arcy, that really makes me sad to hear. Food is so much a part of culture and being a social being that it seems like those kids are missing out on more that just a healthy diet.

Without really planning it, we are one of the few families in our social group that still does most family meals together - altho it gets harder as the kids get older (17 and 12). It's just something my DH and I grew up with and continued in our home without real intention. My 17 year old can cook and does occasionally but, right now, it is not something that she really likes to do and so avoids it. She does eat out a fair bit when left to her own devices. My 12 year old loves to cook and often makes meals for all of us. Even when I start to cook she will kick me out of the kitchen and take over (not that I'm complaining). I'm glad that both my kids can cook, but I can see that in a hectic world it would be one of those things that gets left out of a kids education.

I find it sad that even things like potlucks and snack days at work have, in the last 10 years, seem to have also fallen victim. Instead of people bringing homemade, more often, I find, contributions are store bought or catered.

Well, this might have been the case had both my daughter not become vegetarians! I have all the family favorites in a index card recipe box. They do from time to time ask for a recipe that they remembered, but usually desserts or salad type things.

Up until this year, we've been fairly successful having family dinner almost every night. With four kids active in sports, this was tough and sometimes meant eating later than I'd rather. This year, though, dd17 has a job, so works usually 2 school evenings, and then with my other three kids' sports practice schedules and dh's work travel increasing this fall, it was difficult to eat together. I still make a point to have dinner on the table and whoever is home eats together, but I'd say on average, we only all sit down together twice a week. None of my kids ever make dinner, unless you count boiling pasta, or making a meal for themselves, such as a panini and warming up soup. I have involved them in the process on occasion (like help me make chicken Parmesan, etc), but none have ever cooked a meal start to finish for the family, partly b/c they don't have time at that time of day (working on homework or off at sports). They all do make breakfast foods like eggs, pancakes/waffles, etc on their own. They are more than capable of making something to eat for themselves using ingredients I have on hand. I think they all have an interest in cooking tho dd17 prefers to bake.

i was at a party once and one of the woman said she never makes dinner. I asked if her husband liked to cook and she said no. So I asked what they did for dinner and she shrugged her shoulders and said, "eh, sometimes they just have buttered noodles." She has three girls- 11 y/o twins and a younger one. I think it shocked the few of us who were standing there b/c we all like to cook and are always sharing recipes with each other.

I grew up with family meals nightly and my mom was the "you'll sit here until you eat everything on your plate" kind.

I've always cooked 6 nights a week(Friday is my night off!). My DH and I believe in family meals, although it was difficult with sports schedules when my kids were in middle and high school. I have the pickiest DS. He had issues with texture from the time he was a toddler and just refused to eat most foods. I ended up cooking separate foods for him(mostly chicken nuggets and grilled cheese). I never thought I'd be 'that Mom'. He is now 21 and still a very picky eater. When he is home from college, he rarely eats with us. He mostly goes out for fast food or orders pizza. My DD is 22 and enjoys cooking. She loves veggies and prefers them to meats, but is not a vegetarian. She rarely eats with us when she is home either. She eats on her own schedule which is nothing like our schedule. I'd like for us to eat together more, but just try to enjoy their company when they are home.

Growing up we sat down for a nice meal nearly every night. My mom enjoyed cooking. Sometimes my dad did not get home until 7, and I would be starving! Still, we always waited for Dad except for the evenings that he had office hours (he was a doctor). I tried to keep this tradition going in my family but my ex did not often come home for dinner and I was left with two boys who did nothing but battle with each other. Neither liked the same food. It was not pleasant and cooking for them was a chore. However, we always had a nice Sunday dinner and all of us sat down together. Both of my sons grew up to be very good cooks and cook for themselves most nights. Funny how things turn out.

How incredibly sad, but I've seen that myself all too often when our kids were growing up and brought school friends home here to play and for a meal. Some had never even had homemade soup. Ever! Only from a can. Sit down family meals were rare.

Me, I followed in my awesome Mom's footsteps. Sit down family dinners in our dining room Sundays through Thursdays. And, in front of the TV on Friday and Saturday nights watching a movie together and eating pizza, burgers, etc. Weekend family breakfasts every Saturday and Sunday at 9AM. No electronics allowed ever. And DH and I not only involved both our kids in the actual cooking on a regular basis, but I taught them healthful meal planning, how to grocery shop and budgeting, too.

