This was the thread that helped me put a name to the style of garden that I love best. I have been working towards the cottage style for many years and never get tired of the evolution of it. Loved reading them all again today. Cheryl

You did it!!! You did it!!! Oh, Caroline, I am so happy for you. And tremendously impressed too, not only by the physical difficulty of the trip, but by your dedication to a good cause. What an amazing thing you did. I can hardly wait to see your photos. Welcome back! Now you can sit back and watch the Giro d'Italia starting on Saturday. (Universal Sports, on TV & online) You'll have new appreciation for the pros putting in over a hundred miles a day in mountainous terrain LOL! Wow, you are one tough cookie...

Firstly, about that episode where your bio father suggested sex: you had no way to know to anticipate it, & you had no way to control or stop it. Although it *is* obnoxious, offensive, & disgusting to you & to me, it sometimes happens when bio family members meet for the first time as adults, so much so that counsellors now warn adult children who are meeting their birth parent(s) for the first time to be prepared. & your bio father's family troubles belong to him & to them, not to you. If anything, it sounds like your father brought you into the family to be used as leverage. Dispicable, but the responsibility & the shame belong to your bio father & not to you. Cut yourself free from that particular chain & don't look back. Today is what matters, & you & your children are living under unbearable stress, in a hostile environment, & you're all paying a terrible price. "He thinks I'm evil" is *not* the description of someone you can afford to turn your back on, let alone trust, let alone spend your life with. (note: He doesn't think you're "evil"; he knows that saying that will shatter you, & that's why he does it.) He's been lying to you & manipulating you since before you were married, his family sounds like a co-dependent, disfunctional mess, & sending copies of the facebook pages to all of them sounds like that you've been caught in the same web, going to everybody else for vindication or action instead of dealing with the one person who's actually accountable. If your husband doesn't have any consequences for continuing to behave as he always has behaved, *nothing will change*. He's entirely comfortable, even happy, with his life, he doesn't care that you're unhappy, & he controls you by striking at your most vulnerable points; why would he change anything? It's like raising a child; if you say, "do that one more time & you're losing computer priveleges for a week", & the child does it again, you *have* to take away computer priveleges for a week, or you're just teaching the child that (s)he doesn't have to pay attention to anything you say/threaten, that you're powerless, that (s)he can do *anything* & the worst that will happen is that you'll yell. If you tell your husband that he has to treat you with the respect to which anyone is entitled or you & the children are leaving, & then he says something obnoxious or betrays you by talking to his family about you or does any single obnoxious thing, you *have* to take those kids & leave. (In fact, at this point, I think you have to take the kids & leave anyway; your life & their lives are being corroded every day that you spend in the environment controlled by your husband & his family.) Although it isn't your fault, although you've been manipulated to think you "can't" do anything because you somehow bear the responsibility for his behavior, so far, you've been like the parent who threatens but does not act. Even if your husband never hits you, he's abusing you: A person who controls another person by manipulation, who calls her "evil", who blames her for his own behavior...is an abuser. Get some professional legal help, get some psychological help (abusers *never* go to counselling; they don't want any interference), investigate what kind of help is available for abused wives, & get your kids & get out of there. I wish you the very best.

Jlc, you're stunning dear. Your hair is faboo… Like the others, it's not at all what I expected. I have seriously curly hair, and wear it just past my shoulders with very long layers. Any other cut would be treacherous on a humid day. I'm a bit older than you, and that style works for me. I have had too many bad haircuts to worry about if I'm too old for what works best. I color it because I don't feel old enough to be all grey. Maybe one day I'll move to a silver bob, but probably not for another decade or so… Ellendi and BBee3 mentioned Keratin. I tried about 5 different professional Keratin treatments, and there is a wide range of results. Some are poker straight, others hardly any difference. I like the one that just makes the curls "drop" a little, and still take a curling iron if I want more "boing." There are temporary 30 day treatments, others last about 6 months. The 30 day doesn't make a huge difference, but it will make blow drying time shorter. It's a nice entree into the keratin products, and maintains the flat iron even on rainy days. I remember when Laurie Partridge and Marsha Brady hair was the style. After one of the Keratin treatments where my hair wouldn't hold a curl, I was cured of wishing for that. I'm accustomed to big hair, and it's just not me in pin straight. You rock those curls Jlc! Here is another great Dove Campaign: Dove Curly Hair Campaign