My style is now a trend rant
Elle
6 years ago
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I think I've reached my limit-a rant (LONG)
Comments (26)I love you guys!! Thank you so much for the sage advice and the virtual shoulders to lean on. Today I called my son and told him I was coming over to help him deep clean his house. I guess I left my cell phone at home, cuz DH had to text DS to get in touch with me. How liberating that was!! I worked really hard at DS's house, but he worked along side me and was wonderful company, so even tho I'm sore and tired, it was a good day. DS was VERY appreciative of me being there to help him and I liked doing it for him. I'm going to try to talk to DH tonight. He has a tendency to avoid conflict, and while I don't want conflict, I DO need him to hear me. DH has been self employed for years, just recently his business (more like a hobby income the last year or so) has just about come to a standstill. The things he makes are not a necessity item, so he's not bringing in the $$ like before. We can basically only count on my income...which is plenty for us to live comfortably on, but not where we can still live like we do and support another person. DH's income was for the fun stuff and extras for the most part. Rose...your DH sounds so much like mine. When my SS lived with us, it was horrible, too. He was much like yours and when he finally left our house for good, it was like a weight off my shoulders. But he almost tore us apart. My DH has always had a tendency to put his family ahead of me. For the most part, I dealt with it, but they've intruded into our life for the past couple years to the point where I can't take it any more. We've got an empty nest, and I want to enjoy it. We were both parents when we met, so we never had time alone together until the kids were grown. We were starting to have fun together when MIL became a pretty much every day fixture in our lives. She started backing off after I complained to DH, and it was ok, but now BIL is here. I'm just not sure of his situation. MIL said that his wife told her she does not want to reconcile. She wants to be friends with him, she loves him but is not in love...blahblah. He's holding on to the idea that they're going to reconcile. He goes over to her place at least once a week and stays there, but apparently stays on the sofa, and the other day he said he had to sleep on the floor because grandkids or something were there. Yesterday he told me he has an interview at a gym, I asked him about it and it's a fly-by-night outfit (he's a certified personal trainer) and he's been talking alot about how unhappy he is at his job (he works in retail and has a decent job w/bennies). This is his history, he's never worked at a job longer than 2 years, and he's just about past that time now, so he's ready to move on. DH said BIL is broke all the time, likely because he's giving his wife the $$, and that is again typical of him. So I'm not sure how the money thing will work. But frankly, it's not my problem!! The holiday thing...when my Dad was alive, he and my DH did not get along. My DH made every excuse in the book not to spend holidays at my parents, so to avoid the fight with him, and the tension if they were all together, I'd take the kids to my folks and he'd stay with his kid. It made me angry, but I chose the lesser of 2 evils. Later, we noticed a trend, DH would get pouty and start picking fights shortly before holidays. I finally figured it out, that he didn't want to spend time with my family and holidays always included them. His family was not nearby and when they were, they wouldn't come...they didn't want to celebrate. So once I figured out his M.O., I realized it wasn't ME, it was him...and I wouldn't let him get his way. He would pitch a fit and try to get out of events, but I'd make him participate. And what do you know, he always enjoyed himself! But I also learned that he;d bug out early, so I got used to it. He's very shy and not comfortable around people he's not really used to. I'm the opposite, I am gregarious and love to socialize. Well, this year, our DD who was married last year said she would like to host Thanksgiving at her house and have her in-laws and her family together. I am thrilled and am excited to do this with her, but as soon as DH found out (he read the email from DD) he said he was spending T'giving with his Mom. He is extremely uncomfortable about DD's in-laws, he only met them the first time at the rehearsal dinner, and barely spoke with them during the wedding weekend. So he's going to try everything he can to try to get out of going. I'm not going to say a word to him about it...I thought about trying to cajole him, but I'm going to let it be up to my kids to make him understand how disappointed they'll be if he doesn't spend time with them because he's shy and being a baby. But now, with BIL here, or at least in the proximity, he'll find every excuse, and likely his mother will want her boys over to her house. Anyway, it's just drama that I do not want to contend with, and honestly, I thought it was all over with...that DH had moved on, because every year I host a big Christmas party with lots of people and he enjoys it. It's almost like he's taken 3 giant steps back now that his brother is here every day. So the more I think about it, the more I think I need to get DH alone...sit him down and lay it out. I've already made up my mind that I WILL leave him if his mother ever has to come live with us!...See MoreTell me your prediction for the next big kitchen style trend??