I was determined not to send my someday-to-be-adult kids out into the world unable to take care of themselves in a good and healthful way. And, thank goodness they both could!

Two nights after DD went back to school after Winter Break her sophomore year of college, her sorority house caught fire and burned. The girls were moved into furnished campus apartments in groups of four for the remainder of the year. Almost none of them knew how to cook more than microwaving frozen meals, let alone how to plan and shop for their own meals. But DD did, and proceeded to teach many of her sisters. DD and 3 of her sisters have been renting a house right off campus these last 2 years, and she's attempted to teach them, as well. But they unfortunately seem more happy to just eat take out and junk food. Great girls, but lazy when it comes to cooking and eating healthfully. Sad thing is that they can't understand how they've all gained 15 to 20 pounds in the past three years. Duh!

We grew up with a 6pm evening meal, pretty much set in stone.

For our family, with plays and sports and such, we try for 6:30pm and sometimes eat at 7pm. Until about a year ago, when she retired, we had a chef grocery shop and cook for us Mon-Thurs.. We miss her as much for her wonderful company as for her cooking (totally from scratch, mostly organic and on the lighter side). From when the kids were little, she bought them all their own aprons and knives and they were often pressed into service as "sous chefs", which they loved. On the weekends my kids would cook with me as well, especially things they like like waffles, or pancakes or treats, but they also "invented" some of their own dishes and have their own specialties. One kid loves to make saffron risotto with homemade chicken broth, another invented her own apple/almond/spinach salad, and my son likes to make brownies or rice krispie treats and his favorite is insalata caprese from the garden. For Sunday dinner we often take turns and each kid will plan a menu and help me make it. My DH often get stuck with the most stressful part ... grilling fresh fish or meat . Keeps my kitchen cleaner and one less thing for me to worry about.

When I was in middle school, my Mom would let my sister and I make entire meals. I am sure some were awful. Thinking about it, I am too much of a control freak with my kids and too much of a perfectionist. I should let them cook more and be more open. Even as I am typing that I am grimacing. Old habits die hard.

I grew up with sAHM and a culture that took great care with food; we cook a lot and eat dinner together as often as schedules allow. My MILworked throughout her children's growing up years, and that was a lot to do, working and cooking. She doesn't not enjoy it much (it's work) and her kids didn't learn much about cooking or foods. My sister made it a "thing", every time we visit each other, to have my kids each plan and it a menu and cook it with her help. They are so proud and definitely learning a lot of skills. They have been doing that since the kids were single digit ages.

This is one of my goals for 2017, to get my kids in the kitchen with me more. We rarely eat out, and I spend a great deal of time planning, shopping and cooking meals. My kids are active and so that's a factor but the main culprit is me: I'm kinda a neat freak in the kitchen, clean as I go, and have certain ways of doing things, from frying eggs to chopping carrots. I have some pretty quirky habits and need to get in the right mindset to have people in there with me. I think we'll need to sit down for a therapy session first.

Lynn, that college weight gain is something I want to ward against, too, with my kids. I hear about it from concerned moms. That "freshman 15" is real.

Lisa, you sound like me in the kitchen!

czarinalex said - I grew up with family meals nightly and my mom was the "you'll sit here until you eat everything on your plate" kind.

I grew up similarly with the twist that we knew the only things to eat were on our plate. There were no invitations to fix a PBJ sandwich if we didn't like dinner. With the exception of liver, which my brother could not eat, we cleaned our plates willingly and gratefully. Dinner time was 5:30 when Dad got home and 6:00 if he was not home yet. He and Mom had an agreement that he did not need to report in if work was delaying his usual 5:30 arrival and we would eat without him at 6. We also did not have foods Dad did not like (broccoli, cauliflower and tuna noodle casserole come to mind). We liked them so Mom saved those foods for when he wasn't going to be home for dinner.

We all sat at the dinner table Sunday through Friday. Dad usually cooked dinner on Saturday and it was a meal that we could individually plate/eat when/wherever. Good especially when we became involved in teen activities and dating.

I did the same with my family and with my son during the single mom years. We always ate at the table except Saturdays when the TV trays might come out. Takeout food for dinner was rare and was usually a dietary splurge on pizza. My son started cooking at age 10 when he would prep and I would finish when I got home from work. He worked his way through college as a cook (and sometimes as a chef). Unfortunately, his family rarely dines together unless it's at my house. He and his wife have widely varying palates and levels of health consciousness, and the 4 and 6 year olds only want sweets, bread, fruit, fries and nuggets, which DIL accommodates.

