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2manydiversions

Confessions of a Custard Snob – Pots De Crème

2ManyDiversions
6 years ago

Caution: Desserts ahead : - )

I eat Big Macs and hot dogs. I’ve bought instant scalloped potatoes and used Velveeta (that stuff’s expire-by date is scary-long, and it’s never in the refrigerator section!) and…. You get the gist, I’m not a food snob.

But when it comes to Custards, I am a snob. My first custard introduction was as a child with tonsillitis. My Mom made me Floating Island pudding to soothe my throat. Midway through heaven, I was pushing the brown-tipped mounds of meringue out of the way, delighting in every spoonful of crème anglaise bliss! I was hooked.

Don’t get me wrong; cookies, cakes, tarts, pies, candies, pavlovas… I love all desserts, but when it comes to custards, I’m an elitist. They must be just so. Instant Jell-O pudding served for dessert? I squirm uncomfortably with each bite if I feel the grainy texture between my teeth. When cheesecake recipes read “it’s done when a crack forms in the middle” I scream with the fury of a woman scorned… “NOoooo!”


Custards can go wrong… they break, they weep, they curdle, they won’t thicken, they are too thick, they are grainy, they crack, they form skins. It happens. Even to me… The Custard Snob. But I try everything in my cooking arsenal to prevent this: Bain Marie, fine-mesh sieves, tempering, saran wrap, my fingers (to break bubbles). I can whisk with the ferocity of a wolverine and the speed of a cheetah going after a gazelle (but my stamina can’t match the former or the latter). I watch my temperatures like a hawk. I skim foam like a pelican skims for herring. Ok, too many animal metaphors.


But custards are divine. Rich, decadent, silky thin, creamy and thick. They are sandwiched between and inside all manner of pastry; they are the pools of pleasure beneath or poured over cakes, ice creams, fruits… and if one wishes to be technical, there are puddings, there are pastry creams, then there are custards, and then there are frozen custards… I’m not so strict in my definitions of custard.


Custards I’ve made:

Cheesecake, Flan, Crème brulee, coffee cubed on coconut crème anglais (cubed coffee is gelatinized coffee, cut in cubes), eclairs filled with custard, Boston cream pies…


Pain au chocolat served with an almond-chocolate Tuile filled and orange crème pâtissière, chocolate ‘chopstick’

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Pate a Choux Swans filled with vanilla Crème Chiboust
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Lemon Chiffon, lemon confit, on chocolate custard with cherry sorbet in a blown sugar bubble
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Mille Crepe Cake (a million -just kidding- thin crepes with Crème Chiboust. I think I came in at 39 crepes on this one
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Strawberry tart with crème pâtissière, served with a blown sugar strawberry (strawberry flavored)
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Raspberry mousse in a chocolate cup, on a bed of vanilla crème anglaise with raspberry coulis
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Arguably not a custard: Blancmange with mango coulis
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Savory custards: Quiche
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Frozen custards: Baked Alaska on a pecan-almond Dacquoise with chocolate-pecan ice cream, topped with caramel dipped pecans
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And then there is the Crème de la crème of custards, Pots de Crème! Silky texture, perfect mouthfeel. My favorite custard. Unencumbered. Just custard. Vanilla, blood orange, coffee, maple, salted caramel, ginger, lemon-thyme, basil {spoken with reverence)… and chocolate {spoken with a slight edge of distaste}.

Custards want you to baby them. They don’t like shortcuts. No bake? Blender? I shudder at the thought. They do not have bubbles. They are not to be grainy. They are not fluffy. Foam is the enemy.


So, in short (why are you laughing?), yesterday I made vanilla, café, and au chocolat pots de crèmes. I don’t care for chocolate pots de crème. Chocolate, by its very nature cannot give any self-respecting pot de crème the perfect mouthfeel. It just can’t. But, alas, I’m a chocoholic.

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As DH was dipping his spoon in, he said: “So… this is pudding”. I gasped, I cringed, and I smiled and said, “yes, babe, it’s pudding”.


Do you like custards, and if so, what are your favorite custards?

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