"my mother would have wanted me to take care of him." see there? You already knew you did the right thing! Take care of your dear father & take care of yourself; he's the one she chose to be your daddy, & you're the next link in her chain of life.

Dear Kate. Thanks for your encouraging words. When I first made this post I said no one understood my grief, I didn't mean the people on this thread of course everyone here dose understand that's why we came here. I cannot talk about TJ without tearing up and hardly can talk. It has helped me in so many ways to talk about him. I have never felt this way about any person or animal. I just can't explain why? This little dog has meant so much to my life and now he's gone, I feel so empty. The person on this site said if you do not have a connection with a animal there is something missing in your soul. Truer words were never spoken I might have been one of thoses people because it has taken me 71 years to feel this way. I have had other animals,Cats, Dogs: None of them has affected me this way. TJ consumed me in a way I have never known with love and devotion. When I would have to go out shopping, my wife would look after him. TJ would not stay in the house he would go to the garage and waite for me to come back, looking through the screen. When I came back he was jumping up and down at the screen he would run out to greet me and lick and kiss me for two minutes at least, that is just one of the memories I have of his love for me. Kate, I read your responce to Mike about losing his Maltese, everything you said to him was just how I feel. I know you loved Homer very much, it shows in evry word you speak. LIFE HAS A WAY OF TEACHING YOU A LESSON...And I learned one. I am 71 years old and retired. I have a wonerdful wife married 52 years and three grown kids who are all doing well. My middle son lives in Alaska (A State trooper.) with his wife and two Boys. My Daughter lives in Chicage. My other so lives in Atlanta, His wife will be having their first child in August. I have more to say but have to get off for now. Charlie.

Thank you all for your advice and pictures. I just LOVE them! After a weekend of being laid up again (fell off a machine at the gym and totally wrecked my back but am finally feeling a bit better now), I am hopingto get out there and prune this coming three day (can you say YEA!) weekend! Still on the fence about my climber as she is throwing out all sorts of laterals right now so this could be a good bloom year unlike prior years. She may have just had to have more time to come into her own. However, I am seeing that there are all sorts of little oak trees and other plants coming up through my rose bushes due to the mulch and birds. UGH! I may have lost my Sharifa Asma because of it if I can't pull them out. I have a feeling my garden is going to be very sparse this year due to a bunch of new roses going in to replace my old ones. Evelyn and Ambridge are reverting back to rootstock, so out they go. I have oak trees growing up in my Sharifa Asma as well as Evelyn, Mary Webb and now one of my Brother Cadfaels! I also have another unidentified bush growing up in my Peach Blossom. So it looks like I pretty much get to start from scratch all over again. Looks like an expensive year!

Hello everybody, Unfortunately, I am having a relapse triggered by a family fight I had today. As I mentioned in my first post, my relationship with my mom is not good and she is very disrispectful with my stuff and has thrown away very special things to me. Things that I really treasured. Today, I picked up a carped that my mom had removed almost a year ago. She wanted to throw it away, but the carpet was in good condition and I liked it, so I took it to a place to have it washed and storaged. Today I finally got it back home and put it behind a wall in my living room. It was well hidden and it wasn't taking too much room. My mom saw it and started acting like crazy and told me she was going to throw it away tomorrow. I got angry and she started telling me that I had my stuff all over the house, which is not true, and then mentioned that the fact I put my little dog's stuff, like his plate and little bones in the laundry room was a problem for her to. This made me get very angry and I went down the stairs because I wanted to make sure my dog's stuff were safe. suddenly, my uncle, who was at home for a visit, stood up and got between me and my mother because according to him he thought I was going to hit my mom, which is a terrible lie. He dared me to fight and I told him I was not going to accept his attitude in my house. Then he asked me to go outside and I said: OK. Let's go. Next, my brother showed up and my mom to avoid the fight. Then my brother told me he didn't want to fight because he was much heavier than me and that it was going to be easy for him. I said: Come on, let0's do it. And he refused it and said he loved me. Ever since my parents divorced he has interfered in many of my family's issues that are not concer of his and sometimes he has tried to act like the man of the house. Today was the last straw and made me lose my mind. He has brainwashed my mom several times, my mom almost always does what he tells her to do and of course, he usually takes my moms side. All this conflict made me have a psychiological crisis and miss my little dog a lot since I feel very alone again and I have no friend and partner at home to rely on. I really didn't need this since I was starting to feel better about the loss of my beautiful Guyton, to heal, to rearrange my life without suffering too much and feel more peace. On top of that, my Psychiatrist took the liberty to show my mom and my brother my diagnosis file after a visit my mom and my brother made to his office, which was a terrible violation to my privacy and to the confidentiality respect Mental professionals have to have. It's the most basic and important rule. Now, my mom is using this as a weapon and threatening me to send me to a mental hospital because my Psychiatrist also told her and my brother she could do that. It is just unbelievable. He betrayed me and put me in a very difficult position. Specially now that I am trying to overcome the death of my little dog and my mind is unstable. It just looks he also took my brother's and mom's side and they are their patiens not me. Now I am missing Guyton a lot again and their loss became bigger again too. I am lost and sad again. I really hope you can reply to me. Thank you very much in advance for your help and kindness