No.

Please, no.

I don't even like "man cave", and sure as heck wouldn't encourage a feminine version of same. ;-)

I think in many homes it's the kitchen, bedroom or sewing/crafting room.

Don't know about you, but I have positive associations with certain small womb-like spaces. In fact I recently decided to move my bed into a little 6 x 10 nook under the slanty ceilings of my 2nd floor. It may have been at one time a walk in closet or a nursery.. I should clarify that its not dark or the least bit claustrophobic but the opposite, has a nice good sized window for gazing out in the morning at the treetops and opens up to catch a breeze. Just very COZY with the slanty ceilings

A coworker has mentioned having a Ladies' Lounge.

It's the garage. :)

For some reason "kitchen, bedroom or sewing/crafting room" made me cringe. I guess I don't see this as equality, but stays too rooted in past roles? My son sure gets upset when he sees cleaning commercials targeted to women-"Can't men vacuum?!". If I had to pick a room, it's the garden. How is that a room ?

;)

Since I enjoy spending as much time with my husband as possible, and we have very few friends since we only enjoy socializing with people we really care about, the idea of a man cave is a foreign concept to us, as would a female cave. We've had so many great discussions sitting on the couch together with our laptops, finding things of interest on-line that we can share with the other, enjoying our kitty who is usually there with us, that I wouldn't have it any other way. I love gardening and growing antique roses, and so, like rob, think of that as my room. I wouldn't have a garden without my husband, who has done so much work to bring it to fruition, but the daily tending is my joy and my time alone. But, everyone's different, what fits one does not fit all by any means.

I love the "she-sheds" ..https://www.google.com/search?q=she+sheds&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiCjMbnvK_LAhUE5GMKHToODvoQsAQIUw&biw=1013&bih=663#imgrc=_

My husband has floated the idea of a PMS hut. I'd be into it. He makes sure a small bag of chips, red wine and a chocolate bar magically appear in our house at the right time each month.

When I hear of a man cave, it always seems to imply that the man only is allowed to have a say in the contents of ONE room and the rest of the residence belongs to the woman who keeps it clean and decorated. She's very bossy! It's not a flattering stereotype for either gender.

I once jokingly called our media room "the man cave", and DH asked me to please never do that again. Even he dislikes the idea of a stereotypical hangout meant for a grown man to watch sports, drink beer, display his trophies, and scratch himself.

I agree with Fori. Our home is just that: Our home, and it's a labor of love that we are both creating.

In my house it would either be the office or the bathroom, where mommy is not to be disturbed!

i'm with no please no. Woman cave - sounds like something someone would call their V.

LOL, local!

Sometimes known as "mom central"

When we remodeled last year delays caused a timing issue with our tried& true painter so we got a quote from someone new. The new guy made a few comments while going through the house that made me wince inwardly, but I tried to keep an open mind. When he came to our TV room, which has traditional decor, he said something like, "Ah, here's the man cave!" That term just rubs me the wrong way. Fortunately, our regular painter was able to work us into his schedule. Whenever I spot the other guy's logo on his van I think - Mr. Man Cave!

Add me to the list who doesn't want a She Cave, Girls' Den, etc.

"she space" - I've seen a few instances (bloggers, magazines, etc) where females are making a space of their own. In some instances I've seen/heard of a "she shed" backyard sheds fixed up for the lady of the house.

I suppose the gender neutral equivalent would be the "away room" noted in the The Not So Big House. You can count me among those who benefits from such a concept of having a personal, private space to re-group. The rooms that are enjoyed communally in this house has decor that generally results from a bunch of compromises. I think that I would treasure having a space that I could decorate in a way that reflects the uncompromising side of me, that I could experiment in and spend time in to nourish me. I would have no problem with my husband having such a space and I I would not really care what he called it as long as the autographed picture of Troy Aikman stayed in there as well as the Star Wars posters.

i think it's interesting that the "she space" suggestions are devoted to working; sewing, crafting, gardening (the shed idea), etc., while the man-cave is devoted to relaxing, watching the boob tube, gaming and other things that don't benefit or further the family, but that provide the man with down time.

I'm all for either gender having an away space, but when mom's is designated as a place to work and dad's as a place to relax, that's kind of a throwback and another unflattering-to-either-gender stereotype.

Our library is my space, although DH is welcome in it and we use it as a public room. It's just away down a short five steps at one end of the house out of the main traffic. He, otoh, has an "office" downstairs that I don't enter unless I have to, and I have my own office in another wing of the house. If I need alone time I close the door door of whatever room I am in and he always knocks.

I have a friend that uses one small room in their house as a reading room and she has feminine decor and whimsical art that she appreciates but her does not. She keeps some of her craft stuff in that same room. She has a beautiful chair to sit at and she says that sometimes it is nice just to go somewhere else and sit. It is not to divide the genders but rather a place to decorate and have to herself without infringing on his senses.

