"I can't believe that an architect has this level of detailed knowledge ..." That's an odd thing to say since providing detailed information, including the quality of all materials as well as industry standards and installation requirements, is a basic part of an architect's services. There are "Master Specifications" in digital format that are written for architects to edit for each project but they would probably be too expensive to purchase for a single project and you would still need to be able to understand the large number of choices offered and the amount of information would be considerably more than what a builder would provide. What you might be able to use is a "Master Outline Specification" which is basically a list of all of the materials with bare minimum descriptions and no standards or installation requirements. This is what a homebuilder normally provides to a homeowner but an architect would normally use it as the preliminary step in writing a full specification. It is also a normal part of an architect's services to explain the different kinds of contracts and project delivery methods and advise you on what would be appropriate for your situation. If you want to learn enough to be able to do all of this yourself it is best to practice on someone else's house first because novice mistakes can be expensive and cause delays. I would suggest hiring an architect or entering into a design-build contract with the builder where the designer works for the builder. Taking responsibility for the design and construction documents yourself without much knowledge or training with only the assistance of a designer exposes you to major risks as you seem to be discovering.

Those are all good ideas. I already have some experience with keeping track of various papers and with filing systems--I have "my own" filing areas for the kids, for family health records, for my hobbies, and when each of my parents (who were divorced) developed health problems and dementia, I kept all their accounts, papers, mail, sales of homes, etc in "my" study. And I have some idea of how I would set up a filing system for all of this other stuff if I were doing it all for me. What is a bit more difficult is first, getting to the point where I can help and second, trying to see whether "we" are setting up a filing system that works for him, or me, or both. Meaning, what's a bit new in my thinking is whether ultimately he might never be able to keep up any system and so I take over more of the system and the filing and then tell HIM where stuff is, or whether he would collaborate and let me be "the consultant" so if h e wants labelled shoeboxes instead of files, that's fine, etc.--what I am trying to go to a new level on is, how to "feel out" the situation as to whether he is overwhelmed and will never ask for help but really wants it, or whether it is some line I can't cross. So I'm moving into being more pro-active but trying (very hard for me, sometimes!) to keep saying to myself, remember the big picture, the long haul, and not instant gratification, and also, bite my tongue when I'm tired and cranky and feel like saying something that is accusatory. Since he almost never asks for help, with anything, we all in our family probably think of him as invincible, and I'm kinda hopeful that he might actually want help if it's done right. harrietthehomeowner, I don't think outside help is right for him. But again, what will help me most in trying to do something now is to focus on family needs--that clearly I would never be able to take over, or even help out, with our papers and stuff if anything happened to him(illness or other) and I'm hoping even he can see that that would be a bad situation for our family. Whereas, if it's the guy's toolshed or hobby shop, you could just shut your eyes. cocontom, great point about the electronic conversions--he is actually the most "on line" person in the family and is probably receptive to doing more--mostly we have the busy-syndrome, where you have to make yourself carve out time to do things that will save time in the long run. One thing that is obvious is that I will have to find an extended period of time--don't have that until later in the fall--to actually start the project physically, but could be planning what types of shelving or filing equipment needed. I'm free to play around with floorplans on my own! This is one of those things where, since you can't move in the room, you need to haul everything out and say, what goes back in? It's like, you can't really sort through boxes of stuff until you have alternative destinations for each category. Here is one more interesting point that may test how committed I am. When we moved to this house, "his study" was to be this destination financial stuff, tools,etc, and "my study" was the combo guest room, photo file repository, various family-use items, and whatever I wanted, I guess. So I have guest linens, out of season decorations, hobby supplies, gift wrap, family mementos from my parents, and just "stuff" of mine, pretty well organized. And folks can get and use stuff from there, or I can get it for them. So--and wonder if folks can relate to this--I have a tendency to think I am using my space "well" for the family and he is not. You know how as the DW, you tend to think that ultimately all spaces are yours--it's hard to view any areas as sacred and off-limits to your organization and cleaning and meddling. So, if it somehow turned out that he could not "share" this filing concept, but said, well, if you're going to take over, do it somewhere else than my room, I don't know if I'm big enough to sacrifice my space to put all of it--I would have to completely re-do how my space is organized and would not have room for some of the fluff and stuff I have. I don't think that would happen, but I just wondered.

