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To visit or not to visit

9 years ago

About three years ago, after many instances of being treated rudely by DH's son and DIL, I made the decision to disengage from them. I have encouraged DH to continue to visit them, I just no longer accompany him on these trips.

What makes this difficult is DH's daughter and granddaughter moved to the same city as her brother (about 2000 mies from us). I get along with DH's daughter and I am very close to his granddaughter. I have been able to see her by flying her back here on her Spring Break; we have met DH's daughter and granddaughter in other cities while vacationing. But, I have not seen her in the city where she now lives.

Recently, the granddaughter has been stating she wants me to come out with her Papaw to see her. She has more than once said, she wants us all to be out there together, to be together as a family.

My problem is, I do not know how I can visit my step-granddaughter and DH's daughter while at the same time avoid DH's son and DIL. There is no way DH would travel 2000 miles and not see his son and fantasy is it would all be very awkward...I hate to disappoint the step-granddaughter and I really DO NOT WANT to be any where near DH's son, not after nearly 20 years of rude and down right mean treatment from him and his wife...really struggling with the issue of does my love for my step-granddaughter trump self-care in regard to DH's son?


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