Our Buddy has left us

11 years ago

As I write this, the tears are flowing freely and I'm not ashamed to say so.

Back in November, Buddy was diagnosed with Cushing's Disease. He was put on medication for it and was doing fine, as you can tell by the picture of him I posted with the Christmas village.

He'd been doing fine until Monday. Monday evening he suddenly lost his appetite, developed a fever, had difficulty breathing and was completely exhausted.

Today, the vet discovered a large, rapidly growing cancerous tumor in his throat and concluded that there was nothing humane to do except to end his pain. We could have tried a steroid drip in an attempt to reduce the swelling and inflammation, but it would have just delayed the inevitable.

And so, Buddy has left and, for the first time in over 30 years, we are dog-less. Both George and I feel like our hearts have been ripped out. Everywhere we look we see him.

Needless to say there is a big empty spot in our hearts tonight.

Over a year ago, he suddenly decided that the back yard wasn't the right place to do his business and we had to go for walks 3 to 4 times a day. Not only did he lose weight, but I also lost 15 pounds. I promised Buddy I'd still walk every day like we had done for the past year. But it won't seem the same without him stopping every few feet to smell whatever new smell there was.

Comments (52)

ont_gal
11 years ago
awwww...so very very sorry about your Buddy-my own Bud passed with a lost of similar issues in 2008-I still miss him everyday-gentle hugs to you and George
Holly_ON
11 years ago
Sending a hug. They certainly leave a paw print on your heart.
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lydia1959
11 years ago
So sorry, I know how much it hurts. I'm glad that Buddy had a good life and a peaceful end. I hope one day you and George will be ready to open your hearts to a new dog.
joyfulguy
11 years ago
Such departures leave a big hole in our hearts.

Good wishes as you cope with your loss, secsteve.

ole joyful
rhizo_1 (North AL) zone 7
11 years ago
I'm so very sorry for your loss; it's a terrible ache, I know. There's a very special place in our hearts for beloved pets. Be sure to keep up with your walks ; that's a gift that Buddy left you with.
tami_ohio
11 years ago
I am so sorry Steve.
renee_b
11 years ago
There are no words of comfort, for our pets are like our children. They love us unconditionally and bring us so much joy during their lifetime. I'm sorry.
kayjones
11 years ago
I am sorry for the loss of your fur baby and best friend - may you find comfort in those loving memories you will always have of him.
pam_25f
11 years ago
I am very sorry for your loss. I understand your loss and grief. He looked like a wonderful dog.
alisande
11 years ago
I know how hard this is, and I'm so sorry.
glenda_al
11 years ago
(((((secsteve)))))
patti43
11 years ago
I'm so sorry for your pain, Secsteve. Sending hugs to you and George.
jackie643
11 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it is.
mojomom
11 years ago
So sorry, Steve. I know how much you are hurting.
terilyn
11 years ago
There are no words to describe this pain, they are such a huge part of our lives and hearts. I am so sorry.
grandmamary_ga
11 years ago
So sorry for your loss. So difficult to lose your pal, It will get easier.
hounds_x_two
11 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss. I know how much it hurts to lose a beloved pet.
Sending gentle hugs your way.
Georgysmom
11 years ago
Oh Lord, I know how hard it is. It's just awful. As painful as it is, I would never trade all those years of joy to avoid the pain. In time, when you're ready, I hope you'll open your heart to another great friend and loyal companion. You won't regret it. ((((Steve)))
katlan
11 years ago
I'm very sorry you lost your Buddy. We lost our sweet Jack just 5 weeks ago.Only time heals the ache. Oh how we love our sweet, loyal pets and hurt so badly when they're gone.
donna_loomis
11 years ago
As great as the pain is when we lose a beloved furry friend, the joy and comfort they give us while we have them makes it all worth while. My heart goes out to you in your time of loss.
secsteve
Original Author
11 years ago
Thanks all.

Both George and I know we're going to have a sleepless night tonight and probably a few more to come.

Right now we're both seeing him everywhere in the house which isn't unusual. I couldn't bring myself to put away his water bowl or his basket just yet. Plus there are sheets in the living room where he was spending more time that I need to gather up.

One of my favorite memories is when he'd get on the bed and lick George's head to get attention.

It's a great comfort to me to read all the comments here. I plan on going for that walk in the morning.
pammyfay
11 years ago
Oh, I'm so sorry...
I'm glad he found way to get you walking! In the morning, he'll be watching you, so slow down and smell the roses!

I found squeaky tennis balls throughout the house when my first pup passed. That wasn't as hard as taking down the kitchen gate, tho. But after a time, another little pup had great timing and became my girl. The house was just too quiet. Someday it'll be the right timing for you two, also.
Lily316
11 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss. Been there so many times and each time is harder. That's the way it is with pets we love. They don't live long enough. Maybe in a few months, you'll feel the need to spread the love to another dog.
Hellion
11 years ago
So sorry you lost your Buddy.
cheryl_ok
11 years ago
I'm so sorry
Jasdip
11 years ago
Ah Steve, I'm so sorry. Even when it's to be expected, because of an advanced age, it just kills us when it happens.

It will get easier to bear, though you might not think so now.
Keep your heart open to give a loving home to another "Buddy" in the future.

