No, I don't find that to be true. There are times that a good deed comes back to bite, but "no good deed ...." hasn't proven true for me at all. Even if it were true, good deeds are a good thing.

No. I have found that every small thing I am able to do for others is repaid in kindness...a smile... Oh sure there is a very small minority that are unresponsive and possibly down right rude, but I prefer to think that I've still improved their day and that they just don't understand how to relate to stranger's kindness.

Occasionally there will be unanticipated negative results from a good deed. But to me, by far the majority of times, a good deed often makes the doer more engaged with his/her world and feel better. Those who are lonely or depressed and decide to help others often find that their outlook on life improves.

Certainly, children see everything even when you think they are not watching, and their seeing the positive goodness in the world by your good deeds may help teach them to do the same if the opportunity arises.

For the most part, I don't agree, but Debby makes a point. The more you do, the more is expected. Where do you draw the line?

Debby, if you're being paid by the hour, why does it matter what you're doing?

Elmer, because I get paid to do one job, which quite often I can't get done in my 8 hour shift (we are not allowed to work overtime) to do the job that people who went to college are trained to do. So it matters.

One good deed is a good deed, enabling is another question.

Sometimes. Several years ago I loaned a friend (I hadn't seen in 20 years) a sizable amount of money so she could pay her mortgage and buy some Christmas presents. I sent her more money several months later. I did it knowing deep down I probably wouldn't see any of it back but was hoping she might make an effort....$5.00, $10.00 here and there for a show of good faith. Last time I talked to her was a couple of years ago, I called to wish her a Happy Birthday. Her birthday is New Year's Eve. She couldn't talk very long because she had friends coming over for dinner. She had just picked of Chinese food.......she traditionally has Chinese on her birthday. I didn't say anything but couldn't help thinking she could afford to have friends over for dinner but couldn't send a few dollars toward her loan. I haven't heard from her since. I don't know if it's because she feels guilty or because I decided not to shell out any more money. I don't regret doing it but am sad with the outcome. Most of the time I think we get more out of the good deed than the recipient.

Hmm, Debby, something isn't clear to me. If you get paid to work 8 hours and overtime isn't permitted, then you work 8 hours doing whatever you do and whatever you can't do (because you've been given more than 8 hours of work) goes undone or is done by someone else. That's their choice, isn't it?

My believe has always been that positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. If you do a good deed for someone with out expectations, it’s a positive and that will bring something positive back to you. If you do something for someone because you feel you have to or with negative feelings behind it, you’ll usually end up being disappointed.

Yes, I believe. Wednesday, Neighbor was trimming a tree. I helped him clean up, got some tree sap on my pants.

https://www.facebook.com/lovewhatreallymatters/videos/1782520408437016/

Other people have their own jobs to do. You've never worked retail, right?

I think Debby needs a raise if she's going beyond her 'job description'.

If you do a good deed without expecting any gratitude, you're less likely to feel disappointed in whatever the reaction may be.

I do think people resent aid from a Lady Bountiful. (It costs her little, yet she expects gratitude.)

I'm impressed to see how much is given by people who can least afford it, compared to mere "feel good" charity from people who have never known want.

Wrong. I worked grocery for 6 years while in school. A not so proud member but a member all the same of Retail Clerks Local 770.

When given more to do than time allows, or when something runs longer than expected and no extra help is provided, the responsibility for dealing with what's not finished belongs to the manager only. That's what the expression "I punch in, do my job, then punch out" implies - responsibility and consequences of assignments rest with someone paid to make decisions, not those paid to do the work.

Generally, I don't seem to find this saying true for me.

I recently had a situation though that annoyed me. A friend is a director of a Christian pre-school. She told me about some of the kid's parents struggle with coming up with the tuition payment. I offered to help out one little boy whose family needed some help by paying a half a school year's tuition. It was only $425. We called it a "scholarship." The understanding was that the parents would be able to save $$ for the second half of the year. My friend recently contacted me to see if i could pay for the second half of the school year.

