is also extremely difficult to fit, especially those dang Incredible Hulk legs of his! Buying the suit for his mother's funeral about 8 years ago was a complete nightmare; we spent an entire DAY shopping, it all ended up costing us a month's house payment, and it doesn't fit right anymore either even though he weighs exactly the same now as he did then. (Ditto for the black dress suit I bought, although I was able to get it in 15 minutes and it cost a LOT less because unless I wanted to go to Boston I had a selection of Lane Bryant, Lane Bryant, and Lane Bryant! I weigh the same, wear the same size clothes, but neither the jacket nor the skirt hang right, and let's not discuss the trousers.) 99.9% of the time, unless it is specified that it is a formal occasion (and the last two evening weddings we went to were most decidedly NOT formal, so that "rule" is out the window!), DH gets away just fine with a NEW (unfaded) pair of black khakis/chinos/whateveryouwannacallthem, pressed to within an inch of their lives, black shoes (but you can get some good-for-a-half-dozen-wearings boring men's black shoes at Target for $20), new black socks (again, no fading), and a drycleaner-pressed button-down-collar white or oxford shirt. Regular undershirt, please, no "wifebeaters"! Tie for the ceremony itself but it comes off when the reception starts. LOL Back when they were more widely available DH found tab collars and band collars a lot more comfortable for thicker necks, but they're hard to find now. Thank heavens DH works in a business-casual office - if someone's wearing a tie to work there's instant gossip that they either have a date or an interview! - because if he had to wear suits we'd probably be living in a tent! I don't buy expensive shoes for DH because he destroys them. It doesn't matter if they're $20 or $200, they're trashed in short order (he wears through the leather on the sides). The $200 ones might last a few months longer, but they DEFINITELY don't stay nice looking ten times longer. The only time I spend money is on his running shoes (he does a half-marathon every other day), and even then I get last year's style/color at Sierra Trading or Campmor for half price. :-) Personally, unless you've got the bucks to burn, I think it's downright daft to spend a big fat wad of cash on a few pieces of clothing that you almost certainly will not ever wear again, and that may or may not fit (then there's more money down the drain on alterations, IF they can be altered), and that may or may not be hopelessly out of style should the occasion come up to wear that kind of clothing "someday"! If you KNOW the clothes will be worn again enough to justify the expense, that's another story, but I think pesky's made it pretty clear where on the spectrum her DH is... :-)

My heart feels for you Ceph. I had it easy because we were married in Vegas and the nice little chapel we were at did all the leg work. We did have to make some choices though and one was the corsages. We did get corsages for all immediate parents and my grandmother.... including my husbands step mom. Although she is not him mother, she does plan an important role in his life. The bottom line is this is your wedding. You need to do what is right for you...no one else. When you look back on things, how will you feel about choices. Will you regret not doing what your gut originally told you to do? Will it matter about the flowers or will she think the worst no matter what? Do you think you will be going through all this effort to please with no result? Some people just won't be pleased no matter what you do. Interesting side note, my father's significant other showed at our wedding. My dad passed in 2002 and I felt like I should invite his SO not thinking he would show for the wedding. I received his RSVP at the last minute. I was very nervous- my dad's SO's name is David. Now you can see why I was a little nervous. I didn't know how he would behave because - let's say- everyone knows when he walks into a room. To my surprise, he was very tame and when we did the toast, he was the only one the mentioned my Dad in a very respectable manner. He disappeared after the wedding. He didn't come to the dinner and I haven't heard from him since. I did sent a framed picture of him, my husband and I to him at Christmas. In the end, I was very glad he was there. I think I 'm telling this story just to say, sometimes people surprise you. I hope you can have that same kind of experience.

I think it's interesting that, as feminism and self-empowerment becomes pretty much a given, that cosmetic and body modification and body display has all increased. a 1970s-era feminist would find clothing like this (and cosmetic surgery, and breast implants) self-demeaning and self-objectifying but a millennial feminist seems to find it all body-positive and empowering. I said before but my rule of thumb is: who is going to be seeing this, and where, and how are they getting there? These events are taking place in a closed environment, and to some extent the girls are dressing for each other. I am not sure that boys are paying attention to the clothing, and if the girls participate in sports and other activities these same boys and girls have seen each other in less. That said, I wouldn't really want to see the girls going into town or on public transportation dressed quite like some of these outfits. Objectively I guess, I don't find a lot of it particularly flattering but there are a lot of women's clothes that are not particularly flattering and emphasize the most minimal "flaws" right now. And sometimes you see this sort of thing on men, too, if you live in an urban area; super tight pants or shirts that don't really look so great.

Consider yourselves fortunate that you can get something altered down. I am 5' 11" and before back surgery I was 6'. You can't add length. As far as shoes, It is just as impossible to find a 9.5 narrow (the size I wore pre kids) and now an 11 shoe, as it is to find a small shoe, but more and more manufacturers are adding larger sizes in shoes to accomodate for the change in society. Stuart Weitzman was my go to shoe too Flo. One of the few designers that made a 9.5 narrow shoe at the time. You would have loved working in the shoe department at Nordstroms. The small feet gals were given all the sample sizes and the designers would come in and talk about their shoes and give them samples too. Ferragamo especially. I was so jealous!