Unbelievable up date on daughter

16 years ago

Daughter was transfered yesterday afternoon to Montgomery county from DC. I was not notified but found out when we called dc to check on when she would be transfered. This morning at 9:00 she appeared before the police comissioner and was released without charges. She is gone again. I have to accept that she has made the decision to not reach out to us. We had done alot of research and had several options to offer her for rehab but she has to want to do it. I am just sorry that we never even had the opportunity to talk to her and offer help. I have to accept this and try to move on with my life. Maybe someday she will want help and if so we will be there for her. Thank you again dear friends for all the love, support and prayers you have extended. Satine

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Comments (26)

littlebit_gw
16 years ago
Bless your heart I can't imagine the pain that you are dealing with. You are right, you can't make her change no matter how bad you want her too..As hard as it it..Just let go and Let God..
You and her will be in my prayers..

Hugs
caroline94535
16 years ago
I am so sorry you are having to deal with this Satine.

As much as you want her to get help, it will have to be her decision.

I have you and your daughter in my prayers, too.
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suzieque
16 years ago
So sorry for this update. You do know that she is alive and OK; you didn't know that before. It must be so difficult to know that there isn't anything physical keeping her from you --- it's her choice. However, there are many, many instances where lives turn around and people are reunited. You and she are in my thoughts and prayers.
sandiefl
16 years ago
Your daughter and your family are in my prayers.
gadgets
16 years ago
That has to be very hard on you, Satine, and very draining on your emotions. I pray that you find some measure of peace in your life so that you can move on with your own life. But I know that no matter what, she will constantly be on a part of your mind.

You are now in possession of the car, right? That helps so that you know you won't have to deal with problems in that arena.

Shirley
janie_ga
16 years ago
sending you a hug!
lydia1959
16 years ago
Sorry to hear this Satine. You gave it your best shot. ((Satine))
bee0hio
16 years ago
((( Satine)))
country_bumpkin_al
16 years ago
Oh Satine..I wish I knew something to say! How is it she is the one in the wrong here..and she gets to run off without a care in the world! It's just not right!

You have my Prayers! I can't even imagine how hard this is!
Holly_ON
16 years ago
Sending a cyberhug..You have done the best you could.
leel
16 years ago
At some point, you have to wash your hands and leave it up to her. If she's over 21, she's an adult and she has to decide whether she want to clean up her act.
joann23456
16 years ago
Oh, that must just break your heart. Just because there's nothing you can do doesn't mean you want to do nothing. I will keep you all in my prayers.
kathi_mdgd
16 years ago
Satine,
I'm sorry you're still dealing with this,but perhaps it's time to let go and let God take over.

I was raising a GS and he started down the wrong path,wrong friends,trying drugs etc.DH and i gave him many chances to straighten up,finally we told him he had to get out,we couldn't deal with his life anymore.He was 19 at the time.

He left,thinking friends would let him stay with them etc,even though we told him that wouldn't happen if they still lived at home with their parents etc.Of course he didn't believe us,"they know everything you know"!!!

Anyway he was literally on the streets for 3 mos,,and it broke our hearts to see it.I would see him sometimes and give him a gift card for mickey D's,never any money though.
Finally after 3 mos he came and asked for another chance,we told him,our house,our rules,and if you can deal with that ok,other wise don't waste our time or yours.

He was a dirty mess,blistered feet from walking so much,of course hungry etc.But he learned his lesson and continued to live here for a few more years with no problems.

He now lives in N.Ca with his GF and son and is a great dad and and BF.

Guess this is what they call tough love and it does work.We all have a great relationship now as well
Hang in there,and don't give in,she may come to her senses one day also.
Prayers and good thoughts to you all.
Kathi
nodakgal
16 years ago
I am so sorry.
I know how it hurts to want something so badly and have it just out of your reach.
I hope in time, she will contact you and you will have that chance to help her!!
jannie
16 years ago
I/m so sorry. I hope she gets her act together and contacts you in the near futiure.
alisande
16 years ago
What a huge letdown for you, Satine. But you do know that she's alive, at least. And perhaps this experience gave her a needed reminder that her family is still out there, loving her.

I hope you receive better news soon.
joyfulguy
16 years ago
How heartbreaking!

I hope that she is safe and not suffering.

I hope also that she soon comes to her senses and chooses a more positive life, before permanent damage is done.

Sometimes we can do something, but it surely is frustrating when there is nothing we can do.

(((((Satine and the others in the family who love her))))).

ole joyful
jkayd_il5
16 years ago
Praying you can get some rest and peace from this worry. I can't imagine your hurt and grief over this. Judy
kacram
16 years ago
ditto to all above.

((((((Satine))))) I'm sorry.
williamsburgjane
16 years ago
Sending warm hugs and special thoughts for you and hoping your daughter will someday soon realize what she is doing.
cbtexas
16 years ago
Its a shame you didn't get to talk to her. Did you sell the car yesterday? I wonder if she asked about the car when she got released. Now her mobility is probably limited and you know she is alive. Did you hire a PI? If you did, at least his search area should be more precise without her having the car. I hope you can get in touch with her an offer her the counceling she needs. At least you try. What she does with the help is up to her. If she refuses,I don'tknow what else you can do.

Hugs to you.

You are in my prayers.
stephmc72
16 years ago
You know, I look at my little girl and boy and wonder what their lives will become and if they will be okay. I honestly cannot even imagine experiencing what you are right now. I am so sorry. I dont even feel like there are words I could say that would seem significant enough.

You've done all you can do. And spoken from someone who has a loved one with an addiction problem (in my aunts case, alcohol), she needs to want help. She obviously isn't ready. All you can do is love her and keep yourself open and available for when she decides she wants to turn this around.

But I'm still so sorry.
chisue
16 years ago
If she is addicted, I doubt she was thinking about anything beyond getting drugs as soon as possible once she was released. I realize it's almost impossible for you to do this, but don't take her actions as rejection. She's not 'all there' now.

I'm sorry for you, and for her.
trinitytx
16 years ago
I feel so bad for you. I know this must hurt something terrible.
You have done what you needed to do. And you can rest knowing she is out there doing what she thinks is best for herself. It is hard to let go, but for now you must.

Big hugs from me to you.

Trin
juellie1962
16 years ago
Oh Satine, I'm so sorry you didn't at least get to see your daughter. I too hope you can get some rest from the worry.

If you ever figure out how to "let go and let God", PLEASE clue me in. I know we're supposed to do that, but my own son is giving me fits, and I'd love to know how to do just that! Best wishes to you and your daughter!!! :)
susanjf_gw
16 years ago
i must have missed a post while on vacation..i've been thinking of you very often..while i'm sadden at your dd's apparent lifestyle, i'm grateful at least you're not in the aweful position of not knowing if she were alive or not...

one can't responsible for their child when they choose to ignore a "family lifestyle" over drugs, of any kind...we've tried for years to reach out to dh's brother, but he likes his beer more than family..his choice...

we finally let go...it took a long time (about 20 years of being ignored) and we're not alone...a cousin who'd tried to bridge us (she asked him to come to a family events)realized he was lying to her as well...

just know you're not alone in this ordeal and you will be continued to be in our thoughts...(((satine and family)))

Unbelievable up date on daughter

Comments (26)

littlebit_gw

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