I can't comment on the models you are considering, but I have two. One is a Summit in my breakfast bar that has a very soft hum when it kicks on. We don't sit near it, so it's never been an issue. The other is a SubZero in DH's bar in the family room that is totally silent.

Secondguessing, welcome to THS and a big hug to help you get through the day. I disagree with castiron, BTW. You are desperate for outside opinions and we don't know you or or DH, so there is no need for anyone to be embarrassed. People who are totally healthy get overwhelmed with a renovation. I can't imagine remodeling my parent's house, especially if I had fond memories. If you own your house full and clear, and own the house you are remodeling, you can take your time. If you do not have the funds for the remodel, I would ask your DH if he prefers to put it on hold for a while. If your DH blew up about $2k, it does not sound like he is comfortable with the projected cost of the remodel. Note - they always go over budget. Is your DH retired or is he also working full time? That would make a difference. My DH was once totally stressed out over a job that was more time consuming that expected. This was back in 2000, when it was easier to get a job. I recommended to him that he quit and look for something else. He did and was very grateful. Sometimes men need "permission" to back away from something. Do you think your DH would simply stop the remodel if you were OK with that? Saving his health and your marriage seems like it would be more important than the remodel. Best wishes, whatever you decide.

My 10 year old SS is also standoffish and shy and keeps to himself. He does this to everyone and has since he was 4 years old. That is his personality and that is your SS personality. As well my ss does have low self esteem issues and he does blow up at times as well. But he blows up at his mother and father. WHne he does run to his room screaming and crying its usually me who has to calm him down. I dont think you did anything wrong and asking your husband. It concerns you but i wouldn't let it bother you so much. THis is your SS personality. What i would do though is watch him closely for outbursts and be prepared. Its obvious he has anger issues towards his own mother. Not you or his father. Is he seeing a councilor after his outburst with his mother? Are you planning ot have children? As for him being more quiet...how about asking him for help in wedding plans. I got my Skids involved with suits, picking colors, picking flowers..chekcing on the internet for me. It turned out to be alot of fun and they felt their opinion counted. And it did cause they were part of my wedding and i wanted to know they'ld be happy with styles and colors they were going to wear. The thank you cards afterwards had all of us. My husband , me , his kids in a photo which i sent to 120 guests. And my SD speech at the wedding made the entire hall be in tears. So you know...there are days i'm angry at her but there will always be ups and downs in any relationship. This will happen with your SS and since you know he's the quiet shy type i wouldn't push him. I didn't push my ss and still dont. You cannto force any relationship and yes the ship has sailed but if he's told your husband to be that he likes you....then dont push anything more. Your husband should just reassure him that he's part of a new family now.

DD is not DH's biological child. She's closer to DH than her own father. DH was supposed to begin counseling with me but since he's on the road for work so much, he's never been able to attend my appointments. He is supposed to be in town the next two weeks so I'm going to have to call the therapist and beg for an emergency appt. In the meantime, grandparents and BM are pulling crap with DH about SS's return. We just got a message from BM that SS isn't coming back tomorrow as planned but rather she has been in contact with the grandparents who have SS in another state right now. She said it was ok for GPs to keep SS and BM expects DH to pick up SS on Tuesday night, which is 2-1/2 hours away. DH is furious. I asked DH tonight before all of this happened what his intentions were about SS. He said he's going to tell SS that this is not a game we're playing and if SS wants to go live with BM, then that's fine, but should he decide after a week or two that it was a mistake and he wants to come back, that it's too bad. He also said that he doesn't intend to try to trump any offers that were made by BM to get SS to move in with her. I told him that it wasn't an option for us right now to be trying to buy a child.