husband suddenly into "swinging"
Jody F.
7 years ago
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Lost husband suddenly
Comments (5)It might make you feel better to know...no you aren't alone. I lost my 55 yr old husband 2 months ago to a massive heart attack and I too had the guilty and regretful thoughts, that too is normal. It's also normal to feel lost and crazy we all go through it. Remember you had been a couple and now you aren't, let yourself cry. Crying is very healing, don't let anyone tell you any different. I felt the louder I cried the faster my grief would go away...but it doesn't work like that. I have found if I hold in the tears I find I end up crying harder later. Don't worry what anyone may think, cry cry cry. I went to dinner with a girl friend to a restaurant my husband and I went to frequently and I told her I might cry. She told me to cry then and not to worry what anyone may think. I did cry a little but held most of it in, but when I got home I bawled like a baby missing him so much. By seeing a grief counselor I have learned I have to put those feelings of guilt and regret (which are usually high expectations we set for ourself) behind me so I can move on, though you can't imagine now how you ever will. If you aren't already writing your thoughts and feelings in a journal you may want to start, even if you just write what you did that day in letters to your husband it really helps because over time you will see what it is you are really grieving for. Two months later I am grieving his companionship and decision making, a month ago I was grieving the loneliness. Take good care of yourself and take one day at a time, truthfully this helps. At first I had problems asking people to do things for me, now I don't know what I need either so it's hard to find something for someone else to do. But think of something even if it's just taking out the garbage can to the curb each week or cutting the grass. I live on a long drive way and I've worked it out with my neighbor that I will put the garbage can at the top of the driveway and when he puts his garbage can out he will come and get mine for me. He has on many occassions said he will do anything for me but I have to ask, he isn't going to impose himself on me. Think of things your husband used to do and ask others to do them for you. I'm finding I spend so much time doing the things he used to do I don't have time to do the things I want. Be kind to yourself Hugs...See Moremy dog's toe is suddenly swollen - she can't walk
Comments (70)I do hope you took her to the vet already. My dog had a swollen toe, which I didn't think was a real problem since it didn't affect her walking or seem to bother her at all. I had taken her to the vet for other things and they noticed the toe, but didn't seem too concerned of it, so I figured they would know and left it as just another in a long line of benign bumps she'd previously developed. It became a natural part of life for months until it suddenly turned dark and made her limp, at which time I panicked and took her in. My deepest nightmare and regret... Even after they surgically took the toe off, she developed Mast Cell cancer from it. The surgery was too late and killed her about a month later. The kicker here is that once the toe turned dark, my vets relayed of their having heard of many other dogs getting Mast Cell cancer from swollen toes before and that if ever a dog had a swollen toe you should just take it off and not chance it, because even if it's benign in the beginning, the chances are it will turn later, and probably too late. These are the same vets that noticed it earlier and didn't say a damn thing! I'm angry and frustrated and just don't understand. I miss my girl terribly and feel I truly let her down. I know I was in denial and should have investigated further and not just count on bumbling doctors not paying attention or simply not giving a damn. I think I was afraid of knowing due to not being able to fix it, but this was fixable if caught in time. Please do not allow this to happen to your baby. You'll regret it forever. I do. My heart aches terribly from it all. I will never forget my beloved baby girl and pray I reunite with her in the ever-after when my time on this earth is done. God knows it would never be Heaven for me without her....See MoreSuddenly very worried I've bitten off more than I can chew!
Comments (7)Quick and dirty lesson: Water based finishes add no color. Most go on milky looking before drying clear. Oil based finishes add an amber tint. This shade is so common many folks miss it when water based finishes are used. Polyurethane is a form of liquid plastic and chips easily. Very difficult to repair (refinish) when chipped. Shellac and lacquer are terrible finishes for kitchen cabinets as they are very susceptible to water stains. That leaves varnish. The elephant in the room with varnishes is most water based varnishes are polyurethane. The oil based varieties add that amber tone, but are much easier to apply and repair. So, water based poly varnish seems to fit your conditions best. There are many brands and several methods of application. Wiping varnish is available, as is brush on, roll on, and spray on. Wiping varnish usually takes six or more applications to provide the same protection as two applications of brush/roll/spray on types. And wipe on is difficult to use on moldings. The major thing to do when buying wood finishes is to buy from a real paint store or a wood working supply store, not a home improvement or even hardware store. You will get a fresher product and better advice. You can get MinWax products at Sherwin Williams paint stores, but SW has a better product, in my experience. And, read up on applications methods, like grain raising before finishing and when to sand and what sandpaper to use. Lastly, practice, practice, practice. Best way is to buy some boards(lumber yard) of the same species as the cabinets. Ok, insides. Using a water based finish on the insides of the drawers is fine. Using an oil based finish is a really smelly for a long time mistake. Insides of the boxes is not necessary. Iron on tape---go to a woodworking store(or on line). They will have several kinds, iron on and self adhesive....See MoreSuddenly, I cannot comment on any thread on the forum! Help?!
Comments (7)I'm sorry to hear of your issues and I'm not going to be of any help, but just to say I have the same problem, occasionally not always, using the Microsoft Edge browser in Windows 10.. I can type into the box but there is no green 'Submit' button, so I exit out and use another browser, however, like now, there is no issue and I'm using Edge to submit this. So intermittent for me on this browser... ...I do hope you get in resolved, but also puzzled as to how you've managed to start a thread alright, you would have to submit that, are you using a different computer for this thread? ...as an emergency interim measure, if you are able to send someone a personal message, then I would be most happy to copy and paste any response you want to make, on your behalf, if you cannot post on a topic yourself... you would have to send me a p.m. with your message - just thinking of a roundabout way of helping you out here.......See More
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