Yes, Mtn, I suspect our kids on a similar forum some day claiming how we stunted their culinary growth.

I don't have children but the college students do like to cook in general. Many of them are athletes or former athletes or otherwise health conscious, so they tend to want to cook and eat healthy. Although, I will sometimes see them eat fast food, too. I also work with nutrition/dietetics students who also naturally gravitate towards cooking.

I find it refreshing to hear there are those out there like ran my home. My three knew where their butts HAD TO BE at 5:30 every night. Mine were "theater" band kids so somehow their rehearsals were most often after dinner, so we made it through those years w/o losing our family meal. I am anxious to see what they carry forward. Growing up I knew to be home before my dad got off work so we were ready to eat when he arrived. It is very sad what my students endure. Many do not see an awake parent until the weekend. When adults work ever revolving split shifts at the local factory family life goes out the window, it seems.

Lisad, I'm very much like you in the kitchen. I have to start cooking with a clean kitchen, sink emptied of any dishes, DW cleared out so dirty ones can go in, etc. and then clean up as I go along. Too much clutter around as I cook drives me nuts. And mess - though I try to be more laid back, especially when my girls are baking, and there is flour and sugar all over. Dh will just go in and start cooking in the middle of everything. And if I have some paperwork on the counter, he won't move it then proceed to splattered meat juices, etc. He makes me crazy! I like your idea of getting your kids more involved this year-I'm going to try that too. Mine are very comfortable in the kitchen making single things for themselves - like boiling water for pasta, making a grilled cheese, making eggs, etc, but a full meal?

As for my own childhood, my father worked for the federal government and in those days, you worked very specific hours, plus he was in a carpool. He left the house every morning at 6am, and was home by 4:30. Dinner was at 5:30. We then all watched the CBS Evening News with Walter Cronkite every night together. Fond memories of that! Arcy, you are lucky you were able to have dinner at the same time with your kids every night. Mine have practices all over the map and the h.s. coaches sometimes change practice times the DAY of practice. Their practices are not consistent and change week to week - we get a schedule, if we are lucky, on Sunday evening for the following week. Some practices are 4:30-6, others are 7-9pm. My younger two kids have practice right at the dinner hour 6-7:30 and 5-6pm. And when my dd works, she leaves at 5:45. And b/c they are running around, they don't like to eat before practice, except for a snack after school. So, we do the best we can, but I do insist that all meals are at the kitchen table and the majority eat together if it's not possible to wait for everyone to be home together. Ah for the simple days of my own childhood when everyone was home at the same time.

I make a homemade dinner about 5 nights a week, but my college age son, when he's home, is here for dinner maybe half the time, and 15 yo DD does gymnastics every night and is gone from 4 to 9 pm. Her dinner is reheated and waiting for her when she walks through the door, and unfortunately she eats alone while doing her homework. Not great, but it is what it is.

My mother worked and made a meal, from a recipe, every night. We hardly ever ate out or got take-out. She enjoyed cooking; I didn't inherit that trait! I'd have cereal every night if I lived alone.

I also grew up in a family who gathered for dinner at the table each night-- it was *very* rare to eat in front of the tv. We rarely had processed foods or packaged starters. I remember being envious that my friend would have tv dinners, rice-a-roni or hamburger helper! Lol.. can you imagine being envious of that?! The only processed meal I remember eating as a kid -- fish sticks during lent!

I did a LOT of the cooking for the family from an early age. My mom had 4 of us in close succession and she was ill for a lot of our early years. I started making full meals around the age of 8 or 9. They weren't fancy, of course.. but I became very capable in the kitchen from an early age. One of my favorite meals was the hamburger, tomato and macaroni dish someone mentioned as her DH's bachelor meal! I also made stuffed peppers, meatloaf, chili, sloppy joes (without manwich!). We also had our fair share of what I consider 70s meals.. chicken ala king, cube steak in tomatoes and peppers, beef stroganoff, etc. We always had Sunday dinner-- usually a roast of some sort, potatoes, veggies, gravy... and when I was still swimming competitively, we always had a large breakfast on Saturdays before meets.

