We have a double basin sink. When we do dishes, the dish rack sits in one of the sides of the sink. Dishes typically get hand dried and put away almost immediately, the rack gets stored underneat the sink along with the dish soap. We have a dispenser for the handsoap. We also have on of those "flip out" trays at the top to store a brush, although it does sit out until it dries. I'm not a neat freak, so a little counter clutter doesn't bother me. Our towel hangs on the fridge handle, although we've thought about putting a small rack in the sink base cab. We've had this set up for about 5 years. While I'd admit that having the sink in the island isn't ideal, it has worked out well for the way we live. It certainly wasn't as messy as I'd feared, and we've always gotten compliments about our sink arrangement.

Not familiar with the alternate sink, but if that's THE sink, I'd look for something you could rough in by sitting it on top of the sink cabinet or even not putting that cabinet in and using a utilitarian wash tub there until the sink arrives. That's something pretty special, so I would make do temporarily but not settle. If you find something else you love and that works with everything else as well or better, that's different -- but I wouldn't settle.

We're almost a year into a full-house renovation, which will probably end up about 90% DIY. We'd DIY-ed smaller reno projects on our previous home, plus a full refit on a 40-foot sailboat, and all those previous projects had gone quite well, so we felt competent to take this BIG project on. I have to say there have been many times we've regretted it!! To be fair, there have been a lot of unexpected major surprises, though. We thought we'd be totally done (interior + exterior) by now, but I'd say we're about halfway. I think the WORST part is that we've had absolutely no time for our daughter.Every single weekend and after-work free time has been spent working on the house, often in dirty and stressful conditions. The house has been mostly piles of parts, materials and debris all year. Poor kid!!! I have been the project manager and GC and it's been nearly a full-time job at many stages. Researching, sourcing, and ordering parts and materials takes a long time! I've also been the designer for some pretty major changes, with input from architect friends and the talented folks on GW of course! I spent months and months at a drafting board last spring trying to figure out how to add another bedroom and make a workable kitchen, living, dining area. I concur with those above who say that even when you hire subcontractors, you have to be prepared to spend time and mental energy supervising. The times I did NOT do that were the times things had to be ripped out and redone later.... so even when you spend the $$ you still need to do some of the work. I guess that's why people hire General Contractors to do that for them. I'll add a tool that's indespensible for any major project: a compressed-air nailer!! We had access to both a framing gun and a finish nailer, and MAN did they make that work go so much faster!!!!! Tools, I agree, are so important. You just can't do a good job without the right tools. Or maybe you can but it takes a lot more time and frustration! In my Christmas stocking I got a pliers set and under the tree was a screwdriver-tip kit and a new screwdriver set from DH. Romantic, huh? But now he won't worry I'm borrowing his work tools (he works at a boat yard which is GREAT for us since he has access to the whole woodshop there with awesome woodworking tools.) Books: We find that the Taunton pro series is best for really useful info. Here's the scope of our project and what we've done so far: Landscape drainage- 25% DIY, 75% subcontractor Main living space (kitchen, mudroom, dining, living) reconfigured, including moving several bearing walls): -demo: DIY, including walls, tile flooring, subfloor, plumbing & electrical -rough framing: subcontractor -sheetrock: subcontractor -plumbing: DIY, major replace entire kitchen -electrical: DIY, major, rewire 4 new rooms to code -cabinet install: DIY -appliance install: DIY -counter install: subcontractor (marble) -hardwood flooring install and finish: DIY -slate tile flooring: DIY -window/door trim: DIY (ongoing) -backsplash tile: DIY (not done yet, she says sheepishly!) -paint: DIY -woodstove install: DIY -pantry cabinetry build and install: DIY -built in bookcases buiild and install : DIY -heating/radiators install throughout: DIY Master bedroom/master bath/new office-bedroom- -demo: 50% DIY, 50% subcontractor (it was a mold issue and the insurance paid for much of this work to be done in order to eradicate the mold) -framing: subcontractor with close DIY supervision! -sheetrock: ditto above, plus we had to DIY a bit of it. -electrical: DIY -plumbing: DIY except for basic DWV layout -heating: DIY -tile: Bill Vincent!! -radiant heat floor install: DIY -window/door/finish trim: DIY -tub, toilet, vanity, etc install: DIY -paint: DIY Exterior- remove all vinyl siding and re-side with cedar shakes; paint all exposed concrete areas; install 3 new windows; build 3 porches and one deck; paths and landscaping: all DIY Phew. Now I'm really tired. Ugh- back to painting trim and installing toilets and lights today!!!

I haven't read HB, but as far as Joe being a somewhat likeable character in You, I found that he was a perfect characterization of psychopathic batterers/stalkers. After working for most of my career with victims of domestic violence and women who were victimized other ways, I can say with confidence that MANY of those perpetrators seem likeable to others and they also seem to have that reasonable dialog in their heads about what is going on with them and their victims. They have a tremendous ability to justify their actions, based on their (sick) interpretation of the actual facts. I became interested in domestic violence (having never been exposed before) when I was in my 30's, living in a very small town for the first time (having grown up in a city), where I became friends with a completely wonderful woman. She was married to a dairy farmer who was also a high school teacher and had 5 lovely children. A picture perfect family in many ways. But as we grew more close, I could see some disturbing things about the way he treated her. And eventually I learned the truth. She was terrorized by him. Raped daily. He beat the cows with 2/4's because they were female and made sure she knew it. He nailed the pen shut of a female dog and made his family watch her starve to death. He was a good old boy, on the school board, his community had no idea what went on in that family. He threatened to kill her and the children should she leave. Once he knew that I knew, I feared being shot through my window some dark night. So, as I was reading about Joe and his obsession, I pictured him (my friend's husband, now ex) and the hundreds of men that I heard about over the years who wooed women, then tortured them. Joe was NOT at all likeable to me. The author really nailed it with him.