The internet isn't big enough for the stories I could tell. I work retail... ;)

Hahaha Debi! Retail is amazing for stories. Once when working at a very upscale clothing store, a customer urinated on the bench in the fitting room. It was shocking to me, i’ve heard that is not completely rare.

Well I am a bit of a stickler for spelling and grammar. I don't correct people other than DH, but I notice.

Our plant manager was retiring, and a giant banner was made by a local sign shop. The entire staff (400 people) was going to assemble and have a picture made under the banner. When the facilities department got the banner to the office, they unrolled it in our hallway. It read "Good by Bob!" I just had to point out that there was a spelling error. The response? "Oh, they did it that way because the sign wasn't long enough."

SMH. They used it that way for the photo.

Hahaha that’s funny!! The company that my husband works for did an employee survey on whether or not the employees felt that management listened to them....management over a year later realized they never reviewed the results, never even looked at it.

I was at work outside smoking a cigarette. One of my friends was leaving the parking lot in her minivan. She was looking at me and waiving goodbye and didn’t see the car coming into the parking lot. She hit him head on while waiving at me. I felt terrible. The guy coming toward her wasn’t paying attention either, the accident knocked the cellphone right out of his hand.

The not funny part is I had to be a witness against my friend.

That must have been tricky JeCrigler.

It wasn’t fun. They were both at fault but my friend should have been paying attention and swerve to the right and would have avoided the accident. She was in the middle.

I worked in the office of an elementary school. One of my co-workers was a wildlife rehabber and was nursing a bald eagle that had been shot by some idiot back to health. Wanting to feed the eagle it's natural diet, she put out word that she was accepting roadkill. I walked into work one morning and there was a brown paper bag on my desk. I looked inside and found three roadkill squirrels and one roadkill rabbit along with a note that said, "please give to Susie".

Having worked in a school for many, many years, I have a gazillion stories I could tell.

Dawn, that reminds me. My 5th grade school teacher was bringing in a black widow spider to keep in the classroom for us to study.

On her drive into school the black widows baby spiders hatched and were crawling through the little breathing air holes in the container. She pulled over and fled from her car in a hurry. The car had to be fumigated and she’s lucky she didn’t wreck as she didn’t have much time before they were all over her.

JeCrigler, an incident like that might have kept me from EVER sitting in that car again - yikes!

sabbath, that's funny about the survey. Why, oh why, does it not surprise me though?

Dawn- I worked at a school once too and the stories!!!! Once a kindergarten student brought in a giant rusted hatchet for show and tell....uh that was comfiscated within about one second.

When I was twenty I worked in a small upscale china and crystal store. My manager was a very proper older Danish lady who always dressed impeccably and carried herself in a sophisticated manner. She also played favorites, and I did not receive that designation. I remember she gave Christmas gifts to her two friends while I stood there and was ignored.

One day Lily came up to the front of the store carrying two Waterford wine glasses. We had just finished unpacking a large box, and while talking to us, she decided to perch on the edge of the box, thinking it was full. The flaps folded in and she fell all the way in with her legs hanging out and the two wine glasses held aloft. It looked like she'd had one too many. She couldn't get out of the box on her own so I wish we'd left her in there.

I worked in a large organization in the early days of internet and mass email communications. We had a couple month's fun "replying all" to over 10,000 people with a single click.

Not exactly funny to me because I live it but many friends and family get a chuckle. We are in a one story building, there are 5 suites also know as condo's in this area. We are at the end. Recently the unit next to us (we share one common wall) was sold and a new business went in. A crematorium and they specialize in obese people. Not fun to me, I feel and hear when the furnace goes on. I don't see a stretcher or a body, that gets loaded in the back but I do know when the furnace goes on and because they specialize in obese people the burn time is very long as in 8 hours. It is really making me rethink my employment here. I'm not happy in this situation. Go ahead, laugh. Everyone does.

Marilyn- that made me laugh out lol!!!