I went to a model home recently that had a "Mom Cave" as it was called by a sign on the door. It was on the second floor, small room furnished with 2 comfortable chaise chairs. It also had a small TV, wine fridge and built in bookshelves. I loved it! I remember in our last house complaining to my husband that he had his office, our boys each had their own room, but I had no place to call mine and only mine. As an introvert who cherishes privacy (and has little to none) I would love a mom cave no matter what it is called! I'd like a lock on the door too please!

Mine is a "Ladies' Parlor."

It's all girly-girl in pale lavender and lace with a 70+ year old dark oak floor. It has a large book case with books on gardening, birding, military history, prairie history, crime detectives, sewing, crafting, cooking, etc. It houses crafting projects, sewing and quilting projects, binoculars for bird watching, small chairs, an antique chest-on-chest, folk art, and someday, a TV/VCR hook up for movies only.

I love my room!

The kitchen in my family is NOT the "female cave", and never was so, even when growing up. Both my father and my brother Love/d to cook. This is in response to the much earlier response on this thread. Dad cooked awesome meals in our family kitchen, and my brother was far the superior chef over his first wife, who thought canned nuked dinners would be sufficient to sustain their family. He's now partnered with a wife with whom he can share this love of cooking fascinating foods.

The kitchen is the HUMAN cave.

I am a "she" who lives alone in a small but comfortable home. No woman cave needed--the whole place is a cozy get-away! YEAH!

lakeaffect, I think some man-cave ideas are centered around woodworking space, which isn't simply relaxing... but I get your point.

I'm building my future home with my OWN (yes, I'm female) woodworking space, and stained glass working space. We will see how this develops.

According to wikipedia......

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man_cave

My late husband and I were never into the naming of rooms other than their purpose. He had a music room and I wrote in the library. We had a bonus room with exercise equipment, sofa and a 2nd tv to watch while exercising.

We also had a garden room (inside the house), but it was named so because it overlooked our cottage garden on the south side and our waterfall patio garden on the east.

I have a one-car garage here at my 1939 house. I had planned to renovate it into something functional since it's very narrow for my VW Sportswagen and too narrow and too short for my 4-door Tundra gardening truck. I ran over time and budget on the house, so I've postponed for a few years to see if it lures me into some creative use.

For the last 13 years and three houses I've had "my retreat". Until this last move it was always furnished with a small modular sofa, antique chest of drawers, Asian screen, oriental rug, sofa table, book case and beautiful art work. A truly lovely space where I could duck out to read a book, stay up with a movie on my laptop or do late night busy work without disturbing anyone; and sometimes even entertain my lady friends away from the rest of the house for those private "girlfriend chats". We sized down this year and instead of the sofa now I have a small daybed in my retreat for when my lady friends come solo for a visit, but it is still very much my "get away" space and a delicious luxury I wouldn't dream of giving up!

I feel like DH and I have to spend enough time apart at work, why would I want to hide away from him at home? I think the implication of a "man cave" is that "the old ball and chain" takes over the entire house and the only place a man can "be a man" is the "man cave". That's just one reason I despise "man cave".

How about a "boudoir"?

Wikipedia: Boudoir

My attempt at a "woman cave" flopped. The moment I finished my very own cozy writing/sewing/reading den, my DS proclaimed it was the best hangout for his sleepover parties. Apparently, antique marble-topped vanities, vintage leaded glass chandeliers, lots of books, oriental rugs and "Peach Butter" wall paint strike just the right chord with high-school boys.

Then my own parents requested that their sleeping accommodations to be made in my "boudoir" whenever they visited us. Of course, I complied.

I always thought the assumption of a 'man cave' was they needed a space to decorate w/o female input. A place no female would WANT to have to look upon. This made me think most of a home is done to the wife's taste but I can see the point made above-compromise wins out over all. I am not sure how a space all my own would be decked out. Recently I came across a set of table linens that I ADORED but had no reason to purchase as they were nothing that would blend in among my current accouterments in my home. They reminded me of how I decorated my first very own bedroom back in jr.high,yellow gingham, bright, cheery, fun, carefree. That bedroom would not feel congruent against my skin anymore. I am not sure I would LIKE what would.

In the victorian days, it was the drawing room...

During the American Civil War, in the White House of the Confederacy in Richmond, Virginia, the drawing room was just off the parlor where C.S.A. President Jefferson Davis greeted his guests. At the conclusion of these greetings, the men remained in the parlor to talk politics and the women withdrew to the drawing room for their own conversation. This was common practice in the affluent circles of the Southern United States.

Or it could be a morning room I suppose, though I always think of those as being used more during the day.

I have my reading nook in my bedroom and I have a sewing/craft room. DH has his study and he has his workshop and barn. But I think, while we've defined spaces for our own activities, neither of us feel such a strong need to have a space without any input from the other. We work together so well on these things.

