Adult children living at home--expectations?
Hi--I have never posted here before, but I'm looking for some advice on handling my 21 y.o. son and 24 y.o. daughter. My daughter has just started her first full time job following college, but the pay is quite low (not enough to move out) The expenses she has is her cell phone, gas money and a repayment on a college loan ($10,000). She is a wonderful person but the problem I have is that her room is a disgusting mess. She won't throw anything away and it's driving me insane. I understand her right to privacy and respect it, however, I feel that as a room in my house, it should be kept clean. My son is not QUITE the slob. He has a job that pays minimum wage. He has no expenses beside gas for the car. He went to college for 2 years, but really didn't like it and didn't do well. He's usually thoughtful and considerate, but he can be quite disrespectful at times, They both get home late (from work) and, it seems to me, that they sleep the rest of the time (I know my son stays awake until 3 or 4, and when he wakes up he's on the computer and/or the phone until about an hour before he has to be at work) I have told them both that they need to earn their keep. So what to do? How do you get adults to live more productive lives at home? I'm sick of being a nag.