circuspeanut: I've been admiring your style and DIY skills. I would enjoy such beautiful copper countertops! The stain/color and style match of the cabinets is spectacularly seamless. Mid-construction mess and unfinished floors are part of the process, there is nothing to forgive :) slc, I don't think it is an odd question at all. The hallmark of a successfully completed project is a plan that encompasses the whole project rather than planning it in parts with the hope that it holds together when the project is finished. The scope can be as small as one room, in this case my kitchen, or it can be a house or shopping center or college campus. Many folks build with the intent to upgrade countertops or plan for new refrigerators or cooktops, and live with the first phase until we/they save for the new appliance. I agree there are many well-done mixed finishes GWers kitchens. The ones I've followed seem to be planned as one project, albeit sometimes a many-months/years project. What I am asking is has anyone actually planned phases in which the kitchen is essentially in a 'finished' style and construction state at the end of a phase? In our case I expect phase 2 will be in 3-5 years when we've saved enough to pay cash. My question was trying to discover, if anyone has done this...Is the space functional? Is cooking workable? What was used to stand-in for the missing pieces of cabinetry? Were the missing pieces more style or function pieces? Did the kitchen plan change in phase 2? Our philosophy is to buy once by investing our budget in the highest quality we can afford. For example, when we were married, we had some money saved knowing that when we graduated from college we would have less net worth, but owned money to no one. We put off anything that was not essential. At the end of a year we literally had no living room furniture-we sat on the floor and watched a used $19 TV. That's just us, and everyone has their own philosophy and priorities. That is just to say we want a kitchen that doesn't need a do over in 10-20 years. Something classic and excellent construction. I think a phased project is our hope of achieving the kitchen we want. I'm sorry to post this and run. I'm going to visit my dad for the day.

I hope for your sake it's a limited infestation. It can be expensive to repair termite damage. Back to the cabinets...it sounds like you have to replace at least 3 cabinets...one way or the other. The chancy thing about picking your cabinets and just ordering the one wall now and the second wall later is that the door style and/or finish may not be available a few years from now. The other issue is the possible change in floor plan. You might consider a few things right now.... Look into designing your new kitchen now....not installing it, designing it. We could even help you with that. Then, when you have what you think is a close-to-final floor plan, go to a few KDs and be honest with them. Perhaps they can tell you what door styles & finishes most likely will be around 7 years from now. There may be "classic" styles & finishes that never go out of style so are around for decades. Once you have a few options (hopefully!), determine what you can afford now vs what will have to wait. Hopefully you'll be able to at least install your sink & DW in their new home. It may mean moving some other things around and having a less-than optimum kitchen for a few years, but if you have a plan, you may actually be able to do bits & pieces over time rather than doing some now and then waiting another 5 - 7 years to do anything else. Another option is to look into inexpensive cabinets to get you through the next few years....perhaps IKEA would work. Many people here do entire kitchens for only $2500 or so. For one wall, it should be less expensive. No, there aren't a lot of door or finish choices, but they do have basic doors that might not clash w/what you have now and decent construction so they will hold up well over time. It would also eliminate the extensive carpentry you mentioned to get a DW. Another consideration is that many people here have even installed their own IKEA cabinets...saving even more on the cabinet install cost. When you do re-do your kitchens, I bet the cabinets will still be in good shape and could be moved to the garage, basement, laundry room, etc. You could also go the route of building basic (or purchasing inexpensive) open shelved cabinet carcasses and using them until you're ready for a remodel. If you don't like open shelving you could hang curtains or something in front of them. If it were me, I would probably do option #2 (IKEA cabinets) since I suspect your floor plan changes probably won't be conducive to a piecemeal approach. ++++++++++++++++++ As to the countertop, I would go with either an inexpensive laminate or butcher block (I prefer laminate, but others have the opposite view....YMMV). For the sink, if you go w/a temporary cabinet solution, get an inexpensive drop in sink. For a faucet you could either go inexpensive there as well, or buy the one you really want now...faucets are easily moved. Maybe it'll be the thing to keep you on track saving up for the remodel and remind you of what's to come to keep your spirits up. It may also be the one thing to put a smile on your face in what's sure to be a compromise kitchen for now. Good luck and I hope this has helped!