Yeah plants talking back would be funny, it would have been better if not only water, but reported ph and nute readings lol. Mark

Just one person's opinion--but the machine should NOT be programmed to give checks to dead people. Her taxes were filed, clearly labeled that she was deceased, and this letter acknowledges that fact. When the check arrives, it will go into the estate account. It's NOT legal for me to do anything but divide this money among the heirs. I cannot--as executor--make the decision to donate this to charity. As executor, I've got the fiduciary responsibility of doing exactly what her will specifies--no more, no less. It's illegal to do otherwise. So looks like we'll each be getting an extra $75 when I make the final distribution. Well, it's a nice dinner out with our spouses--something Mom would approve of. She LOVED going out to eat.

This is probably going to tick some off but I've just got to add my $.02. There are some very different opinions of love, genuine concern for community and friends, gifting and forgiveness, what a gift is and what a shower is. Any shower, no matter who throws it and what the invitation looks like. Yes even a tacky e-mail invite is still an invite. Welcome to the electronic age. A gift is something that is willingly and happily presented to another person with out expectations of payment, restitution or compensated for by the receiver. If you consider a party designed to give gifts, such as SHOWERS, begging parties DON'T GO. The shower is for the BABY. People who are involved in the life of the Mom and or Dad care enough about the coming or just birthed child to give something to help with the care of a child. A child that was not planned and the parents are struggling could find these gifts a blessing indeed. Those who want and can attend can give as generously as they want or feel necessary. If that means a life time bedroom set or if it is a bid and baby spoon woo hoo for the kid! All babies need STUFF and baby shower gifts are just the original BIRTHDAY GIFTS. Give or don't, go or don't its up to the invited person. My belief is to give a gift to the child after it's birth not before, but I have attended showers and just given a token gift of a stuffed toy or a few bibs then after the child birthed gave something more special or in some cases needed. A child is a blessed event. Not in all cases is it planned, within the "sacred" bounds of marriage or even accepted by both parents and their entire family lines. So what? A child is a child innocent and in need of love and protection. If the Mom and Dad can and will provide together for the child and all the family will be there for support and love that is a right thing to do. If there is some reason one parent or another cannot help rear the child in the best possible ways then be hopeful and happy someone can and will provide what the child needs to live a safe and happy life. I've seen to many tragic stories of children and infants alone, abused, neglected, enslaved, sold and sacrificed. From the OP and several answers so far there is gossiping, complaining, greed, anger, retaliatory negative wishes no one shows up??? and judgmental attitude towards another persons actions and choices in a tough situation. Those who have offered kind words about/to the man and his situation Thank you for keeping love first in your hearts. The levels of wrongness in this thread are simply mind-boggling, aren't they? Bless this man for trying to take responsibility of the health and well being of a child, (biologically his or not isn't the issue if it is his in his heart). If I were him in need for my child I would "beg" for help too. If I knew who he was I would send them a little 'sometingsometing' as my grammy would say. LIL

I had to read this twice. Looks like from the second post that the OP did not encourage the family to attend the wedding - the 'adult' part of her simply decided not to push the issue and agreed not to attend, herself. Dirtunder, are you upset by the events, or are you upset by the silence? Sometimes the elephant in the room left undiscussed is far more painful then the event itself. At any rate, we all benefit by setting emotions aside and by learning how to talk to our families about what upsets us. BTW, is anyone talking about the fact that brother is an alcoholic and had (has) sexual boundary issues? This seems like a forest through the trees topic to me.