All 4 of us were very involved in sports and other activities. As I approached high school it was harder and harder to gather for meals. Still, my parents made the effort to gather us whenever possible. We did have fast food.. but it just wasn't something we did often. Nor did we dessert often-- only on special occasions... but I do have special memories of making popcorn balls at Christmas and doing fondue (dinner and dessert) for New Years.

2 of my siblings are only just now coming into their own as cooks.. my brother and I were always good cooks. Almost all of the kids cook.

Over the years I had tangles with a number of bf's around the evening meals. Much as I will eat in front of the tv when alone, when dining with another, I much prefer sitting at a set table-- preferably with flowers/centerpiece. No tv. No newspaper. No books or tablets. My recent ex had a very difficult time with this.. he was a very good conversationalist but at meals, he just didn't want to talk. Growing up, he and his 2 siblings often ate different meals at different times. He just had no sense of a communal family table.

I haven't read all the replies yet. I was fortunate enough to have two very different and very good role models for cooking....my mom and my mil. I've never worked outside the house and enjoyed cooking for my family. I probably leaned a bit more towards my mil's style of cooking because of my husband but I had plenty of my own style and cooked many of mom's recipes. With the internet, new recipes are just a few key strokes away. My daughter started out using a lot of my recipes but she quickly morphed into a healthy life style and cooking style of her own.

Sueb20...cereal every night sounds heavenly!! In fact, I'm here alone tonight and haven't had dinner yet. I'm having cereal for dinner...right now :)

We always ate together when my children were growing up - it was just what one did. Both children (now in their 40's), are great cooks. Unfortunately, my daughter travels a lot for business and often gets home very late, but her husband is a SAHF and he cooks got the boys. Occasionally, squash practice gets in the way, but sit down meals are the norm. Eldest DFS is the world's prickiest eater, but DGS2 is quite the cook - very adventurous and very much a gourmet at 14. On weekends, my daughter cooks.

My son is an excellent cook, but it s now divorced so he only cooks for his children one night a week and on the weekends he has them. Their mother is the microwave prepared food kind, do his are the home cooked meals. He cooked both Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners for them. My 11 yr old granddaughter loves to bake and asked for a KA sr and mixer for Xmas. She's already made two kinds of cookies.

Czarinalex I have one of those extremely difficult to feed boys as well. He has ADHD and also suffers from Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome, a condition related to migraines. He had many medical tests leading to diagnosis. One of his referrals was to an eating disorders clinic and that doctor explained the the texture issues often accompany ADHD. We have him make us dinner once a month and find that this really helps him be more aware of the food he eats. He is fifteen years old.

Growing up we all sat down and ate dinner together every night and I carried that in to my marriage. I have three grown children who are outstanding cooks, not due to me, but that they all love to cook. Consequently all the holidays take place at their homes now and I'm off the hook finally. Yes, I still cook good healthy food at least five times a week and we supplement salads for a meal on the other nights. My DH says I'm the best cook but I say my son has that honor. lol

Interesting thread - in our family we had family meals until we were teens & then us kids all started making our own meals, since everyone wanted different foods @ different times. We all learned to cook for ourselves early on, not because we were forced to, but because we all love to cook.

OTOH, my dad traveled for business & was often on the road for weeks @ a time. When he was home, he liked us all to eat together. We had lots of family gatherings too, for holidays, etc. & everyone sat down together for those. My grandpa always came over for Sunday dinner & we all ate together for that meal as well.

I grew up on a farm so we ate almost every meal at home. (It was Breakfast, Dinner and Supper(which is lighter, even for the kids who were at school). Sunday dinner was huge at about 4 when we just had brunch after church and dinner.

A restaurant was a treat and I had never had canned veggies or Campbell's tomato soup until I went to college. We did have occasional pizza or Chinese carryout and vacation was a free for all as far as junk.

I made an effort with my young children and marriage to sit down and eat together. It was not entirely homemade but probably 4 days a week of homemade, 2 of a salad with some chicken or protein and 1 night of carryout. My kids had friends who didn't know you could make a homemade waffle.

After I was a divorced mom my kids helped cook and now are really good cooks and the one that is at home(adult) is really good from his college years at ethnic foods and spices I was not as familiar with.

