Trin, Sending good thoughts and prayers for her. I went through the lumpectomy and radiation 6 1/2 years ago, so I hope that she will be as fortunate. The one thing that helped me was following the diet they gave me after the surgery. It said to have lots of good quality protein - eggs, chicken, turkey. I can't remember what else. The diet helped me heal quickly. I'm sure that they will give her good advice. Another thing that helped me is that I started swimming when the surgeon said I could. Swimming slowly helped to stretch the chest and arm muscles.

Thanks everyone. Ruthie,i'm doing pretty good,thank you.Mostly just the usual aches and pains from the neuropathy,and the side effects of the meds,but i try not to let it get me down. Just went for a stress test thursday,they wanted me to actually walk on the treadmill,which i didn't think i could do because of the knee problems,however i did it and the dr said i did good!! So that's another blessing!!He put me on Lisinopril an ace inhibitor. When they did the muga scan b4 i had chemo they found my left valve was running a little slow,so the cardiologist has been keeping an eye on it.Other than that my heart is in good shape,he says. And you Ruthie,how are you doing,i think of you often as well and several others that have been fighting these battles. Take care everyone and have a great weekend. Kathi

Nancy, Just read your post, sorry to hear of your loss. I found a beautiful poem that may be helpful for your scrapbook or just as comfort during the holidays. I have to share it with you. I found it on one of the forums here last year. Hope you like it. My first Christmas in Heaven I see the countless Christmas trees around the world below With tiny lights, like Heaven's stars, reflecting on the snow. The sight is so spectacular. Please wipe away that tear For I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year. I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear But the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here. I have no words to tell you, the joy their voices bring, For it is beyond description, to hear the angels sing. I know how much you miss me, I see the pain inside your heart. But I am not so far away, We really aren't apart. So be happy for me, dear ones, You know I hold you dear. and be glad I'm spending Christmas With Jesus Christ this year. I sent you each a special gift, from my heavenly home above. I sent you each a memory of my undying love. After all, love is a gift more precious than pure gold. It was always most important in the sories Jesus told. Please love and keep each other. as my Father said to do. For I can't count the blessing or love he has for each of you. So have a Merry Christmas and wipe away that tear. Remember, I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year. This poem was written by a 13 year old boy who died of a brain tumor that he had battled for four years. He died on December 14, 1997. He gave this to his mom before he died. His name was Ben.

--" my nephew is kind of over the anger, he is doing great in school, he is managing his mental health with medication but with behavior modification he is doing excellent. I'm so proud of him."-- Good for him! It sounds like that no matter the chaos and mess around him, he at least is doing 'ok' and working hard at overcoming his own issues. It is strange though that your sister assures he get help and therapy yet does nothing to deal with her own issues. Ever watch that tv series on hoarding? OMG is right. I won't even begin to think I understand hoarding behavior, cause I don't, but I wonder if the moving/partner to partner lifestyle of your sister has somehow helped create the hoarding tendency? Perhaps she views the total mess and junk in her house as the one consistancy that belongs to her and the one thing she can control with thinking 'my possessions'. IDK. Such inconsistancies. Poor son has no shoes yet the lady has a housefull of them. No clothing, yet the house is littered with clothing. No food yet hands her money to others for food. Makes one wonder why she did not hand her friend the address for the foodbank instead of the cash. Is the 'stuff' all over her home the reason she is always broke? Meaning she spends her money on all this junk and therefore has none for the things she really needs? I'm not sure there is anything you personally could do to 'help', it seems like professionals with training to deal with people with these issues would be the only hope of breaking what is going on. Has your nephew talked to his therapist about his living conditions? Is there a school counselor that might be able to assist him? A sink full of dishes would not give CPS much room to work with, but a housefull as in unsafe, unsantitary ect might. If you 'rat' her out, be prepared that your sister will be angry with you and perhaps try and shut you out from interfering with what obviously she sees as 'no problem'. I have not a bit of advice, but wanted to say from your 'vent' I think you have real reason to feel concern. I'm just not sure what it is you could do to 'help' all on your own...this sounds like it may be a bigger issue than you yourself could take on without some outside assistance. In the meantime, perhaps you could include your nephew in a bit of your weekend activities (minus Mom) just so he knows Aunt Myfam is there for him and give him a wee bit of a chance to have some normalcy in his life, a decent meal ect. And continue to help out a bit with the little things you have been doing (like the facewash).