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Mean to my Husband

19 years ago

I have been utterly verbally mean and vicious to my sweet husband in the past few months. On top of hot flashes, anxiety attacks, painful sex and crying jags, it seems that I've now become a monster as well. Hope the endocrinologist has some answers for me next week, otherwise I may become divorce material!

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Comments (11)

shotzy52
19 years ago
Dear Gayle, I am very interested in what the endocrinologist has to say. I hope he helps you. Never thought I would have this much trouble with vaginal dryness. Doesnt make me feel very sexy, and you are so correct, sex hurts! I find myself being very hurtful to my husband. It seems to make issues that we were just hiding or ignoring come right on up for air. Good Luck. Let us know.
User
19 years ago
Me too! I try to avoid sex all together and it is not sitting well with DH.
Do you both have periodic itching that gets worse after sex? If so, what are you using?
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The above posts are kind of insensitive and not very helpful to destini181...I really think that people come on here and post when we are very upset and have no one else we can talk to or get unbias opinions from and I think people should be a bit more understanding of the position posters are in...I know myself I have been scared to post and have received some comments which are a bit rude and not understanding... I am new here as well but I do A LOT of reading from posts even from years ago... Mkroopy's advice is good to just ignore the behavior... If your husband's daughter doesn't like you... which she is making very clear, she may not be over the divorce of her mother and father... And obviously does not have any respect for her father's decison to marry you... Either way, shes 24 so she will continue to have this view about you most likely.. and when she is ready.. (ie if you two last a long time) she has to come around. If her father chooses you as his partner regardless of age, previous children etc she has to respect that or basically not be around him... You should kind of try to put yourself in her shoes a little bit, I think it would make you understand her anger and maybe you wouldnt be so upset about it. She is immature clearly and is possibly doing things to upset you purposely or she is just an insensitive person and doesnt care about other people's feelings. Either way, you have your own immediate family in the house with your children, one on the way etc so really, don't sweat it. If you read other posts... it is for sure a good idea to make sure that any really rude or unacceptable behavior towards you is intervened by your husband.. It seems like an on going problem for blended families on here that the step mothers are always fighting their husbands to stand up for them. So I would say make sure to nip that in the butt ASAP! If we let them slide we have really horrible problems later on. She may even be looking for the negative attention.. and by you freaking out or getting emotional she is getting a reaction. Just ignore it all as mkroopy says. If she doesn't want her child around you or the grandfather than who cares. I mean really let her win and say what she wants... just keep your life, direction and the immediate people in your life your focus. These daughters these days are out of control.... Just a side note* my dad is with a woman who is his 3rd woman after my mother. Every single one of the woman he chose I have always shown respect to. Even at a young age. Regardless of my personal opinions of them, the current gf he has now I don't really like the things she does, or the way she acts sometimes and my dad and I talk quite often. He will be upset or hurt and vent to me. But I never let that take over. Everyone is human. If dad likes her and she treats him well to the best of her abilities I'm cool with that. Even if I didn't like her at all and couldnt stand the sight of her.. I would never put my dad in a position like that... He's a big boy he can handle his own decisions and if he needs moral support I am there.... I really think it is the way these kids are being brought up these days with ZERO respect for elders... Goodluck and I hope it all works out... Try not to stress too much with the pregnancy and all! :)
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shotzy52
19 years ago
Oh yeah, I have itching, it is borderline burning. But goes away in a couple of days. I do know some women in their 50's, that dont have this problem, but they are single:-) What does that mean exactly, I am not sure, maybe more foreplay, excitment and perhaps do not feel the need to make everyone happy all the time. My obyn says I need more sex to make it better (she is 36!) On what to use, it seems like the estrogen creme make things more sensitive for a few days. And it is messy. I drink lots of water and wear cotton panties, or at the very least cotton crotch. I will ask this question. My clitoris is so much more tender and smaller than it used to be. Does anyone have that problem? I am sure men go thru some sort of menopause, but I am struggling with being kind when normally I am.
User
19 years ago
Haven't noticed a size change, but it sure itches!
shotzy52
19 years ago
I love this website, it makes me feel normal again. Truly. Not that misery loves company or anything. LOL
matti5
19 years ago
I can relate so well to this topic. I started experiencing dryness and itching several months ago. I thought it was a yeast infection and treated it as such (hadn't had one in 20 years), but itching persisted. I saw my gyno and she did a culture which was showed normal yeast, but a slight increase with B strep. We all have it, but hormone levels can increase it. I notice my itching gets worse just before my period and also after sex for a day or two.

My gyno prescribed borax suppositories to help balance the vaginal environment. I have not tied them yet.

I agree with Shotzy52, this website makes me feel normal again. Thank you all!
shotzy52
19 years ago
Matti, let us know about the suppository, I am interested! Thanks, Shotzy
User
19 years ago
I have never heard of this Borax! My gyno also prescribes cortisone ointment, but it isn't doing the trick anymore.

I am wondering if the new Rephresh is the same type treatment as the borax? It's suppose to balance the PH in the vagina. I started to buy some today in the grocery store, but chickened out.
carla17
19 years ago
Gaylee, years ago I was in a beauty salon and listening to this woman tell her stylist about "wanting to kill people". Unfortunately, sometimes I feel that way. I think it's hard to be nice when your body is playing tricks on you. I'm also diabetic and am told it makes you crankier too. I don't see how it is possible for me to get crankier, LOL. Hang in there. If men could read this forum they might understand!

Carla
cheerful1_gw
19 years ago
I've been so cranky, can't sleep, hot flashes getting worse. I wish men could understand what we're going through. I don't think my husband understands just how bad it is.
hunter_tx
19 years ago
Men don't understand because they don't have high levels of estrogen. The have primarily testosterone which tends to make the personality more forthright and stable. They couldn't understand even if they wanted to because they are not generally emotionally-based creatures. Women, whether we want to admit it or not, are more emotional. I think that's a good thing. It's part of what gives us our nurturing personalities and helps make us good moms. Hang in there, ladies. The roller-coaster ride will eventually come to a peaceful end.
Mrs H

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