I was 40 when I had DD, so unfortunately I'm going to be doing all of the things on both lists when I'm in my 50's! I just keep waiting for someone to ask if I'm her grandma. Maybe when I get grayer.

What was I thinking? I'll have a teenage girl when I'm in my mid-50's!

ajsmama, I'm right there with you! My DS is 6, and although no one has asked me yet, I sure hope they don't really think I'm his grandma.

hhireno, I do relate to a couple, although I know most women can relate to most of what you listed. I particularly like that I don't care what most people think anymore and I try to only do meaningful things with my life. I think that is a good thing to pass on to my DS also. I do, however, feel I need to keep in style, and I like doing so anyway. I know I was always so proud of how my mom always dressed in style and dressed me in style. For some reason, she thought that was important. My mom still always looks cute now. Always makeup and dressed nice but comfortable in her 60's.

Well I'm fifty-ahem and I've got a 17 year-old and an 8 year-old. I second that "what was I thinking" and raise you a "I must be nuts". But I am in total agreement with:
We no longer care what anybody thinks of us, we are who we are and that's not likely to change now
We dress for comfort slightly ahead of style.
We recognize what is really important to us and spend more time doing that and less time on things that don't really matter in the grand scheme of things
We're still alive and enjoying life!

I'm not yet in my 50s, but I'm fast approaching. I can definitely relate to many of these things, and something else that I think happens as we get older is that we don't care to hold grudges anymore. We also know to choose our battles wisely and not to blow our stacks everytime we feel wronged. We have more empathy and understanding, and find it easier to accept others just as they are, warts and all.

Just thought of a couple more things!

We don't waste precious energy trying to change someone else. How I thought I really could in my younger days, though!

We know how to graciously accept a compliment without feeling as though we need to make a derisive comment about ourselves in reply, and we know how to offer a genuine compliment to others.

Aunt Jen, excellent point about the maturity to take and give a compliment. Oh and the grudges! Who has time for that now?

Olliesmom, I said comfort slightly edges out style. Unlike 20 yr olds, I do not wear sweat pants unless I am on my way to, at, or returning from the gym. Same for sneakers. I now tend more towards comfortable but not dowdy shoes. My high, high heel days are over. Still wearing boot cut jeans, just dark wash and no rips or tears. Actually, my income now is much better so my quality of dress is better - another bonus to being "older".

ajsmama - don't get grayer.

nan53 - poor nan, a 17 and an 8? Yikes.

My biggest complaint about aging (so far anyway)is the need for bifocals. It just isn't fair. I've had bad distance vision for so long but at least I could read a menu or my cellphone screen. I used to laugh at my parents but now I see (ha! I wish) it just isn't funny, it's annoying. Now I just have to answer my phone and hope for the best. Forget texting if I don't have bifocals handy.

I spend a lot of time trying to be comfortable and stylish, and maintain my weight, etc.... that's the physical aspect.

Mentally and spiritually, I love being over 50 ; less anguish, doubts, and
more confidence.

I think being over 50 makes you step it up a notch, gives you a certain sense of urgency, I mean this in a good way.

Wow, Mitch, that's a glowing endorsement of the over 50 years! I aspire to be in your very spiritual shoes someday! (Will be 47 soon!)

ALL these positive remarks are great to read, study & remember. We live in a youth-obsessed culture that doesn't shed light on the good stuff about growing older. (Notice I said growing, not just getting!) One is active the other passive.

We don't waste precious energy trying to change someone else. How I thought I really could in my younger days, though!

I have been trying to hammer that point home to my daughter most of her life. Unfortunately she seems to be hung up on a guy who who would be perfect if only...

I keep telling her that if he isn't the one the way he is now, then he is never going to be the one.

I once heard that men marry women and are disappointed when they change, and women marry men and are disappointed when they don't change.

hhireno, really it is lucky nan =D

hmmm, another "older" mother I guess. DD just started college and I will soon be 50. Similarly, most of my girlfriends and our couple friends had their children later, so 50 does not seem to be what it was in generations before me.

