Dealing with his ex's restrictions
I have been with my husband for over a year now and have built a very close and stong relationship with his three children. Since this has become very evident to the kids mom she has become increasingly more and more hostile in regards to my involvement with the children. Just recently she has made some very restrictive demands on my husband in regards to communication with the kids when they are at her house such as; they are no longer allowed to talk to me when my husband calls the kids to say goodnight as she feels this is interferring with her time with her kids, my husband is now only allowed to call them one time daily (where it used to be once after school to see how their day went and once before their bed time at 9 PM) and that call must be made prior to 8 PM (one minute later and she now turns all phones off, including the one he has provided for the kids). It has gone so far as my stepdaughter was excited to tell me about an event that happened at school and so when my husband called to say goodnight asked if she could talk to me. As he handed me the phone and she started telling me her event, I spoke only a couple of words before my stepdaughter literally said, "wait.....hang on one second....." and the phone was hung up. We tried to call back and all phones were turned off and we received a ranting letter from the kids mom telling my husband not to break her rules or she will not allow any phone calls during her time.
I just do not know how to deal with a person this bitter and unsecure. We can see the kids misery in feeling torn and have tried to communicate with her and ask her to please take a step back and ask herself if what she is doing is really best for the children or just her being selfish, but this was to no avail.