Hang in there! the light at the tunnel is there !
I know its hard but it willhappen. She will move out.
And say NO to her keeping a room at your place and one over there. That is ridiculous. When she finally empties the room out , fill it up, with you stuff. Make it into a library ,computer business room. Have a sofa that turns into a bed for guests.
Do not tell her your plans for the room. Just do it and say nothing. When she visits and freaks out you say' like my new room?' and clearly state if she has a tiff about it that she has moved out and its permanent!
How about taking apart her bed frame and everything to help her along. Since your husband doesn't seem to want to help.
Take it all apart and place it in the van with a few friends. Then turn around to your husband and say " Here dear, here is the keys to the van, deliver all the stuff to your daughters new home"
And that 's it. She has a place right? Its now painted right? So there should be no problem with you sending her stuff over. By all means, you did pack it all up for her to help her right?:)
This way, all the anger will be physically taken out of you and you will be satisfied.
Keep posting! i'ld like to know what happens. Oh yah,. put all her trash in a garbage bag and send that with the van as well. Her first garbage chore for getting out of the house.

LOL about shipping out the trash, too!

You're so right, but let's face it, if I pack up her bed, she'll just volunteer to sleep in MY bed like when our 7 y.o. was a baby - w/ her dad, remember that one????

I found what will hopefully be the last THONG I ever have to lay eyes on, dropped on the floor after she did her laundry, lol. I'm not complaining as she did do her laundry start to finish this time, and by whining about a thong, I seem even older than my 43 years (sorry, they're just NOT for me!), but the mental picture isn't a pretty one. The girls aren't built like supermodels, and personally, I don't even think the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit models look good in the things!

DH said their mom was over at the rental house again. Just hope they don't come back starved again at 10 pm!

I will keep posting. Thanks for the positive vibes!

Dana

Dear Dana, I feel so badly for you! This is outrageous! I agree completely organic_maria. In list the help of friends tear her stuff apart pack it up nice and neatly in your van and hell drive it over there. Tell her as sweetly as possible I thought with your hands being so full with the move I wanted to help you out with this, have DH is the passenger seat and say your dad is hear to help you move it in.

Don't give anyone the option for a NO! Or something along the lines of it's going to have to wait. I personally would give the option of you have until Sunday, this being Monday to get EVERYTHING out of the house, if it isn't it goes to good will or it goes in a garage sale and I keep the money as a STORAGE FEE! LOL oh you didn't tell her your charging her storage on all of the stuff she is keeping in YOUR home, did you? You might want to tell her that one too!

Lol Angel! I think I will slowly but surely flip out if these three aren't out by the weekend.

Last night, when she came in, I was trying to get into a conversation about the move and I was going to say, "Oh, don't bother trying to move your bed tonight - feel free to take it over tomorrow!" like I was expecting her, at 10:30 pm to still move out that night or something. I was on the phone w/ my mother, so the conversation didn't happen, but I noticed her taking my bag of dog food to feed her sister's dogs. Not that it's a problem, but I would want to be sure that it's the same food the dogs usually eat so they don't get sick all over MY house. Maybe that's why they're not moving them just yet?

I am so near the end of my rope. I just want my life back - all this junk OUT from all over and some peace and quiet. I no longer feel as though I want them having the keys to my house, either. I was feelng very charitable a little over a week ago when I believed I was counting hours til they were all gone, not days, maybe weeks...

Dana

I am telling you Dana for you SANITY women, get them out! I am a sarcastic little one! I tend to get my point across through sarcasm, if people don't get it through other means. I know, I know it's not always polite but I do believe that in time like these politeness goes out the window and about a mile down the road.

Don't let them use the excuse of DOGS to stay in your home! These are grown adults they should know better. If you have to go to the store buy a gift card for $25.00 and say here ya go! This is enough for some Toilet paper and dog food, please do not take mine. I do not have a problem if you need to take a ROLL of TP and a scoop of dog food but please don't take all of it. Be smart about it, 25.00 out of your pocket is worth the sanity and stress you will save yourself. If you see them eyeballing your food and what not's just make a nice smart comment. Say things like you know just cause your MOVING OUT!!!! Doesn't mean I wont INVITE you to dinner every NOW AND AGAIN! Stop her before she does these things, let her know you know what she's thinking before she does it.

Just an idea!

I feel for you, Dana. I loved organicmaria's and angelz's suggestions for getting the SD's stuff out of your home. You could also have a Yard Sale with all of her belongings. You could do one of two things. Charge for her items to pay for the things she's "borrowed" from your home OR you could put out a sign that says "All items free to good home!" Either way, I'm sure DH and SD would get the message - time is up! You upheld your end of the bargain (allowing grown SD to stay with you, put your relationship w/DH on the backburner so he could be a good dad, neglected your own emotional well-being, tried to be a good SM, etc.), now it's time for them to uphold their end.

I will pray for you (and all SMs) for more patience. God knows best that we certainly need it!

Ladies,

I do thank you for your well wishes, prayers and scripted dialogues! I'm much better sticking up for someone else, lol, than myself, but I'm really either going to have to put up or shut up sonner or later! I just wanted things DONE this past weekend as my older two (5, 7) have camp this week, so we're trying to get them to bed earlier (I'm bad in that I let bedtime slide more than a bit if we have nothing going on). I also feel for my mother, who's at my house watching the 3 y.o. w/ the other SD and her bf lounging around. It's just uncomfortable, you know? You'd think they'd WANT to be at their own place, right? Do they need to be around a 73 y.o. woman and a 3 y.o. all day???? Ahh, maybe I should take the contents of my kitchen w/ me to work - then they'd move????

I'd love to say to SD who lives w/ us - I'm having a garage sale and I know you all bought some new furniture, so should I add your room to the sale???

I'll head home for lunch and see what's up ~ more to come, sadly...

Dana

Hang in there! They are almost out.:)
But i would still pack small stuff and send them over everyday! Every bit counts!
I remember my hubbies old girlfriend still had stuff in the house and garage when i moved in. I decided one day enough with the excuses...she would come over to check out things and then leave with nothign of hers.
So. I packed everything placed it in the garage....which had a leaky room that month which i did not fix. My hubby called her and said all your stuff is in the garage , come this sunday to pick up or it will go in the trash on monday since its all getting wet:)
Oh yah stop cooking for them! or cook something bad:)
Me

Maria,

See the latest post...I'm so defeated. The wind has definitely left my sails.

Dana