Mid-Life Crisis Anyone?
Annegriet
7 years ago
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Marilyn Sue McClintock
7 years agoAlisande
7 years agoRelated Discussions
Mid-Life Identity Crisis
Comments (10)Oh Howard, you could never get my nose out of joint! Ha ha! Well, maybe if you smacked me w/a bat! Good thing you live far from me!! Your 1st plant looks within the range for E. purpusorum. 2nd, yes a cultivar/hybrid of E. p.~ I've not seen. Last one, E. pulidonis (no 'v') does look similar, like it could be in the mix. Neat-O that your E. pulidonis has the "raindrops" develop on it!! I selected E. purpusorum as one parent because of the look of xGraptoveria 'Amethorum', which has E. purpusorum & Graptopetalum amethystinum as parents, retaining the ridge on the back (underside) of the leaf from E. purpusorum. Julie's plant is retaining the pointed tips as well. I believe the other parent would have to be a light-colored one & have the red flowers. If her plant had a definite red edge, I might lean toward the E. pulidonis as a parent. Still, need to find some red-flowered guys....See MoreAnyone here have their garden wild life certified?
Comments (9)Roselee ~ I was just going to say the same thing: going trough the process of completing the application helps you identify your habitat's strengths & weaknesses. My primary weakness seems to be water. Carrie ~ The current application (at some point) says that a majority of the plants need to be native. They even say "your region of Texas", so my Vasey Oak wouldn't count since its a West Texas species. It seems the Best of Texas that Ty linked to is in conjunction with the NWF. There's also a Certified Butterfly Habitat through the Texas Discovery Gardens that has similar requirements....See MoreHis Mid Life Crisis...I am going crazy
Comments (36)Turkeytrott: There was a sentence in what I wrote that has been bothering me. It did not come out right and I want to re-word it, to express my thinking here. I wrote: "From what you have written, it sounds to be as if he is so bored, and unhappy, and yet he is still with you". I worded it wrong. What I am trying to say is that you are in a long term marriage. In a long term marriage, people can become bored by familiarity. The lack of newness. It does not necessarily mean that the people themselves are boring. It simply means while people may find comfort in the familiar, they can also become bored. It sounds to me as though you actually have a good marriage, as he says he is content, the snuggling, the kisses, but it sounds as though he is so restless, and yearning for new/different but could be staying because he knows what he has is good, and he doesn't trust himself enough, and fears that he may be totally blowing it and lose you in the process. I think of that song that sings about love... "You don't know what you've got till it's gone" and perhaps that is the fear that keeps him from really chasing after this elusive life he thinks is out there...somewhere. I think of the women that I have read about that have been unhappy in their marriage. Some had an affair and left their husband for the other man. We hear that once her ex-husband found a new love, and either married her or moved in with her, and her children started attaching to this new "mom figure" that she had serious regrets. Or her new marriage was not what she thought it would be and she realized the enormous mistake she had made. Perhaps you can talk to your husband and tell him you understand his restlessness. His boredom. His thoughts dancing with the possibilities of something/someone new. What can you two do that could shake some newness into this fragile time in your marriage as children go off to college and he sees the excitement in their eyes of youth, before reality like mortgages and responsibility weigh people down. And he yearns to feel like that again. Start with a great makeover. It will help you feel good about yourself, and he will see you in a new way. If you need to lose weight, do it. Whiten your teeth if they need it. It can take off years, and make your smile light up a room. Change your clothes style, and address your bedroom style, (bedding/drapes/paint color) to make it fresh and appealing. It will make you feel good every time you walk in your room, even if he leaves. I wish you and your children the best. Re-read my last post, and see if anything within helps in any way. Do not sit idle. If you can't get him interested, or if he has already left, start making the changes for yourself! Take a deep breath, and there are books on the market about women who have discovered gifts in the midst of the sorrow. I am sending a hug and encouragement your way. I wish you blessings in the midst of it all....See MoreMid-life crisis?
Comments (29)Holly-Kay, I can so relate to what you say. One thing I've learned in my MBSR class is just how close the sadness is to the surface for me. Some of it is related to the fact that my entire immediate family is gone, as is DH's. It's been especially hard as 3 deaths were by suicide. The hardest though was losing my Mom with whom I was so close. We also don't have any children so there's no vicarious offset of enjoying their "coming of age" activities be it birthdays, graduations, religious events, etc. I remember being a child and people raving about how wonderful childhood is because you have no worries, and I never understood that at the time. Now that I'm older, I realize it's because you are not emotionally scarred at that age, like you are when you are older. I think that, no matter how old you are, it's hard to say goodbye, and as you get older, there are only more goodbyes to say. One thing I've found is that, when I was working, I didn't have to deal with all that emotional stuff as I was simply too busy. My life distracted me from it. Now that I'm retired and have more time on my hands, the distractions are less and the emotions are more apparent. Rather than try to suppress and distract myself again, I want to face into them and learn to deal with them...thus the MBSR, the meditation, the spiritual introspection. The good side of retirement, however, is there is a lot more time and freedom to redefine yourself. There is time to tend to things like purpose and meaning and spiritual activities. There is a chance at rediscovery...of who you were, who you were meant to be, and who you are going to be. How wonderful that we have the capacity to redefine ourselves...each day being the first day of our life yet to be. Each day brings the opportunity to find our way home to ourselves....See Moreldstarr
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