oh, definitely--have the son put a freeze on his credit w/ the credit unions, in case dad tries to take out a loan or credit card. (is it possible that dad doesn't realize the son will not get his refund bcs of this? Maybe dad thought the only party affected would be the U.S. govt? And so dad didn't think he was actually stealing from his own kid?) And help your son figure out what he'd need to prove that he is not his dad's dependent: -rent receipts and utility bills from the entire year, to prove that he paid for his own roof -ATM-card records to show that he bought groceries often from a grocery store near his home, to prove that he paid for his own food -pay stubs, other work documentation to prove that he was occupied full-time and therefore not a student If he doesn't have any of these things, he can substitute letters (notarized!) from the appropriate people--landlord, boss, roommate. "Junior was a full-/part-time employee who worked X hours a week, from Start Date to December 31, 2006"--especially if he doesn't have pay stubs w/ hours worked, etc. Also to prove he wasn't a student. Have him put it in a folder, and label it, etc., and find a place to keep it so that he'll find it when he needs it. (I keep all receipts, etc., from every tax return in a folder w/ the return itself--just in case) Another thing perhaps, to help w/ the immediate crisis, is for someone who could be a go-between (paternal uncle? paternal grandma? you?) to call the dad and tell him he needs to give his son some money to make up for the fact that he has stolen his kid's tax refund. I know you're using the term "adult" lightly, and in this situation, you *should* use it lightly. Things like this are hard for kids to learn while they're still "kids" and being taught by their parents. This sort of grownup-finances stuff is why parents' work isn't done just because a kid turns 18. This could be a good lesson for him in how to prepare documentation for court, in how to keep records of finances, etc. (all the best lessons hurt, unfort.) I wonder if your son could take him to small-claims court for the amount of the refund? print out the reply from the IRS, ask his brother to testify to the conversation? The ideal would be if he could get his hands on his dad's tax return; I don't think you can subpoena documentation for small-claims court.

"I don't know what the reasoning behind that statement was?" There is a lot of reasoning behind waiting a year after you get married. First of all, sometimes non existent parents find out you are remarried and all of a sudden, they pop out of the woodwork and want to reclaim their family/child. It isn't about the child, it's about their insecurity and having some other man/woman raising 'their' child. Then there is the issue of second marriages having a higher divorce rate than first marriages and adoption, unlike marriage, cannot be reversed. It is a legal obligation until the child reaches majority and you cannot divorce an adopted child. angelnetta, you need to speak to an attorney about adoption, not seek advice from the internet. I'll share my honest opinion, it seems that there is a lot of instability in your situation. Now, I don't know it all from your short post but your ex ran off with your friend before your baby was born and you've all moved to different states and he moves around so much you can't track him and nobody has ever put a dad on the birth record. and now you are getting married to a guy that was there when your baby was born... after you say your ex left just a week prior? That's a lot going on in two years time. This is just my opinion but an attorney would know for sure. You should establish the father with DNA testing and then proceed with terminating his rights and then proceed with adoption. If you shortcut it, saying you don't know who the dad is (and I don't know if you can even do that) then the real dad may someday pop up, ask for DNA test and toss any adoption out of the window. See an attorney.

Wow, thanks for all the kind words! We tried to get some sort of reaction out of our kids and the workers but no one was saying much ;-) I should have known I could count on gardenweb! linb007, the floors are common 1 and 2 random width (3-5-7) american black walnut. I fell in love with some I saw at 32 dollars a sq foot (of course) and hunted them like prey until I found them for less than a quarter of that. We got them from Blackford & Sons out of Tennessee, unfinished with hand scrapped edges. My contact there is Luke Blackford. They are sweethearts there. I can send you his email if you want. kitchenkrazed, I am going to post this seperately (cabinet issue), I need the GW advice! The firm is a very reputable firm, HOWEVER, our designer left a week before we placed the order. So we are in a sort of odd situation and they never gave us a list of exact cabinets (I wasnt liking that but that is how they said it worked), they gave us 100 drawings and elevations and the cabinet type and finish, etc. but not a detailed BOM. So we are discussing it with them right now but I dont like that I dont have my original designer to clearly state that this is not what we discussed. honorbilkit, yes, we are surprised to find out that we are doing ok without the first floor. Esp since we always say the house is too small for us (we love our neighborhood though). My 6 year old said today he doesnt want to move back into the first floor. I thought he liked the closeness of all of us. Turns out he liked being able to watch TV while eating (basement set up, not allowed in real life upstairs). Rascal. Dinalo, yes that is stenciling, or as we like to say: entertainment for the onsite crew. Its one of my "Projects" where i experiment and stress out my husband. We had rich blue walls (faux sky) before so to cover it, I laid a TON of primer and ceiling white, and I COULD STILL SEE THE BLUE! So then I lugged 50 lbs of joint compound in (this is where the workers perked up wondering what the heck I was up to) and slathered it on. Then I color washed it with acrylics. Then I did a dimensional damask stencil with some of the bottom metallic paint mixed in. Since this photo I have added metallic highlighting to match under chair rail and then started distressed it with sandpaper (not done) b/c my highlighting was too "new" looking. Its like an 18 layer wall. I think I need to be committed if I make any starts towards 19. It's been sort of fun, Ive been cranking the ipod and putting movies on for the kids, but I think most people could skip 80% of my steps and get a similar effect! Lol.

I may be there myself in a week depending on many things. Lancaster County in PA is full of covered bridges. All over the US, these wooden structures are disappearing and most that are standing today have been extensively rebuilt or are replicas. That's to be expected of a wood structure that's been sitting outside for over hundred years. But what is important is, was the repair faithful to the original design? Reboarding the superstructure and flooring might be considered minor, or maintence repair. However, tinkering with the support frame is major. When you find a truly old bridge, photogaph it! It may not be there next year. I know of two bridges that I have photographed that are now destroyed: One in Madison Co, IA and another in Parke Co, IN. I found several brides in upper Vermont and New Hampshire that were for show only. They looked great and still carried traffic, but when I examined underneath the bridge, the full story emerged. The small towns in the northern part of these two states do not have sufficient budget to repair these bridges to bring them up to today's required loads, yet at the same time they desired to retain the "look and feel" of the bridge. Tourist trade is a factor. I found how they solved this problem. Under the old bridge was another bridge, the one supporting the loads. The highway department had installed the load bearing parts of a modern bridge made of steel H-beams. The wood bridge became merely decoration sitting on steel beams - sort of took away the nostalga. So, take your cameras and document the bridges. In my opinion, there are two times in the year when these old bridges have the most photo appeal, and that is in the fall when the leaves turn and after a fresh snowfall in the winter. The lousiest time is late winter and early spring with no greenry of snow cover. Summer pictures can be great too; You have to be more selective and creatiive with composition.