Um, no, I can't. I felt it inappropriate to be asked to pay more, when the original arrangement was I would pay for the first part of the school year, and that would allow the parents to come up with $425 to pay for the rest of the year.

It took the fun out of helping this little boy and his parents. When my generosity becomes expected, I stop. And don't come back to me for more money.

It hasn't jaded me though. I'll still help where I can, but don't come to me asking for more than I already gave. I'm not supporting this kid through college.

Well, times they have changed since you were in school. With cutbacks in hours etc., my job is my job is my job and if it doesn't get done and I have double up the next day to get it done. We all have our work to do. But for some reason, some people don't have to do certain jobs anymore and it got put on me, and now I do the job of two. It's lucky for them I'm fast (and quite accurate) because not getting things done isn't an every day thing. But there are days where it's impossible.

Debby, I think at some point you need to look for another job. You are clearly being taken advantage of.

I get paid well. It's the only reason I stay. And I like the majority of my coworkers. And at my age, I would not find another job easily, especially at my present wage. I also get 3 weeks paid vacation a year. Now that I don't "have" to work to pay for the house, I don't find it a job anymore. I know I can leave if I want to, but I don't want to. The way I see it: at least I have a job. So many people don't. I just have to move a little faster.... And yes, it hurts the joints lately. lol

Debby have you gone to your superior and explained there's not enough time in your work hours to do your job and someone else's? What would happen if you did your job but not someone else's job? Is there another shift following yours that do the same work you do? I'd be talking to my supervisor....someone thinks your part of the justice league.

Debby, I agree with you, in certain industries, being a team worker or jumping in to give a hand often times doesn’t come back in kind, especially in this day and age. It’s sad because when team work was the norm, moral and productivity were overall much higher. Your situation IMO, is no more than a reflection of poor management.

“Wrong. I worked grocery for 6 years while in school. A not so proud member but a member all the same of Retail Clerks Local 770.”

Seriously Elmer?

You’re going to compare your experience from how many years ago with someone who is working in retail right now? That union you weren’t so happy about being a member of is what dictated that you got done what you got done in 8 hours and the rest was the employers worry; not the employer. Unions are pretty much a thing of the past especially in retail and in this generation’s work environment, you either keep up or get replaced, it’s as simple as that.

Debby, you're the expert about your situation and I don't mean to presume or assume anything. It may be different where you are or with your company. In my area, while grocery workers are paid pretty well (though newer ones less well than those with more seniority because of union concessions to address out of control hourly rate creep), I see very little hustle and even less pride of position in the grocery and drugstore workers I encounter.

lukki, YOUR guesses and assumptions are way off. Grocery jobs with large chains are still unionized in California (not TJs, not Costco, but most of the others). For my grocery career, the union was an expensive hindrance, a cost and not a benefit to me in any way at all.

Elsewhere, yes, unions are fading from view. In the rust belt and FORMER manufacturing regions, especially the Midwest and Upper Midwest, the unions can be thanked for job losses that resulted from companies having to move plants abroad and to the less-unionized South to keep wage costs manageable.

lukkirish.....the 3 big grocery stores here are ALL union(King Soopers, Albertsons, Safeway). I hang out with a lot of the cashiers, according to them nothing has changed since I once worked customer service or the bakery at a grocery store.

People got a ,50 cent an hr raise every year...over time it added up!

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Back to the question: Yes, I find it to be true. and W H Y ?

The old saying...give an inch, they take a mile.

No I don't believe that. The good feeling I get from a good deed done is more than reward enough for me. I find most people appreciative and thankful.

I haven't heard from her since. I don't know if it's because she feels guilty or because I decided not to shell out any more money

If she popped up after 20 years and approached you for money - one or both times you funded her - and now carries on as if there was no debt, then it will be the latter. As in you got taken. By someone who is not really a friend at all.

In fact it wouldn't surprise me if she has been living off of "friends" in this manner for years.

