sounds to me like you are violating the visitation order by not allowing your ex the allotted time. If he was to wise up and take you to court, there could be trouble.....for you.

Be smart, if you are so concerned about this woman, talk to your lawyer and get revised visitation.

If I understand correctly, this new baby is your daughters HALF brother, not step brother. My opinion is that it would be wrong for you to interfere in your daughter having a relationship with her brother, no matter how you feel about the boys mother.

Why are you so fearful about what your ex is doing with her on the weekends? Is there some reason, or is it all because of his relationship with his girlfriend?
You didn't mention any reason you are fearful besides this woman. Why does the father allow you to have so much control over his visits with her? Has the woman done anything specific that would make you tell your daughter not to worry about being abused by her and that you will protect her?
If you are doing all of this simply out of bitterness with no other substantiated reason, then you have crossed the line and the courts would not look favorably on it. The court is not going to want to hear that she is a "worthless woman" they will want proof that your daughter is in some sort of danger around her, or likely they will tell you that you can't control how your ex lives, so long as your daughter is not in danger while she is with him.
Maybe there is more to the story than you told here, but based am your post it sounds like you are still bitter over your husbands affair and now you are putting your daughter in the middle. Of course your husband has the right to encourage a relationship between your daughter and her brother.
Be careful- one of the few reasons that a judge will order a change in custody, besides proveable neglect or abuse, is denial of adequate parenting time by the custodial parent.

Your ex-husband is no better than the woman he slept with - worse really because he was married and a father during the time that he did all the same things she did. If there is something so terrible about her that you fear your daughter even seeing her - do you feel the same way about your husband? He is her father and he has just as much right to raise her as you do (every other weekend anyway), so you should get used to this woman.

You say "I've been telling my daugher that I would do anything to protect her and she doesn't have to call the other woman step-mom or afraid to be abused by her," and I think you are going to mess up your daughter's head by doing this. She will deal with her new step-mom best if she doesn't have any pre-conceived negative ideas about her.

Unfortunately if your ex wants his two children to have a relationship there is nothing you can do about it. You should back off and try to give him the benefit of the doubt, before he takes you to court.

Worse than being abused by the stepmom - your daughter will be subjected to learning life through the eyes of a whore. Any father that would do that to a daughter is not worthy of the name and believe it or not .... the truth will always come out and the daughter will someday learn to despise them both for their behavior. There are no shortcuts in life and its funny how it all comes back to haunt you. If you don't believe it - just wait a few years. Truth will free you or detroy you depending on which side of the fence you want to stand on. Good always wins out in the end. May take a while - but just watch and see. Just be an upstanding mother and show your child what goodness looks like so that she knows the difference between what a really good woman is and what a shack up is. Then, she will never respect this "person" and will hold all behavior up against yours.

Let me tell you about all of the things that this woman had done to me and my daughter .

4 1/2 years ago, when we still lived in an apartment complex. This woman with her 2 children, cousins, and her mom moved in the apartment complex that was only 100 yards from us .

I married my Ex when I was only 20 and still going to college , he was 10 years older than me . Financially he is responsible, but we always had problems such as :

- He controlled the money in the house . Every week he put out some cash in a box for me .
- On the weekends, he liked to hand out with friends and his extended family to drink beers and singing Karaoke . He never took me and our daughter to places such as Park, Museum, etc.

This woman's cousins made friends with my Ex and invited him to their apartment for beers and Karaoke . That's how this woman met my Ex and started a sexual relationship with him .

She became so jealous with me and had her cousins sticked notes on the windshield on my car . In these notes, she scolded me and told me that she was pregnant . My husband did not say anything nor did anything to protect me .

On one ocasion, he was drinking so late at their apartment, I went over to get him . The woman's cousin (this guy was a wife-beater and had been in jail many times) came out and swing his fist into my face . I cried and ran home . A little after that my Ex came home and went to bed , didn't say anything about that .