I worked in higher education for years, directly for the CEO. One day a student (I'll call her Jane) came stomping to my office, demanding to see the CEO right now. Jane was probably 35 years old and clearly upset. She stayed 10 minutes, behind closed doors, then went on her way.

The next day, the CEO told me Jane's story. Jane had been seeing one of our faculty members (I'll call him Dick) on the sly. She was in his class. Dick was married, but apparently had made all kinds of promises to Jane - my wife doesn't understand me, when the semester is over I'll take you with me and we'll move away, yada yada yada.

Well, Jane had been standing outside Dick's classroom, waiting to go in, along with several of her classmates. Another woman (I'll call her Sally) confided in the group that Dick had been seeing HER (Sally) on the sly, told HER that his wife didn't understand him and promised HER that when the semester was over he'd take her away with him, and yada yada yada. That's when Jane immediately came to the CEO and ratted him out. I guess it was OK with Jane to have an affair with her married teacher, but not when Sally was doing it too!!!

The rest of the story: Dick, who was apparently a very busy boy and a real Dick, was gone within the week. It wasn't funny at the time, but it is now. Can you just imagine Jane's face when Sally was telling her story? Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

Years ago I worked for a publisher that put out directories. There was a data entry clerk that was unable to properly key the word "public" - it always came out "pubic". Good thing we had good proofreaders there. Also we had a bio card come in where the subject put down his profession as "therapist". But when he wrote it he had a pretty good space between the "e" and the "r". I took it to my supervisor because I thought he should be reported. Boy was I ever embarrassed.

Well sort of a work story that happened to a co-worker...but I guess more of a NYC story. He was going to a meeting in the city and was on the sidewalk waiting for the light to change. Standing next to him was a bag lady. A limo pulls up to the curb and a Japanese man rolls down the window and says, "Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to the UN?" She hollers back, "You found your way to Pearl Harbor! You can find your way to the UN!"

Such funny stories!

Marilyn- what is a filly foal?

ritaweeda,... got a flashy 5x8 postcard from a ski shop announcing end of season sale. with the card, you were admitted to a "private" sale on certain date/time. without the card you had to wait for the PUBIC sale!

sabbath7- a filly is a girl horse. A foal is a baby horse. A filly foal (as opposed to a colt foal) is a baby girl horse.

Yes, colleenoz is right. The mare had a female baby.

Marilyn, literally laughing out loud. And no one to hear me or repeat your stallion story to. DH is already asleep.

Grocery store customer service: Lady wants to return a turkey. Says she cooked it 24 hrs in an open roaster and it's the dryest, toughest bird she's ever eaten. Must be a bad bird she got. (A customer service manager told me that one)

My favorite doctor story...I guess it's at work for him so it fits.

I was getting a physical and my doc had me sitting by his desk, going through the list...any headaches? blurry vision? and so on, and I'm rattling off no, no, no. Then he asks if I have any heaviness in my chest. I answer, "Yes." He looks at me and I look down at my chest and say, "2 lbs, each side." He glares back at me and says, "I mean do you have any difficulty breathing." I was like, uh-oh, sounds like someone is having a bad day.

So then comes the physical part of the exam... listening to the chest, the heart, palpating the abdomen and then he gives me the breast exam. He says, "Un-huh....un-huh." I say, "Is there something wrong?" He says, "No. About two pounds, each side." I was laughing so hard I almost fell off the exam table!

One day as I was leaving work for the day, I was approached by a well-endowed woman wearing a skirt and matching jacket. She asked me where the HR offices were located. I was very uncomfortable as I spoke to her, but tried to act 'normal' as if this was a common occurrence. She wasn't wearing anything under the jacket which was wide open.

The next day I asked HR about her and was told they never saw her, but that it sounded like she wanted to show all her assets.

Our school had live snakes in a hallway display case. One day the snakes escaped. They searched for days looking for the snakes. Eventually they found them lying on a hot water heater.