Payton, I'm very sorry for your loss. I can relate to what you are going through. I just lost my mom on January 1st of this year. She was a young 50 years old, and suffered a horrible painful death due to Scleroderma and Pulmonary Hypertension. Basically, she couldn't breathe anymore, and her lungs and heart failed her. I just turned 23 years old a few weeks ago. Life sure does seem unfair doesn't it? We are so young to have to endure this kind of pain and emptiness. The only thing that gets me through it is having faith in God and the love of family and friends around me. No matter how alone you feel, you are NEVER completely alone. There is always someone else out there going through a similar situation as you too. Unfortunately death is a part of life that we all must learn to deal with. My mom was my best friend, and sadly I realized just how much she means to me after she was already gone. I wish I could have told her that she was the best mom in the entire world and that I am a good person because of her. I would consider myself to have been a good daughter, but there is so much more I wish I would have done. I took for granted that she would always be there for me, and that she would never dieat least not for another 20 or 30 years. God had other plans though. You and I both need to realize that no matter how much we did, we never would have felt like it was enough. I guess it's hard to repay the person who gave you life and loved you unconditionally like no one else could. This journey of grief you face has only just begun, as has mine. However, I choose to believe people when they say it will get easier. Not a day goes by that I won't think about my mom or miss her deeply, as I'm sure this is the same for you, but with time maybe we can learn to cope with their passing. I think losing one's mother is possibly the hardest thing to go through, so if we make it through this then there is nothing we can't handle. When I feel really sad sometimes, I try to remember how my mom would want me to be. She wouldn't want me to stop living my life and be depressed during the days I have left. She would want me to make her proud and be a good person, and that's what I'm going to try to do. Treasure the memories you have with your mom, and never forget how much she loved you. She knows you loved her too, and wouldn't want you to feel any guilt. One thing we can be thankful for is that our moms' arenÂt suffering any longer, and they now have the most beautiful heavenly bodies. My mom couldn't handle anymore physical pain, and I'm grateful she doesn't have to be trapped inside that failing body anymore. I selfishly want her here with me of course, but she was too good of a person to endure so much pain. Remember, someday soon we will join our moms' again, and be reunited with big hugs from them! Try to make her proud everyday, and remember it's okay to cry too. We will always miss them, but death isn't the end. It's just a temporary separation until we join them again on the other side. Take care and remember you are not alone. You will get through this and always keep your mom's memory in your heart. She may be gone, but her love for you will never die. I wish you well, Lisa

Vickey-MN, my feeling is contrary to that of so many. To me, true friends are far more important than family. Sharing a gene pool means nothing if they are slimeballs. Sometimes the gene pool needs some chlorine and you're just the person to give it what it needs! You know right from wrong and you have not only the courage to stand up, but actually HAVE stood up for what is right, even to your own detriment. I first said "possible detriment", but changed it. You have been damaged. I know how it hurts you to take sides against your family. Oh, how I know the conflicting feelings. I'm sure you've shed more than a tear and had some sleepless nights over this. I'm sure you've had an upset stomach or something too. Doubtless your blood pressure doesn't need the strife. But I also know how good you must feel knowing you're doing what's RIGHT. And that takes guts that few people have. What really makes me respect you Vickey-MN, is that you don't just take a quick view, form an opinion and go off on it. You've agonized over it, you've considered it carefully. You've rationally reasoned out that there's other possibilities. You've weighed the evidence and made a calm and logical decision. Not a lot of people do that. Though we have never met, I feel confident that you are doing the right thing. You're following not just your mind, not just your heart but both coupled with logic. So, hold your head high. Stand tall, be proud. You are a rare person and one of which this world sorely needs more. Not just a hug here, but a pat on the back to ya! I know that what you're going through is not easy. But hang in there. You know you're doing the right thing. You wouldn't do it otherwise. And your friends know you're doing the right thing too! Have a great week and don't let the stress make you forget to change your clocks!

Cremation is permitted in the church but its not a common practice and actually it is frawned upon. In greece the bodies were never embalmed. You are right about that being a dessicration but canadian law will not permit a person to be buried without embalment. Therefore we have no choice in that manner. And family will not cremate. Its an insult to be burnt. In greece they do not embalm. The body is washed and many many flowers are place inthe coffin above the coffin around the coffin to mask the smell of decay. The body is buried the same day within hours for obvious reasons. And depending if you are part of the 'old' calendar or 'new' calendar, cremation will not be performed unless its specifically asked for and you attain permission from the priest of the church. As for cremation i do personally find it insulting and disgusting BUt this is because i was raised in having burials as open caskets. But my husbands family cremates. And after seeing a few funeral i've become acustom to it and actually find it less tense than a greek funeral. I'm sure when my husband finally participates in a greek orthodox funeral he will be disgusted himself and shocked. There is nothign wrong in stating that something disgusts you. Lol..the fact is that you still have to respect someones wishes. If they want to be cremated . that is their wish. If they want a closed casket and buried this is their wish. That is all I do not have to be educated. I am educated with 2 degrees in biology and work for cancer research. I worked with many cultures and many beliefs that i do not agree but i wont bash someoen about. If you think i came across liek this then its disappointing but its your views. THese SD wanting for their stepdad to be buried. Not cremated. He didn't state otherwise and since his family has estranged him and considering these girls were dishign out the cash as well i think they are entitled to bury their loved one the way they see fit. They just feel threatened and disgusted why their stepdad's brothers who wanted nothing to do with him while he was living would have the balls to ask for a death report. Andif it was for genetice purposes than they should state it but its reason is obvious and its for money. AND THAT IS DISGUSTING! DISRESPECTFUL.

Even when a loved one has some health issues and we have it in the back of our mind that there may be life-limitations ... it is so hurtful when death comes, especially when the loved one is a house-mate. I send my condolences, with prayers offered that you and family may remember the good times together and that they may help you find peace in your hearts during these next stressful days. (((((Kitty and family))))) ole joyful