Sadly, attended a friend's father's memorial on Saturday, but our friend is my age and has two little girls, ages 1 and 3, first marriage but he was very particular in his search for the perfect mate. He found her and she is absolutely lovely and was well worth waiting for IMHO. I can't yet say I am buying sympathy cards in bulk thankfully. I am noticing that my parents' generation are taking great interest in preventative healthcare, taking good care of themselves, eating clean - carefully examining labels so as to not be eating foods with much in the way of preservatives. They take natural supplements and vitamins vs. pharmaceuticals (sp?), and getting daily exercise. Still very vital in their mid/late 70's. Really, most look much younger than their stated age.

It was my FIL who was concerned about his coumadin levels! Have to say though, other than a minor blip with a rapid heart beat which was resolved by a cardiac ablation, he's in great shape and practices yoga daily. A strict vegetarian long before it was as popular as it is now, he pays strict attention to his diet and probably eats healthier than we do!

Never truly cared much what anyone thought of me, even less by the time I was 30.

I don't know if I will ever chose comfort over style as evidenced by the darn blister from my to die for shoes I splurged on for the memorial. lol True style for me is timeless. I was never one to spend my hard-earned money on the trend of the moment. Give me a good dress & jacket suit, and I will make it work for 10 years!

I am most interested in the discounts, however. I haven't been offered any!?! lol

Great post!

Nan,

I hear you when you say you are lucky. I have a 19 year old, a 17 year old and an 11 year old. I tell people I currently going through all possible parenting scenarios! College, Sr. High School and Middle School.

But, I have to say, it is so nice having that young one still being so innocent and interested in simple things, and wanting to hang with his parents vs. driving, girls and staying out too late!

I'm 52 and loving life. Don't want to use 'we' because I can't speak for anyone but myself but...

I'm old enough to have wild memories. And I'm old enough to appreciate the calm, quiet and routine life I now live that gives me a chance to let my mind drift to wild memories that make me smile.

I'm old enough to know, mostly, which hills are worth dying on and which aren't.

I'm old enough to know that change happens. If everything is going perfectly, I know to enjoy it while it lasts. If everything is in the dumper, I know not to despair because it will get better.

I'm old enough to have a 20+ year successful marriage.

I'm old enough to understand that a 20+ year successful marriage is a very important achievement, not to be taken lightly or for granted.

I'm old enough to know that while I can and should take care of myself, pretty much nobody is actually looking that closely at me so as long as I'm neat,clean and presentable it's good enough.

I'm old enough to know that if I decline an invitation, unless I'm the only guest I probably won't kill the party by not being there.

I'm old enough to know that it's just fine to decline an invitation by saying "Sorry, I have plans."

I'm old enough not to feel guilty if I decline an invitation by invoking plans when my plan is to sit in my jammies watching tv.

I'm old enough that if I start reading a book, watching a show or taking up an activity and don't like it...I stop. Because I'm old enough to know that I want to use my time in ways that make me happy, not to fulfill some imaginary obligation.

I'm old enough to be grateful for a birthday on which I am showered with good wishes instead of gifts.

I'm old enough to understand that a birthday filled with good wishes IS a magnificent gift.

Ann

I'm not in my 50s... just peeked in here to see what I have to look forward to. ;)
But just wanted to join your club, Caroleoh, since I have a 17 year old, 14 year old, and 8 year old. I often say I'm "covering all the schools" since I have one in high school, one in middle school, and one in elementary. I have to admit, as I'm getting prepared to send my oldest off to college next fall, I'm pretty happy to still have my little girl to keep me feeling "young"!

Runninginplace, Oh such wise words and I agree with what you say. I am 71 and pretty much do what I want, when I want and if I want. I really have no one to answer to but myself and a higher power. I'm reasonably content. I did make it through my 50's with five children and lived to tell about it. Now I am old enough to look back on those years and wish I would have done more fun things with my kids because they were leaving home when I was that age.
For yourself, just be the best you can be and enjoy your life as you never know what's ahead. They're all good years and don't waste them because you can't get them back.