Because, unfortunately, I have had my own inadequately guarded involvement with this kind of behavior. As in tens of thousands of dollars in supposed business loans and not a penny in repayment. Nor will I ever see any, from what turned out to be a drug addict.

Before I - and spending most of their money on narcotics bought off the street - came into the picture they got a girlfriend to buy their work truck for them.

And while I was still feeding them money, like an animal parent that presents food every time an offspring shows its face they suggested I sell my house "So we can all move to Idaho". (I didn't).

**Whether or not a good deed is punished depends entirely on the behavior and perspective of the recipient**

Which is something that varies - as in all situations the details of all elements involved with acts of kindness are critical to the outcomes.

the unions can be thanked for job losses that resulted from companies having to move plants abroad and to the less-unionized South to keep wage costs manageable

I - don't - think - that - is - quite - what - this - situation - was ...

I always thought it was "No good deed goes unnoticed ". Makes more sense to me .

Those days are long gone in most areas Nicole. Not only does the economy in California help to boost wages, but the employer laws there are definitely more employee friendly as well. On a national level, many states are becoming “at will” employers and can let someone go at will for no reason at all. It’s a real stressor for many older employees and not just in retail.

I worked in a grocery store in the 80’s (Market Basket) in Louisiana, it was one of my funnest jobs. It was also non union and paid minimum wage, as were all of the stores there that I knew of but I could be wrong.. Kroger (Which owns Ralphs) in our state is non union and the store Debby works in, in Canada I’m guessing is non union as well. IMO, Non union is a completely different ball game and not even comparable.

I’m with MM - but maybe it depends on the situation. In some cases, sadly, people are prone to take advantage so it ruins it for others.

Nicole can more than speak for herself but I believe she lives in Colorado.

As far as the "union presence" in the workforce, while certainly heavily influenced by the auto industry, I believe union membership in lukki's state (Michigan, I think) has historically been much higher than in California. Though, of course, falling in recent years.

I also suspect that the greatest unionized "sector" in California is governmental workers, to include school teachers. These are jobs influenced by population, to be sure, but not by the economy.

I’ve always connected her to Northern CA, for some reason, but I think you may be right. Sorry Nicole!!!

It's a cute saying but way more often than not, I find it untrue.

I have a different feeling that many as far as employment. I don't support the union attitude of "it's not my job". I always looked at it that my employment was to better the company. That's why I'm being paid. If someone has extra time on their hands then I believe they SHOULD be doing something else. If you have nothing to do, FIND something to do. There's always something to do and something that needs to be done. Nothing frustrates me, nay, angers me more than going to the post office and seeing the line of people with 1 person waiting on them and 4 or 5 standing around behind the counter because "it's not their job" to help.

By doing more than required, I can name 5 jobs where I was promoted rapidly and receiving other benefits. There was one job where I was penalized for doing more, but again, that's not the norm in my experience.

Seems to me if you are having an issue doing your job you need to talk to your supervisor.

The 'not my job' mentality is well and strong. I'm not a union member, nor do I think unions are necessary anymore.

There are 3 apartments in our building. 2 of them rented by seniors, and the 3rd, us.

The male is a former union worker, and it's blatant that he won't do anything, if someone else will. Since it's just a small building, and the landlords live in their house down the street, we take the recycling/green bin and garbage to the curb every week. Hubby and I do it. The other tenant will walk by the empty bins and not bring any in. He won't even crush any of his water bottles, his 2-litre milk carton, his pop cans, etc. They take up too much room unless they're crushed. So I crush them all, just so I can put my recycling in. I get ticked every-single-time. He sees me do it, yet he won't. He's divorced, and I'll bet his wife did every single thing for him, and he let her.

