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kimic_gw

step parent and child not getting along

16 years ago

Hi my daughter is 4 years old. I just had another baby and am getting remarried to a man whom I really love and loves me. I went through hell with my daughters bio dad. He was an adulterer, had a severe gambling problem and for awhile made me feel as if my life was over. I divorced him and met a great man who is everything I was looking for. He took my daughter in as his own. In the beginning things were great until her bio dad found out about my new love. He started filling her head with bad things about my fiance, and now my daughter doesn't want anything to do with my fiance. Her bio dad put it in her head that I am going to leave so my daughter is glued to my hip. I cannot go to the bathroom without her crying. My fiance is starting to get frustrated because all my daughter does when he is around is cries for no reason. He is a fireman so he is gone for a 24 hour shift and she is fine but when he returns she cries for no reason. She's starting to lie and say my fiance says things that aren't said. He has tried taking her shopping and things are great but after a visit with her bio dad everything goes down hill. I've tried to talk to her, I've tried taking things away from her for disrespecting him but nothing seems to be working. My 4 year old daughter has told me she wants to live with her bio dad because he lets her do whatever she wants and I'm trying to establish a structured home, which means a bed time and time outs when being bad. I'm running out of things to do. I'm so afraid things won't change. I want her to be good with my fiance and I want a happy home. I don't want this behavior to ruin my relationship and new family. Any advice on how to handle the crying situation and the lies?? How do I ensure my daughter I'm not going to leave her? How can I make my fiance feel appreciated when he is working to put a roof over the head of my daughter who cannot stand him? How can the bio parents get away with ruining their childrens lives by filling their heads with crap?

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