My husband has MS, diagnosed about ten years ago. We told everyone. His main symptom, at least at the beginning, was fatigue. Are you close enough you can offer to help with chores, take her children out to the playground, anything to give her time to just nap or rest? There's a saying in the MS world "But you look so good." Meaning that people with MS still look normal, it's hard for the outside world to know just how bad they are feeling. You are sweet to be cOncerned. A simple call, I heard you're sick. Visit with her, invite her to spend time with you, people with MS tend to withdraw and avoid physical activities that tire them. Just being a friend, someone she can talk to, means an awful lot.

Perhaps this is the time to reach out from the heart and who knows you might find yourself getting closer. Distance does make it difficult but it's always nice to know someone cares.

Bearcat, make a call. If BIL answers the phone; talk to him and I am sure you will know what to say. Then ask if she feels like talking. If she answers, let her know that you care. You have made the move, now it is up to her/them.

You can also send cards from time to time.

Not much else you can do under your present circumstances.

Sue

I'm sorry to hear this. Is your husband close with his brother? I don't know much about MS except that is has various degrees of severity. Some people may look okay, some wheelchair bound etc.

They have got to be in a shock mode of getting used to the diagnosis. Maybe let your DH talk to his brother and see what they need? Do they want to be left alone to absorb the shock, do they want family around? Depends on them.

A card would always be a nice idea, just to say you are thiking about them. If you are up for it, you could call and ask if she wants to talk, cry, vent etc? Let her guide the conversation. Honestly, I wouldn't know what to say either?

Good Luck

Thanks everyone. They are about 400 miles away, so we're not close enough to help out at home. DH is not close with his brother (we think SIL is a saint for putting up with him...lol) but they do make a good couple :)

We're going to call her tonight and chat. Thank you all for your suggestions!

Two of my friends have had MS for a few years.
Although they have some issues to deal with, both are fairly active, walking, driving and enjoying life.

This disease is much more treatable now than it was in the past.
Best wishes to your sister in law.

I have several friends with varying degree's of MS...my niece was diagnosed about 8 years ago...she's very high functioning...but there are times when she curls up in a ball and sleeps for a couple of days...it acts different for everyone...reaching out to her with a simple call and offering your help or just a listening ear may be just the ticket to bring you closer!! If nothing else...tell her to get on the web and start researching...their are hundreds of sites and helpful hints for working with this awful disease...

I wish Wanda/Va would come in and see this post...her hubster has had it for years and is very high functioning! I think lots depends on what area of the body it touches...

give her my best thoughts...

Sorry to hear this. MS isn't like it use to be they have many different treatments for it. Best to get on one right away they help keep it where it's at in some case. I have had MS since 2001, I'm very active which is a good thing for all to keep moving. I do everything I use to do but in moderations. I work in the garden for a little while sit down and rest then get going again. Send her a card just thinking about you would be good enough also the offer to help and follow through is great. She will be going through a lot just trying to adjust to what she was told.

We have quite a bit of this on my moms side of the family.My BIL has had it for years and at first it was debilating at times and he was in a wheel chair.Then he decided to take charge of his life and health,did a lot of research and changed his lifestyle totally,and he said the most important part of that was his diet.He's doing well now and still travels a lot by himself from Va to upstate N.Y. to see family.

I did lose a 15 yr old nephew from this a few years ago,and now his little brother is fighting the same battle as is his aunt,and they are all at different stages of it.

Prayers for your SIL.
Kathi

Interestingly tonight a show called W5-Investigative Reports, here is Canada aired a show about a possible treatment for MS tonight. I just now finished watching it and it is very interesting. Here is a link to the program. You might want to check it out and pass along the information.

Here is a link that might be useful: W5 Inverstigative Reports program

I just thought I should post the direct link to the actual story in case someone checks this later and the front page of W5 changes the stories. Here is the link to one of the articles on MS.

Here is a link that might be useful: MS possible treatmnent

Just be understanding when she has to change plans because she doesn't feel up to it. My best friend who has MS says that is the hardest thing for her. She makes plans but sometimes at the last minute she must cancel because she is so tired or "burning up" as she calls it. It's difficult because to see her you wouldn't notice anything wrong. She still works full time and is quite active but there are those times. Just make an offer to listen when she needs it.