He did a load of laundry recently and I used it the next day with darks. I had white fluff from a kleenex all over everything. I asked if he'd wipe out the machine when he's washed a kleenex accidentally and he said he always cleans his pockets and he wouldn't leave a kleenex in them. It happened to me just the other day again, so from now on, I'll make sure not to do a load after he's used it. He'll just lie anyway. (He's also lied about a few other things as well). He denied smoking even though it can be smelled in the building. I asked if he started smoking and he said that he's seen people walk in and sit on the steps and smoke! LOL I don't care for him, in case you can't tell. :-)

Elmer, in your responses, you keep referring to California as if IT sets the standards but I’ve lived in California (raised there actually) and have lived in several parts of the country. If anything IMO, it IS the exception as opposed to the rule. If I’m not mistaken (again) Debby is in Alberta Canada, which is a completely different demographic from California or even the USA so who are we to even say or question?

Unions may be predominant in teaching, auto factories and the like, but not in retail. These are also completely different fields with different pay grades and different expectations kind of like comparing Apples to Oranges again, IMO. (Not to mention that I beleive she referred to be working in a Pharmacy and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a Pharmacy that was unionized.)

Jasdip, your post is a perfect example of why I hated apartment life and I’m sorry you have those frustrations...they may seem small to someone just reading a rant, but I can relate to each and every one. We had a guy who would get drunk and then yell volgarities when he saw us outside. Sometimes, he’d even yell them at us through the shared wall in the middle of the night obviously so we couldn’t sleep. We’d never met him or done anything that we knew of to provoke him, it started almost immediately after moving in. He was a total nut job. In the building prior to that, we had a neighbor with a pig and he’d let it potty on the balcony right next to ours. The smell and flies were so horrific, we couldn’t open our balcony door. His girlfriend would wash it’s bedding in the same washer everyone else had to use and wouldn’t clean it either. Let me just say, I know dog and cat hair is no fun, but Pig’s hair? Well, it’s just gross.

A pet pig in an apartment!? Who would've thought!

lukki, I'm not sure what you're trying to say or what this conversation is about. I was talking about unionized grocery stores, did you miss that? They're not a thing of the past as you suggested, the chains that have long been unionized still are. I'm talking about my area because that is what I'm most familiar with, I made that clear. As for pharmacies, the major chains here have historically been unionized too - CVS, Thrifty's, Rite-Aid, Longs (now owned by CVS), etc. You've "never seen them" is another way of saying you didn't know. I didn't say it was a trend, although California has long been a trend setter for many other things in the US.

I know, the often mindless robots that work in mall retail stores aren't usually in unions, that wasn't what I ever mentioned.

Happy New Year to you and everyone else too.

I do good deeds because it makes my heart happy. I am always rewarded because of the happiness it brings to me. Sometimes I am also punished but I get over it. Shame on them.

While the location I work in is non-union, we do have a location that is union. Again: I didn't mean for this to turn into a debate about "not my job". As I said before, "at least I have a job" and I do like 99% of the people I work with. It's why I stay. BTW, "It's not my job" may come out of my mouth now and then, but I do it. Why? Because I'm paid to do it and if my boss says to do it, I do it. I'm really starting to be sorry for even answering this post in the first place. ;)

Don't be sorry. I'm glad for your comments, the direction they started was as interesting or more so compared to the starting point.

Debby, don’t be sorry, it’s just conversation, threads have a way of taking on a life of their own and that’s ok. It would be pretty boring if they didn’t. :c)

Elmer, I’m kind of lost at what my point was as well, I’ve had too many interuptions today and haven’t focused as much as I should have before I responded.

Happy New Year as well!

There are some posts I just skip over. And mostly afraid to comment as I know it will be displeasing to at least one person.

Debby I don't think anyone was deliberately bashing you for making 'not my job' posts. I certainly wasn't. I was venting about the attitude that I've seen with unionized workers. My fellow tenant is a perfect example. Overall he's a lazy person. He spends his days at the gym (so he says). I have no idea if he actually goes, he says he's heading there when I see him and say hi, and he's gone all day long and comes home at dinner time. But he doesn't lift a finger as a general courtesy to anyone else.

Jasdip is that tenant working there? If not it sounds like he is just plain lazy. Nothing to do (in his case) with a union .