Now it is my 2nd DH and one adult kid and frequent visits from the other "kids" and I would say we do 85% of our meals homemade. We do have frequent family get together's with the extended family every week and those are all based on homemade food. Another 10% is mostly already cooked chicken or seafood and a salad and 5% is eating out.

When I eat out it is total decadence or total junk....and sometimes when I am out on my own I do "sneak" a Five Guys burger.

I wanted to add that for busy working people I think the more important focus is the family dinner time at the table (when you can with sports,etc. I ate many a family meal in a mini van). So if you need to get a roasted chicken or make a Stouffer's lasagna and a salad from a bag that is perfectly fine! Buttered noodles might even suffice every once in a while! but it makes me wonder about a parent who says "they might have buttered noodles". You can buy frozen egg sandwiches, yogurt, fresh shaved turkey, grapes and string cheese to very much supplement that......

jak4, I suffer from CVS and I am sorry for your grandchild!.

DS27 never cooked when he was living at home. He was too busy with school and activities. He's been married for 4 years now and cooks fancy meals for his wife all the time. Glad I didn't worry about his lack of cooking while at home because it all worked out!

Mom worked and made our meals but to this day she never liked to cook. Sunday dinner was always at grandma's. we watched Lawrence Welk, Wild Kingdom and Disney after dinner. I miss my grandfather saying grace. Grandma was a great cook and Sunday dinner was a special time. When I started college I was sad not to go with them. I did make a few and always holidays with them.

When I started 10 th grade, mom worked and also was in school for her master's degree. I could already make pancakes, eggs, cold salads, pasta, anything baked like pies, cakes, pastry. She bought frozen lasagne or battered fish for me to make with vegetables and rice or potatoes for us. I started trying recipes out of the better homes and gardens cookbook grandma bought me for Christmas or birthday. I read it over and over. Then I started collecting recipes out of magazines from the thrift store. I still have those recipes from fancy cooking magazines. Many times we couldn't afford the gourmet ingredients so I substituted. Dad was a champ, he tried it all. He liked fried shrimp and steak and potatoes the best. He still does.

In college, I became vegetarian so mom took over cooking again. At this time I finally got mom to stop using canned vegetables and switch to fresh because of the salt content and dads health. She loves fresh veggies but I think she used canned because it's fast to heat on the stove and you can buy a large quantity and it won't spoil. Back in the 60s 70s, we didn't have money to waste on food going bad in the fridge. It was canned or frozen or something like cereal or pasta that you could keep on a shelf. Mom was so happy with her first microwave. she could thaw meat in a hurry instead of overnight in the fridge. My dear mother, she worked so hard and was exhausted after work but she made dinner every night so we could eat together. Dad never helped. I would help clean up and started helping in the kitchen. My sister did not and mom never asked her to. Sister does not like cooking but when her son needed a special diet, she learned.

The only time we ate in front of the TV was Super bowl Sunday or Breakfast watching Rose Parade. My high school/ college boyfriend ate dinner with his parents at the same time every night and the TV was in the dining room. They watched PBS and nature shows and rarely news if something big happened. They didn't have cable tv. I remember taping National geographic specials on a VCR so I could see them later after dinner. I knew friends who watched certain television comedys with family at dinner and it became a tradition. If I go out to eat and there's a tv on, my guy will get sucked into watching it and stop talking. We do like sports bars for game days or tilted kilt restaurant/ sports bar but the point of going there is watching the game.

These days I'm mostly vegetarian. I don't eat mammals or dairy and eat chicken, eggs and fish lightly. Mom does not want to do Sunday dinner, they do not want to drive here. My sister has her hands full with her son's special diet and eats what she makes for him. Dad does not like either of our health cooking and prefers what mom has always made. I started taking mom out for lunch once a week. She loves it. The only time I get to do the big family dinner is the holidays. I go over and help mom or they come here or to my aunt's 1920s Tudor in Pasadena which is large enough for the extended family.

I was in a vintage shop looking at linens. Someone said to me young people don't want linens, china, sterling and so forth for the table because they didn't have family dinners and mostly eat out anyway. What they inherit, they give away.

Ok I just read the whole newlywed thread. Maybe canned veggies were popular in the 60s 70s. I thought it was because mom shopped once a week on Saturday. She made many of the ' newlywed meals ' for us. She also served the iceberg lettuce, carrot, tomato, salad with dinner. Our meatballs were always Swedish meatballs.