DADDY'S TEN RULES OF DATING Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk, you'd better be delivering a package -- because you're sure not picking anything up. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter's body, I will remove them. Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys your age to wear their trousers so loose that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open-minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place. Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, having sex without using a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex with my daughter, I am the barrier and I am the one who will do the killing. Rule Five: It is generally understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only answer I need from you on this subject is "Early." Rule Six: I have no doubt that you are a popular fellow with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway waiting for my daughter to appear, even if more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful like changing the oil in my car? Rule Eight: The following locations are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff t-shirts or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks' homes are better. Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me. Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. The voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car. There is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

It is not just the dog- it is how the dog is taken care of that makes the outcome a good/bad experience. If the dog just has a backyard, goes to a park often- that isn't fair to the dog! Dogs need to have their minds exercised also! Learning to walk like a civilized dog would be a good start. If you are unable to teach the dog this yourself then go to an obedience class/trainer. Great Danes are huge dogs- but they are suited well t apartment/condo/city living IF they are regularly exercised, have a active social life(yes- a dog needs a social life, too)- have an outlet to learn and have physical activity. Letting a dog 'run' on acres of land without interaction/training by the owner is just as bad as having a dog in the city and not doing anything with it. How many, many dogs do I see dead on the side of the road- then hear the owner say something like' I didn't want him to be in a place where there was a fence'. That owner didn't want any responsibility- just wanted to 'forget' the dog, essentially- not have to 'do' anything. Or out here, where it is still legal to shoot a dog that is loose in the country- the dogs aggravate sheep or cattle- the farmer's income- then the owner just can't understand why the farmer shot his dog...BECAUSE when the dog runs/bites/kills the farmers sheep/cattle, the farmer loses money, that's why! The bigger question is- how much do you or your daughter want to spend active time with the dog? An Aussie will be happy in an Agility class- that is a place where this dog excels! All dogs take alot of time- if you want a well behaved canine citizen! They aren't any different than a human kid. Yep- you hit a sore spot with me- people who want an animal then don't want to take proper care.....

Went through the same thing with my DH daugther. but she was 6 or 7ish at the time. Its understandable. She feels now she is competeing with you and is expressing it like a 13 year old. Dont let it bother you. Always keep open communication with her and your bf. Dotn think too far like having kids now. Keep dating and live together , take it one day at a time. More important. You and your Bf have to be on the same page and stick to your relationship. His daughter does not dictate your time or how you date your bf. You are the adult.You are in control with your BF. Let him speak to his daughter, let him keep at it with her. You keep your cool and at her age, the teen years she is also going through alot of emotions. Give her space and give her time. If she acts out during vacation let her father deal with it. Dont let it get you down. When she acts like a baby, then leave her with her dad to deal with and you get out and enjoy yourself. You make sure you show her that her behaviour is not nice and that it wont get your down. She wants to behalf nasty then she will have to deal with the consequences. My SD doesn have text messaging and i wouldn't accept it either between me and her. Just gives her power and i do not let her have any since now adays she is being rude. She's a teen:) Thats how they are. Deosnt matter if they are biokids or stepkids or adopted kids...its the age! But it doesn't mean you have to put up with it. Stand your ground and you keep telling her how you feel. BUT if she gets a rise out of you being hurt then you ignore her tactics and say its a wonderful day and your are soooo happy. :) There will be many games , and many ups and downs..i'm sure she does like you . She just needs to adjust and really understand that she doesn't have to be threatened by you. This is what it is. She feels that now that her dad has someone, he wont be as close with her even though the times of seeing her haven't changed. Over time you will prove yourself with your actions and words. Be friends but if she resists..don't force it. you can only be friends with her...not her mother. So if she doesn't want to be friends with you..its ok. I told my SD...if she doesn't want to be friends that's fine with me. I have alot of friends. But you be respectful towards antoher human being..if not..the door is there. Swing both ways..I dont care who you are related to.

I find myself in a 'similiar' position. When I met my husband, he was upfront that he had no children, however he was with a young woman 12 years ago, 16 years now that became pregnant during their relationship. They were in a a rocky relationship. He didn't speak badly of her but just said it wasn't a good relationship and then all of a sudden came a baby. My husband was 23. The young lady was 19. He was with her through most of the pregnancy but close to the end, the relationship could not be saved. He moved out. She called when the baby was born. He went to the hospital and asked for a paternity test. (I don't begrudge him for this, he had walked in on her during the pregnancy with another man). She refused the test. She told him he was not the father. He told her when she changed her mind to contact him. He went on with his life. He called her a few times and was told by her mother they would file harrassment charges against him if he contacted them again. So he left her alone. He worked at the same school district where he had been working for the next 12 years. She never contacted him. Well I did some research (on my own) and I found the girl. I posted about this. She looks identical to my husband. I know in my heart this is his daughter. But at this point in her life, what good would it do to barge in And start using the 'I'm your daddy' phrase? He agreed she does look like him and his grandmother. But he doesn't believe she is his because he really believes her mom would have filed for child support or something. I used to worry about this all the time. What if she contacts us? What about our children? What about our future children? What about my child that is his stepdaughter? And what about my in laws? They were devastated when they found out they weren't really going to have a chance at being grandparents to this baby. As time went on, I have stopped dwelling on the what ifs. Sure this girl may show up one day but I can't waste today worrying about tomorrow. She is almost an adult at this point and who knows what she has been told. What she thinks. Where her mind is and her feelings along with emotions of not having a dad in her life. It's possible she HAS a dad in her life. She might have been raised by another man. It's just not worth dwelling over. I agree with mkroopy-- there are so many other factors that can be involved here. No one knows. My husband is an excellent father. He is an excellent stepfather. But 16 years ago, he didn't know that he could file for a court ordered paternity test. Well honestly I dont think he could. The laws have changed so much. He wasn't in a financial position to wage a custody battle against this you g woman. If it happened today, I have no doubt that he would pursue every legal avenue to make sure that he has the right to be a father to a child that might be his. But 16 years ago? I don't think he knew or had the ambition to go forth on that circumstance. He changed into a different person after that. He lived a more 'careful' life. He didn't put himself into that position again. He grew from that situation and became the man he is today. People grow. People change. Just as they can become 'bad' partners and become our ex's. They can become better people from the mistakes they make. I don't worry anymore about this child that may be my husband's. I can't worry until the day my doorbell rings. Then ... I'll be back posting about adult stepchildren that are distant and hateful :)