Hmm, I don't understand why you relate your lazy, thoughtless neighbor to his union status, Jas. My daughter belongs to one and she is not at all similar to this character. I'm sorry to see the decline of unions because regulations for large companies are going the way of the dinosaurs.

Yep: corporations have taken over the society including the government - with the wealthy having made gains on the order of a trillion dollars this past year, as a direct result of the current system - yet some want to continue to gripe about supposedly parasitic unionized labor.

When in fact American worker productivity is at an all time high. Appreciation for which is being shown by low pay that makes it impossible for many to find affordable housing, the mass exportation of manufacturing jobs and the move toward across the board automation - including even the testing of driver-less tractor-trailers.

With the resulting creation of millions of destitute Americans no longer able to consume much in the way of commercially generated products and services apparently not being a concern due to the arising of huge new markets in China and India.

"When in fact American worker productivity is at an all time high."

What is the source for this comment? The real measure is cost and not just efficiency. If you can pay half as much for 80% of the efficiency, you're ahead.

I don't think so many companies would have moved manufacturing jobs abroad, and would continue to do so, if using US labor were cost effective. There are too many examples to cite, including all the Asian and European companies that have massive operations in Mexico to serve the US market. I've read many articles talking about how capable and hard working Mexican factory workers are. Such articles about US workers - not so much.

What is the source for this comment?

It's not a secret.

The attraction of third world labor markets for western based companies is the terrible compensation etc. they can get away with there, and how this is a boost to profits. Period. And not that they just couldn't function at all in the presence of labor unions.

Saying "it's not a secret" isn't a source.

When you go shopping, are your decisions not influenced by looking for lower prices? If not, you're unlike most of your fellow Americans (and people elsewhere in the world). Lower priced goods of equal quality sell more than higher priced alternatives. Quality matters too. That's what drives cost considerations and, as I mentioned before, assessing productivity is only part of the process.

The role of businesses is to produce goods and services that customers buy. In doing so, they provide jobs and a return for investors. Money losing businesses go out of existence and don't employ anyone. Everyone involved benefits, by being employed and by being an investor (if one so chooses). Even government funding (for their employment and goods and services we all expect of them) rely on businesses to provide money flows and employment in the local economies that can be taxed.

Yes, those union workers are lazy. And don't get me started on government employees! Those baby boomers are selfish, the millennials are clueless, and Californians are just plain crazy! People who live in Florida can't drive, men don't know how to clean a bathroom, and women are just looking for a meal ticket. And kids these days!

Jeez, people, way to brush large groups of people with a single brush!

I want to tell my union story. I was a member of the teacher's union for years, just paying my dues. My school district got into its head that nurses should also teach in order to maximize their value to the district, so I was assigned a bunch of health classes which amounted to several hours a day.

One was an over-enrolled K class of students who mostly knew no English. That one was a nightmare, the kids ran around, the administrators said it was my problem, I knew not enough Spanish to keep order and safety let alone teach health.

Not a lot of thought was put into nursing, and teachers would send sick kids into my classroom while I was teaching. So then the poor secretary was forced into being the nurse while I taught, and there were some pretty unfortunate issues, like a child with a fracture being sent back to class with an ice pack, that arose out of this although I know she tried her best.

After a serious asthma emergency that was mishandled by the office, I called the union. Please note that I am extremely hard working, got to work at 7AM daily so that any parents who needed a conference before they went to work could have one, rarely took a lunch out of the clinic because my opinion is that students don't become ill on a schedule and I wanted to be there when they did, and I rarely refused a request, but this shoddily arranged teaching assignment seemed headed for disaster and I did not know what to do, the school administrators just wanted to show their bosses that they were following the latest edict.

The union took care of the issue and my teaching assignment was rescinded. I dare any one of you to fault either me or the union for what was done. To me, the union was a life saver, not only mine but I was sure that there would be a fatal disaster involving one of the students sooner or later if the situation continued. I don't see how anyone could fault them.