Hi I'm 16 and know all about it! All you parents think you can just talk to your kids keep them to limited time with there boyfriends and have there trust to go to the moves malls ect.. but strict parents only make sneaky kids leaving the places they say they are parents don't really know what they are doing unless they are there to watch them summer school its not hard To leave and meet up with a guy and do stupid things... its not really in the parents control when their son/ daughter is going to give up their purity. Do you really think our generation is that stupid we do have brains not always doing the smartest thing but we do know what's right and wrong trust me I have done everthing my parents thought they could prevent from happing condoms are something u should give ur kids no matter how much u think u trust them or before u know it they will be teen moms/ dads witch could have been easily prevented but its better to give protection because we don't always think before we get warped up and there's nothing u can do after!! That one kiss that goes too far might be the one that changes their whole life!!! Think about it.

raek, Good question. In fact, there is so much animosity on my part towards this SD that I really don't know if there is anything she can do other than continue to ignore me as she has been doing for 18 years. The difference now is that I too chose to ignore her where as even as little as six months ago I still was worried about her, her decisions, her marriage, I still wanted the best for her.etc. What I don't appreciate about her is this sense of ''entitlement'' she thinks she has over her father. I must admit her father kind of contributed to her having this attitude and lack of respect towards me cuz everytime she did show a lack of respect towards me and I would tell him about it, he chose to ignore me and not to talk to her about it out of fear of being totally ignored by his daughter. There was a point where she was so mad/jealous of me that she would not talk to her father for months. During those times, he was the one who did everything to keep in contact with her. She would never call him and it hurt my DH and so he figures it was just better not to rock the boat with her and just do and be there for her every single time she called or wanted something from him - even if it would cause an argument between him and I. If you really want to get things moving in the right direction with your stepmom, I do suggest you do one very, very, very important point. Respect her! I will give you an example. I contributed to my SD's wedding gift. She has never personnally thanked me. She thanked her father, but not me. Nope! She has never, never given me a birthday card for the last 18 years and yet I've given her a birthday gift every year for the last 17 years. I stopped one year ago. Enough was enough. She had not given me a Christmas gift for the last three years. She gave me one three years ago but that's because she went shopping with her husband and they found something for me and her father - a hamac to install at the lake. Whenever she needs money, she calls her father and cries she needs money. DH sends her money. Stepdaughter thanks her father, but never never has thanked me. She just thinks this money comes from daddy and yet she knows darn well her father doesn't make enough money to be sending her some. Two xmas ago, we gave her a 400 dollar digital camera. The deal was that the three kids were going to get together that year to buy us a xmas gift. Xmas came and went and we never had a christmas gift, not even a christmas card explaining why we didn't get a gift. She told her FATHER she was too broke to buy us a gift, but she never told me , n ever even said she was sorry but yet she knew that camera came from ME and her father. When she got married, she gave everybody and anybody a corsage to wear. I was the only one in her family that didn't get one. Three people came up to me at her wedding telling me how mean that was of her. After all, I had been in her life for 14 years and already knew I was contributing to her wedding gift. During the wedding reception, she thanked everybody and their dog for showing up at the wedding etc. etc. etc. but never once thanked her father ...or me. Oh well! I could go on and on. I would send her care packages and not once did she call me to say thank you. Once I waited three weeks before she talked to me something I had sent her and the only reason she did talk to me about it then, is because I was the one who asked her if she liked what I had sent her. I wisk she would have called my when she got the gift and thanked me for it. That is the way I was raised but I guess she just didn't see the importance of calling me and thanking me for what I had given her. That was the last time I sent her something. Ignorant! I could go on and on raek but I'm starting to feel anxious and stressed just thinking about her. I'm getting even more anxious lately because I heard she wanted to divorce her husband and move back near us!NOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I told my husband that would be the beginning of the end between us! I c

I have to side with the others on here, your bf does not seem worth your committment. Marriage is a HUGE committment and should not be used as a tool to fix a broken relationship. I know that right now you have a baby and are not quite finished with college and it seems so hard to leave. But, for you and your daughter you should go. I say this from experience, being in a similar situation when I was only 19 and mother to a 4 month old baby. I was scared to leave my ex, who treated me like crap. I was worried about how I would support our son on my own. For a while I thought it would be better to stay because of my son. Then I realized that a miserable mom was not good for a child. So, when I finally hit my breaking point with my ex I left. I had to move in with family and work full-time while going to college full-time and raising a baby. It was a struggle. But, it paid off. I felt like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders when I left. Sure, I had nights when I cried myself to sleep. But, when I saw his next gf as miserable as I had been I realized I had made the right choice. He would never change. For the next few years I focused on me and my son, got my life on track, and regained my self-esteem. I decided that I deserved much more than I had in my ex. I dated around for years, picking apart each man I dated to my friends. They often joked that I would be an old spinster. I almost thought I would be, then I met the man of my dreams. The way he treated me and the way I instantly felt around him was wonderful! This is what I deserved. Years later we married and are very happy. I have thought back many times to how horrible my life would have been if I had not made the decision to leave my ex. You deserve so much more than this guy is giving you. Please do not settle for this. Your almost done with school and have so much life in front of you-do not waste it You do not want to look back when your 35 and say "I should have left back then!"

Heck, yeah, the fiance/husband will move in! I've seen & heard parents who maintain rigid, total control over their children. They'll moan & groan & complain (loudly) about how they're being disrespected & used & run over & how they have to take whatever the happy couple dishes out... but they always "allow" the child's spouse to move in. If the couple sets out to actually find an apartment, the parents undermine their confidance & *offer* their "help". which involves remaining at home dependent on the parents, & being subject to curfews & having to ask permission to take trips. People *can* refrain from micro-managing their child's life while still being helpful, supportive, & reasonable, & part of that is being realistic about expectations; if your 21-year-old daughter never has had a "real" job, & never has managed her own schedule, demanding that she get a real job & move out within a shortish time frame is spiteful & destructive. You might as well demand that she become an astronaut by Easter. Try it & see what happens to the anger quotient in the relationship.