((((Steve, George and Buddy))))
FlamingO in AR
11 years ago
I am really sorry for your loss. I know that heartache and only time will ease it. Try to think about the good times, because you know Buddy would only be thinking of them, too!
fran1523
11 years ago
The worst pain of all. I'm so sorry but you did the right thing.
moonie_57 (8 NC)
11 years ago
Losing a fur kid is devastating. I'm so sorry.
JennaVaNowSC
11 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss. We lost Bella, one of our Boxers, on December 13th. We still have her sister Sasha (today is her 9th birthday) but losing our furbabies leaves such a hole in our hearts doesn't it? They bring such joy to our lives!!
kacram
11 years ago
I am so very sorry.
Marilyn Sue McClintock
11 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss, it is never easy. They are such a big part of our lives.

Sue
Georgysmom
11 years ago
Thinking about you today. I know your walk was sad today. It just takes time.
donna37
11 years ago
So sorry for your loss, it is very hard as they are a big part of the family. (((Steve)))
sandiefl
11 years ago
It is good that Buddy had such loving parents.I know the pain but as the others have said,you have the memories.Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Oakley
11 years ago
I know how you feel and I promise, it will get better. I mourned my Lily really hard, and I swore I'd never get another dog either. Six months later I caved, and got a dog of the same breed. A big part of me thinks Lily sent her to me. I still have Lily's toy in my drawer. You'll smile again.

Hang in there.
jannie
11 years ago
I'm so sorry.
minnie_tx
11 years ago
"Where has my little shadow gone
And that joyful bark when we came home.
In spring when blossoms fill the air
I'll look around and you'll be there.
In summer with the 'taters new
I'll save the little ones for you.
In autumn when the leaves are brown
I'll see you romping like a clown.
In winter when I'm on the air
I'll see you sleeping in my chair.
Sleep well, sweetheart, you are not gone.
You're in our hearts where you belong.
The loving place that's yours to own
Will always be for you alone."
taigen_gw
11 years ago
I'm so very sorry you have lost your loving companion. You did everything possible it seems. Wishing you the best.
secsteve
Original Author
11 years ago
Thanks minnie for the lovely poem.

Of course, while sitting here reading it to George I cried darn near through the whole thing.

This has been really hard on both us, mostly due to it being so unexpected. We are both feeling that empty, hallow feeling, but know it will eventually pass.

I took the rest of his meds and some extra food to the vets today and spoke with his assistant who had gone through the same thing. She told me the doc was feeling like he should have caught the possibility of there being cancer. I told her to tell him not to feel that way, he did all he could and we all know that unexpected things happen all the time.

In time, I'm sure we'll get another dog(s) just not right away. We need the time to grieve and then heal.
kittiemom
11 years ago
I'm so very sorry.
samkaren
11 years ago
Secsteve
I know what you are going through....the pain and loss. DH and I lost our Dusty in October. He was with us for 19 years and was a sweet gentle furbaby/kitty. Five years before that we lost our EKO at 19 y/o too. What helped me was that the pain eased.....the tears stopped....but the loving memories will never go away. Though it is hard right now you did the most humane and loving thing for your Buddy.

Hugs to you and George at this time.

SamKaren
your resident DJ
petra_gw
11 years ago
Sincere condolences to both of you, I know very well how much it hurts.
minnie_tx
11 years ago
Secsteve

I knew you'd cry and it helped to getsome of the pain out. Most of my fur friends went in my arms while I was whispering a prayer to them and telling them about how much fun they were going to have.
secsteve
Original Author
11 years ago
Tonight I got the nicest surprise from the kids down the street.

You may remember I posted about them surprising us at Christmas with a huge plate of home made cookies.

The door bell rang and there were the three of them with a small plate of cookies. The oldest young said "Mom told us about your dog and we wanted you to have these. We thought he was the sweetest dog and know you will miss him. We hope these help make it a little bit better."

Needless to say, I lost it big time. I gave all three of them a hug and told them to tell their mom she's doing a super job with them. I had told her about Buddy on Wednesday when I was walking for him and she told me her kids would be sad to hear that.

I never expected anything like this. Really made me feel good.
Georgysmom
11 years ago
Good golly, I just lost it big time just reading it. What wonderful kids and mom, too. I know what you mean about the suddenness of it all. That's what happened with my JD. It's always difficult but when it's unexpected it just really rips you apart. I'm proof positive that time does heal the wounds.

This post was edited by georgysmom on Thu, Feb 21, 13 at 20:55
minnie_tx
11 years ago
Really made me feel good.

Makes us fell good too.so glad there are nice caring people in this world and that they live close to you
rhizo_1 (North AL) zone 7
11 years ago
Oh, I remember the Christmas story. They really liked Buddy and you know that they feel so sad. Such a lovely thing to do. Sharing tears with you on reading this.
liz
11 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss...you made the ultimate sacrifice...let him go to be free of pain and suffering...it doesn't help but in time I hope your grief is replaced by good memories...We lost a 12 year old collie in November...i'm still numb...
samkaren
11 years ago
What a sweet thing to do.....just shows that people do care about each other.

Our Buddy has left us

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