I was cracking up this a.m. as I've gotten rid of some stuff on his dresser top and he was complaining that it now looks too bare and needs more decorating! This from my engineer husband! I guess nearly 38 years of living with me has had an impact!

But please, do not call it a woman cave for so many reasons....

So we can't call it a parlor (it's based on the French word for talk) if it's a place of silence and solitude?

And it in the South (I'm fully Southern), women withdrew to the drawing room to remove those petticoats, relax and let loose! Absolutely the truth!

My husband has the basement room where he plays poker and keeps all his guitars and amps. It is his happy place but he hates the term man cave. I don't think I need my own womanly area but I do love having my own bathroom (well, the guest bathroom).

I think for me too it's the term itself that's so off-putting. It's not really the fact that a man has a separate space where he enjoys spending time, but "man cave" calls to mind something kinda gross and juvenile. I'm not really sure why I have such a strong reaction to the phrase!

Linelle, that is so sweet. What a nice testament to the man you loved so much. (((((Hugs)))))

I loved your story Linelle and went through similar feelings after my first DH died.

My DH spends his daytime hours in his garages and I spend my hours in my library. When he comes down for the evening I move into the living room with him.

I still feel the need to have a space where I can be alone. I have my home office but if I go in and close the door I have two cats and two dogs whining or mewing to come in with me. I need a place to go where I can work on my art uninterrupted, and our home just isn't cut out for it inside. I have been subtly hinting about having a studio built where I could spend an hour or two each day without interruption. So far my hints have fallen on deaf ears!

This thread reminds me of Virginia Woolf's A Room of One's Own.

House.

Minus the man cave, if there is one.

When we were looking to build, a guy kept calling a space "mom's office." Smoke literally poured from my ears as I scratched out the "mom" part that kept creeping in to drawings. Truth be told, I am currently the main earner and have a real study or office as I telework a lot. My husband teleworks, but mostly from the couch as he doesn't have the need for a desk, monitor, printer, or book shelving to do his work. Regardless of my particular circumstances, the whole label gave me the shakes.

This has been an interesting discussion. Not sure why the term "man cave" has so many negative connotations. My SO and I created one when he moved in with me, in one of our guest bedrooms. The term was funny and enjoyable for us to use. My SO's bedroom at his previous house was called "the cave" by his family because the walls are all dark wood paneling and he has light blocking, red and black curtains, and dark wood furniture. His favorite colors are red and black. He has trouble sleeping so keeps that room practically hermetically sealed. I jokingly accuse him of being a vampire. He's introverted and likes to have a place where he can retreat away from the "sturm und drang" of the household. I tend to give rooms in my house nicknames anyway. We never got around to replacing turquoise carpet or trim in the master bedroom, and I disparagingly referred to that room as "the aquarium."

On the other hand, I got to have total reign over the other small guest bedroom, which had a pink, red, cream, light brown and green color scheme. I got to use my old doll crib to store guest towels in without my SO gagging! It has floral art on the walls, which I guess is totally emasculating, or at least so I gather by the reaction of my SO. (I'm joking, this is a gross exaggeration! He would just say it isn't something he cares for and I know lots of women don't like floral patterns as well.) I'm a botanist, what can I say . . . And I got to have some WHITE furniture in there!

We are moving into my folks old place eventually, and we've had some interesting discussions about our new digs. We're going to re-create the previous decorating scheme, I get the smaller guest bedroom, and he gets my dad's old "man cave" extra bedroom which was where my dad got to go watch his TV programs and had his messy office before my mom died. The house has a "sitting room" off the main entrance, which I am dedicating to my mom, that's where I am going to put her favorite pieces that I inherited, and then SO and I will get to work together on the family room, dining room, kitchen, screened porch and master bedroom. It's going to be an interesting ride. Anyway, for us, each of us having our own space to decorate as we wish helps solve a lot of problems in the common areas. I get to indulge in all my light colored frilly whims, and he gets his dark, somber retreat. We could call it his "office" because I also have an office in the house, but "man cave" is a fun term for us. Not sure what my room will be called. I used to call the old one the "girly room" but that is sexist, I suppose . . .

I would love to have a sewing room and did in our big family home. That house was just too big once the boys moved out so now I have a large space in the master bedroom, which really is supposed to be a sitting area for the room. I keep it very tidy because I cannot stand to see a mess from the bed!

When we redid the kitchen, it was all about me. I designed it, with help from the kitchen forum, and my husband and I built it. I love to cook and my husband loved that we could make a space for me to do that.

Last year my husband and our sons built a very large garage on the back of our property. I helped side it and painted it, but I didn't get involved in the layout because it really is his space. He sometimes jokes about his man cave, but he really considers it a space he shares with our sons.