Comments (37)I would think during a recession, people focus on saving money. Say not eating out to save money. Making the kitchen more important than ever. Buying things in quanity when they go on sale. So storage space or pantry's would be a high priority. Children are living at home longer and multiple generations are living together now. You may need 3 or 4 microwaves to accomodate ALL those people. Dinning rooms, breakfast bars,dens and livingrooms may become obsolete. A kitchen with a BIG eating area doubling as a livingroom would be the new trend. Recycling as the worlds population grows may become more than "the right thing to do". Maybe it would be a law, to sort your trash before it could be picked up? So multiple trash bins, say 5 or 6 might be incorporated as a "new" trend? OR....maybe they will develop a trash zapper. It would zap the trash like on star trek into another dimension.....:0) We would all need one of those!!! lol...See MoreMy Rant: Overly Scented Stores
Comments (39)I can relate to so many of these comments. I feel too, that we are bombarded by fragrance now, and I don't know if I changed or the industry changed - but after 1985 I stopped wearing all perfumes. Before that, I was one of those offenders, wearing Shalimar, Chanel 19, Givenchy, went crazy over them. That was the year was pregnant and had my son so maybe my body changed during that time and never went back. Now, so many things bother me!! Stores filled with candles, eucalyptus, incense, room fresheners, people drenched in cologne, cars with cardboard pine cones hanging from the rearview mirror, or scented with artificial strawberry (that one has to be the worst) - even on the beach this summer, I had to move to a different spot because the person 30 feet away from me had some kind of artificial coconut sun tan lotion on that just reeked. I even have to avoid the aisle in the supermarket where the artifically buttered microwave popcorn lurks. All I can smell is "rancid." LOL. It's banned at home as well - unless I'm out of the house, the kids cannot make it! I'm not allergic in the true sense of the word but get an immediate sinus headache from all these things. I don't use fabric softener or any detergent with scent. It's amazing too, how nice and "crisp" clothes feel when they haven't been "softened" (i.e. covered with a layer of grease). We have a blended family and when my son comes home from his dad's house,and my stepdaughters come back from their mom's, I can smell the Bounce sheets a mile away. That reminds me. We bought a vacation home last year and the previous owner must have read one of those Household Hint columns. There were individual Bounce sheets in every drawer, every cupboard, behind furniture and even under carpets. I'm still looking for them every time I go up there. And I'm sure that on some level, even by my family, I am viewed as a "fussy" person, so I hate making a big deal of it. I know people are tired of hearing me protest. But even chenille sweaters bug me -- blocked sinuses, itchy eyes. So added to all those "oh no, Hon, what's that new smell on you?" comments, my husband has to try to not wear the nice gifts he got from his daughters. LOL, yesterday my son came home with a bag of hazelnut flavoured coffee. I started to rant. Everyone else loves it, and all I can think about is a sandwich place I used to go to at lunch time, where the tuna, roast beef and egg salad sandwiches all tasted like hazelnut coffee because they had a pot of it brewing in there all the time. Revolting! That's my rant over. Thank you for allowing me to express this. It needed to come out! lol Pam...See MoreRant: "Where's my morning Tribune?"
Comments (17)Our local paper is really declining and DH is a real newspaper man. He'll often have read two or three before the day is up, stopping at his sisters to get her Seattle paper on his way out of here, sometimes picking up either the Olympia or Tacoma paper too at some point during the day. Our local paper quit printing on Mondays some time back. Now, it's reduced to three days a week delivery/printing. We've had nice carriers, all adult men, no newsboys (or girls) and most of them with kids of their own, little resources. We've been lucky, no one has insisted we put a paper box (tube) at the top of our uphill circular driveway, they have all generously agreed to make the drive through, put the paper in the mail slot on the side of the house so that it falls indoors. I say Thank You a lot. If I'm in my office I smile and wave, acknowledge him through the window. I'm a big tipper, monthly and I give an extra cash amount mid summer and again at Christmas. I don't know how it compares, but we pay $41.25 for three months of three days per week local newspaper.....Plus tips....See MoreElle
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