A while after, we bought a house and moved to another area . I thought bad things would be over . Then I learned from my sister-in-law (she worked in same company with my Ex) that he brought to that woman into his company and she worked in the same building with him . Shortly after this, the storm started again . Every week, she would came up to my door once or twice yelling, calling my EX, and scolding me and my daughter . Everyweek, I had to call police . She even called me on my cell phone to harrass me (obviously, my Ex gave my cell phone # to her).

She spred rumors and publically said infront of other employees in his company that I am a drug user, I hooked, my daughter was not his daughter and that he should get a DNA test and stopped taking care of her .

When I had class in the evenings, my Ex took my daughter to her house, she and her relatives would said the same things directly to my little girl (I knew this because my little girl told me everything they said to her) . I confronted my Ex about these and asked him to take an action to stop this woman from making defamed stories about me and my daughter . He did nothing, said nothing, and continued to see the woman.

I also learned from the sister-in-law that the woman got pregnant and had an abortion . My Ex continued seeing this woman and even took her on an oversea vacation trip .

Also from the sister-in-law I learned about the woman's history and that she was a mistress of another man and had 2 children with that man .

At this time, I finished my school and got a job
I realized that our marriage was not happy, so I filed for a divorce . I took 1 1/2 year for our divorce to settle because he refused to pay me child support and refused to split the property . I had to get an attorney to fight with him . The divorce settled , he paid child support and split the property, but still didn't paid me any alimony support . We were married for 8 years . He kept claiming that he supported me going to school and made me felt so guilty (he criticized that I was a greedy woman) . Therefore, I didn't ask for any alimony support upon settlement .

On the court order, he can have my daughter every other weekend (6pm Fri to 6pm Sun) .

2 months ago, I learned that the woman is pregnant and this time she keeps it so that she can bind my Ex with her .

Everyone from his friends, family, relatives all said that he was so stupid ("less than animal", as they said ) to involve with this woman . She physically fought with my Ex in the company and verbally fought with many other employees, she spoke vulgar language, she publically scolded me and my daughter . My Ex has seen her done all of these things and did not thing to protect us nor to stop her , and continued to involve with her .

Obviously , this woman is stepping into my Ex's life and I'm so fearful that she (as a stepmom) will harm my daughter (She publically swore that she would take revenge on me and my daughter for her abortion because I was still married to my Ex at that time ! ) .

It had happened before at her house that the boys (her nephews) who were 10,11 years old, bossed my daughter, and touched my daughter the way they were not supposed to do . I had to reported this to the County and had her restraint by the Court .

This woman also lives with a female cousin who is drug addict and has been in jail many times .

Everytime thinking about she will be stepmom of my daughter gives me a lot of fear and worriness . I can't believe how my Ex could be so stupid to marry such a cruel , iliterate, and immoral woman to be my daughter's stepmom .

The word "mom" or "stepmom" is special word for special people . I don't care if my Ex re-marry, but it has to be the right one because she will be stepmom of my daughter . In this case, I will never allow my daughter to recognize such a immoral woman as a stepmom nor to recognize her child as brother or sister (this child may not even my Ex's child because obviously she is a mistress, husband-taker, and sleeps around with men) . I did make this clear to my Ex about this . And I would do anything I can to protect my child from that evil woman .

There are so many good women out there to marry , and I just don't understand of why he keeps sticking to this bad woman.

It sounds like she and your ex are a perfect match.

If you had a restraining order to keep her away from your daughter, what happened to it?
If you really feel like your daughter is in danger around her, then your best bet would be to see a lawyer about modifying visitation. Go for a free initial consult to determine if you have enough tangible proof to make a case. You really should go through proper legal channels, not just insist on accompanying your daughter on her father's court ordered visitation as that can look bad on you should your ex decide to file in court.
Lots of the things you posted are things that would upset me also, but are not really things the court will care about (trust me I know) If you ask the court to keep her away from your daughter, they are not going to care that she was your husband's mistress,they are not going to care that she harrassed you over three years ago, they won't care that she is illiterate, and they are not going to care who she lives with before she moves in with your ex. The fact that you had a restraining order on her may be able to be used to your advantage, depending on what what the restraining order said. The courts are not going to judge her as a person and decide if she is a positive influence for your daughter to be around, they will just determine if she is a proveable danger to your daughter. Hard to prove.
You are in a tough situation, and I can imagine how you feel.

