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Stepfamily weddings question re: flowers

16 years ago

I have asked this on a wedding site too, but you are the stepfamily experts...

Quick background:

My mom passed away 10 years ago. My dad is remarried. My stepmom and I get along great.

FDH's parents are divorced (for over 15 years) and have nothing to do with one another.

His dad remarried this winter to the woman he's been with for about 13 years. FDH's SM is very involved and is a wonderful lady.

His mom is single and is not what you would call an active mother (For example, she recently told me she didn't need our phone number now that FDH's brother was living with her again and that she would just email FDH if she needed to talk to us)...

Anyhow, here's the problem. We have wonderful SM's that we want to honour in our wedding ceremony, but his is kinking this plan. For example - she pitched a fit when FDH's dad and SM had "family photos" taken with the kids because "she's not your family"... She barely came to FDH and his brother's graduations because FMIL thought that she was being excluded because FSMIL was there.

So, we want to have corsages for our SMs and his mom, but his mom told him a few years ago that "if you ever get married, I'd better be more important in your wedding than your dad's GF"... So we're thinking that maybe we should get her a wristlet and our SMs corsages. It's a $10 way to keep her placated, but we don't want our SMs to feel slighted. My dad said it would be better to keep everything equal, but said that he has no clue what to do about FMILzilla-the-jealous-monster either.

Any suggestions? (Oh, BTW, if it matters, she's not paying for anything)

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