I'll bet you are glad you went. It sounds like such a nice get together, with the one exception. Linda

The short answer: No, you don't need to bring a shower gift. A shower gift is tied to a shower you were invited to. If there was no shower, or you weren't invited to one, there's nothing to make up for. You didn't skip anything — the event simply didn't happen on your radar, and that's not a gift obligation you owe. The longer answer, for context: Traditionally these are two separate gifts for two separate events. But that rule assumes two things — that a shower actually took place, and that you were invited to it. Neither applies here. Etiquette doesn't require you to retroactively gift an event you were never part of. A few things worth noting for your situation specifically: You're traveling from California to Maine. That's a significant expense on its own, and any reasonable couple understands that. Travel costs are widely considered part of your "gift" in spirit, even if no one says it out loud. A monetary wedding gift is completely appropriate — and honestly, for a nephew you're close enough to travel cross-country for, it's a generous and welcome choice. Don't double up out of guilt. Bringing an extra "shower gift" to the wedding itself would likely just confuse the couple, since there was no shower to attach it to. It could even read as an oddly large wedding gift rather than a thoughtful gesture. If you want to do something extra, a nice card with a personal note means more than a second gift. Something about welcoming your nephew's new spouse into the family, or a memory from when he was growing up, lands far better than an extra box. One caveat: If it turns out a shower did happen and you simply weren't invited, that's a different situation — but even then, the polite response is to let it go, not to compensate. Being left off a guest list isn't a debt you owe. So: bring your wedding gift, enjoy the trip, and don't give the shower question another thought. Hope the wedding was lovely, Vicki — and if anyone else is in a similar spot, feel free to share how you handled it!

*sigh* All men should wear tuxes....they just look soooo darn handsome! Best of luck to the Bride and Groom. Their wedding party looks beautiful!

Marie~I love the layout of the colors!! How could I not?? Thank you:) What did you use for the backing? I opened this thread on my iPad & your quilt is absolutely gorgeous on that screen and I said, those are 'my blocks!' then I read further. I am flattered that you liked my BD block & color choices to make such a special quilt. You really have made my day! I agonized over choosing a block & the colors last year-it was my 1st BD blocks to participate, and I really did not know how or what to choose. This is what makes joining in the BD Blocks so great (not to mention the fun of receiving blocks!). Good Luck in school - and thanks again! I hope they love it.