Get a restraining order against her.. use the police reports to show proof of ongoing harassment. If you have a restraining order... then in most cases she will not be allowed to enter her own home while your daughter is visiting her father. Plus after you do all that get an attorney and get some help for the visitation schedule and see what the courts can do for you. Good Luck.. you sound like you are in a serious situation and I hope nothing happens to you or your daughter in the mean time. I know you would like to keep her from seeing her father but that will hurt you later in court. Most likely if you get a restraining order by an attorney the can set up a court hearing within like 14 days under an emergency. This would be your best bet if you are really as afraid as you say you are. God Bless!!!!!

Hi, thank you for your support . I'll keep my head up . I have another concern .

This woman (my Ex's current wife) has a female cousin who is a drug addict . The female cousin often comes whenever she gets a break from jail. It happened that this addicted girl also has the same first name with my first name . Can she steal my Social Security # to go to work ? (because my Ex has a lot of paper with my SSN display on it )

If not this addicted girl, then can the wife-beater (the gangster cousin) use my Social Security # to do illegal things ?

How can I find out if anyone use my SSN ?

Well I would not worry to much about all that. Unless you know that it is happening. Meanwhile you can contact the appropriate people via e-mail. All you have to do is look up Identiy Theft online and it will give you tons of information about it and who to contact.

Mitsu,
My father did the same thing, basically, he cheated on my mother, and got one woman pregnant, then left her while she was pregnant, and went with another woman which he later married and had a daughter with. I was 1 when the divorce and stuff happened. I'm now 16, but I have only seen my half brother one time in my life. I don't really like my step mother. She was kinda mean to me as a younger child. She would punish me for things her son and my half sister did, or she would sometimes have my step brother hurt me in some way. She has never liked me and I have known her practically my entire life. From what I have heard, she is the reason I have never seen my half brother. I heard she didn't want him to visit, because it would be to many children. My stepbrother and half sister, me, plus him would be 4 children running around the house on the visitation weekend. (My mother had insisted we visit on the same weekend so that I would have the opportunity to know my brother.) The problem is, my daddy didn't stand up to his wife, he never does. Right after she stopped my brother's visitation, she took in her nephew for a while, because his parents were going through rough times. So still there were 4 children running around the house only now 3 were full time instead of only 2, which made no sense to me.
Anyways, I think you should allow your daughter to get to know her brother, because I never had the chance to grow up with mine, neither did my half sister. We were both kept from him. BUT, if your EX's wife starts hurting your daughter or verbally abusing her, put a stop to it. My mother had arguement after argument with my father to stop my step mother from whipping me every time i visited. She knew I didn't deserve it, because I was to shy around the woman to be bad, and I hardly even got into trouble at home.
So, I believe it would be a good idea if you let your daughter see her sibling. Just keep asking her what happens when she visits. If anything bad starts, stop it.

I wouldn't hide the fact that your daughter has a half brother. It could lead to problems later on...like what if he shows up on your front porch to take your daughter out on a date? Let your daughter know she has a half brother and leave it at that. If she gets the opportunities to see him, then great, if not, she'll live, right? Just don't prevent her from doing something like that.

I also don't see why you're going to your ex's and staying and driving them around. Didn't you divorce this guy to get away from him? Sounds like he was a loser for a long time and you just stuck around. Maybe you thought you could change him or he would change on his own, but he didn't. Regardless of what you think you two still have a history that you share and a daughter. She's 10 so she's old enough to know when things aren't right. If this woman does end up with your ex, your daughter will be fine. Make sure you keep open communtication with her and if anything does happen she tells you. The first time she would abuse my kid, I would be reporting it and then you don't have to worry about her. You also have the old police reports and you could use those to see what rights you have. But I do wonder if your ex is even seeing this woman now? Maybe he messed around with her and she's pregnant with his kid, maybe the baby isn't even his! I think maybe you're trying to stop something that hasn't happened yet and frankly the police and courts wouldn't think that was okay. You need proof and remember she's innocent until proven guilty.