Don't look now, but I think a banquette may show up in my kitchen! :)
Lavender Lass
9 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
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I don't think I can be a stepmom any more
Comments (8)This is a very tough situation to be in. It is very disturbing to hear of the sexual abuse and the dead puppy. If I were you I'd be very concerned this boy doesnt have alot of contact with your young daughter. Unfortunately many abused victims do in turn become "abusers". Seeing as though you have tried counseling and everything and nothing is getting better,I can understand how you feel about wanting him in foster care. Can I ask...did it come out in counseling that his mom sexually abused him? If so,then have charges been pressed against her? It sounds as though she has had alot of men around too,and any of them could have abused the boy also. Of course your husband may blame himself.He feels he should have protected the boy from this ever happening. Still,my number one priority at this point would be making sure this does not happen to your daughter. You never said how old the boy is? I also do not see how DFS can tell you that you cant spank your kid. As far as I know spanking is not illegal. I'm so sorry that being a stepmom has turned out this way for you. I think for our own biological kids to do things like this is bad enough,but when step kids do it we feel more powerless in the situation. Is there a grand parent,or a aunt or uncle the boy could stay with? One that maybe does not have children who wouldnt mind being a sort of MENTOR? Hopefully you will get some more great advice from others in the forum. I can mainly only offer my sympathy......See MoreI don't think my stepmom likes me...
Comments (49)I am trying. I will prob. take a break from it today. I have posted enough today. My first step mom had an affair on Dad. She ran up 75,000 in credit card debt. She ended up marring the guy she was messing around with. Dad put a private eye on her and they had photos of her in a hot tub. When his lawyer pulled those puppies out, her jaw dropped. Her lawyer was like..um..er..we need to talk in private. And she still got 15,000 bucks. I called it the 15,000 bj. Poor Dad. I don't want to see him get burned again. She was 18 years younger then Dad. Dad was like..I made a mistake, a man and women should not be more then 15 years apart. Then he marries a girl that is like 22 or 23 years younger then him. I was confused!! So I have had two step moms that I have had a tuff time relating too. Things could be worse. I know that. Remember when I told you that she asked me to leave Dad's house on xmas day. She could not put up the xmas tree. It's now April. I was like..why can't she put up the tree. Dad has allways kept a clean house. She told me that she could not walk into the sun room and look at the tree because it reminded me of her. My sis says that is a copout. She has probs, and I am the cause of them? She told her shrink that. I don't buy it. She may have probs, but I am not the cause. But I guess she has to put blame somewhere. Heck, she was the one that asked me to leave the house. She said.." i will kick your ass if I find out that you are telling either family or friends about me." Why, does she have something to hide? Is she paranoid? She is on meds and seeing a shrink. She says that is all because of me. I'm just trying to make sense of it all....See MoreI'll bet you think I want help with my layout, don't you...
Comments (27)Lav: It's just that fridge and big sink on that wall seem to eat up all the countertop. Plus, the fridge needs like, 4" minimum clearance against a fixed wall... I wish that wall were a little longer cause I'd love to have the fridge to the left of the sink like that. I always seem to want to prep to the left of the sink. I don't know if I can change that habit, can I? I get having a prep sink closer to the stove, but this copper sink is made for prep with the cutting board that sits on the ledge and the drain tray. Not to mention that after what that thing cost, DH will probably throw up if I mention getting another sink, lol. Bellsmom: I was told that having the whole wall open is a problem with structural stuff. That's why DH wants a rustic railing with upright beams in part of the opening. I can't tell exactly but the island makes the walk around about 30"... seems too close to the step down for safety? Rosie: Your words are food for thought. I am definitely a sink/window prepper. I tend to live in front of the sink for some reason. Don't really see myself doing too much between the fridge and stove (in the original layout) And, as I said above, I tend to want to work to the left of the sink. Angie's idea is very appealing though. I like the smaller area to cook in and less walking around. I like the fridge out of the main area, so anyone can get something without, 'excuse me'. The one thing DH does is make adult beverages (killer old fashioneds for those familiar with Wisconsinites) and we're always in each others way when that happens. I thought a bar sink over by the window could double as a kind of prep sink and I'd have mondo storage over there, too. But, it does close up the room somewhat, at least for traffic, but maybe not in a bad way. Idaho: thanks for the info and I was kinda thinking that empty corner could be a safe cubby or something like that. Keep our Cracken in there, lol. Marcolo: are you saying to leave the fridge as it is in Angies plan? I'll have to play around with that configuration, too. Thank you......See MoreI don't think I'm happy with my backsplash :/
Comments (72)Have to agree with the above - it looks on my monitor that all of the backsplash tiles read green/blue and the countertop reads grey/brown and none of them seem to work together. The fireclay tiles posted by eam44 would look to be a much better match. I disagree above that you need some kind of focal point. I think it's a smallish kitchen and has lovely pendants, and windows and island and a bold backsplash is just competing with that. Keep it simple! In fact, i was the above writer who earlier said they pretty much always dislike the inset backsplash and i think your current BS is a perfect example of how those insets rarely look good. Even when the underlying colors are similar, as yours are, there's just something "off" about them. I think the only exception is when they are using almost the same tile (like, carerra subway tile BS with a carerra herringbone pattern inset). I still think this is busier than i like, but isn't an eyesore as so many other insets are. I think this inset mistake is actually a good opportunity to replace the whole thing!...See MoreLavender Lass
9 years agoLavender Lass
9 years agolast modified: 9 years agoHere's the plan....breakfast area is about 9' x 9' with built-in hutch. Laundry area/pantry is to the right of kitchen, entry below (opposite fridge LOL) and living room is on other side of range wall.
MamaGoose and I were joking that you WANT to see the fridge in a vintage kitchen, right? Big improvement over that icebox :)
Lavender Lass
9 years agolast modified: 9 years ago
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