As far as diet goes, a lot of alt med sources try to give the impression that mainstream medicine ignores the role of diet in disease while on the other hand they pay proper attention to it (which usually means promoting unproven supplements and fad diets). The reality is that proper diet has long been emphasized by mainstream medicine as a key part of preventing and treating heart disease (and numerous other medical conditions). A recent review by the American Dietetic Association stressed the following keys to a heart-healthy diet: "The panel examined the state of current research on the effectiveness of foods, nutrients and food components in reducing cardiovascular disease risk factors while also meeting a person's nutrient needs, and identified areas where further research is needed. "Numerous dietary factors/nutrients have been identified that affect (cardiovascular disease) risk factors," the researchers write. "An individualized dietary pattern is recommended to optimize CVD risk factor reduction while meeting nutrient needs." The review identifies effective "dietary considerations" including a diet that: Is low is saturated fatty acids, trans fatty acids and dietary cholesterol; Is "ample" in total dietary fiber with emphasis on soluble fiber; Includes fat-free/low-fat dairy foods and/or other calcium/vitamin D-rich sources; Is rich in vitamins, minerals, phytochemicals and antioxidants from multiple servings of fruits and vegetables and low in sodium; May include plant sterols and stanols in high-risk individuals; and Achieves a healthful body weight and calorie balance with the recommended dietary intervention by increasing physical activity and maintaining adequate calorie intake. " Here's another good article on the basics of a heart-healthy diet.

Linda, Just from the research I've done, I believe mom is in Stage 5 of the Alzheimer's staging (1 to 7). She was "diagnosed" with Alz/-dementia two year's ago...at that time, she had an MRI, blood tests and a full psych exam by a pscych dr who specializes in dementia and Alz...after that evaluation, she diagnosed her at moderate stage. It was then that she was placed on Aricept, so she's been on Aricept for two years and the combination of Aricept and Namenda for about 1 1/2 years. You said your mom was fine...just curious...what do you mean by fine? I guess I'm confused because you said she was on Aricept... At this point, my mom does very little for herself. Probably easier to tell you what she can do rather than what she cannot. She gets out of bed herself, washes up and dresses (I have everything out for her in the bathroom...laid out exactly where she wants it to be). She goes to the bathroom herself and so far is continent - she's had a couple of accidents, but I think that's all they were, just accidents. She is able to swallow her medication and eat on her own (her meals are prepared for her and she is served and her pills are given to her). I've notice over the past few weeks she has a tough time using a knife and has at times resorted to using her fingers. I do help her to undress at night because she is SO TIRED and help her to bed. Walking is a problem because her balance is so bad; she has a walker to use around the house but she goes from wanting to use it to not wanting to even see it ("it makes me feel like an old lady!"). She is able to communicate, but not long conversations..just short thoughts... I think what I find the most difficult about caregiving is not taking care of Mom, but feeling that I'm all alone. My sisters are of little help and truth be told, my husband is not much of a help, although if you ask him, he thinks he is, so maybe it's a matter of perception, who knows. I find myself getting very depressed, but this comes and goes. What's been really bothering me lately is I just cannot understand why mom's friends and family have stopped calling and seeing her? I know it is very difficult to have a phone conversation with her; after all, she remembers nothing, but that doesn't mean they can't call and tell her about THEIR day...I don't know, maybe it's me...it's like everyone has written her off. I have thought about writing to her friends and somehow, very nicely, suggesting that they come by and have lunch with her or take her out to lunch or just come for a visit...I'd love some input on this...thanks, Mimi

Clare- I am so sorry that you are dealing with this especially since it's long distance. The POA and the DNR are important documents and I think all the siblings should have a copy. I'm responsible for my Father who moved in with us when my Mom died 3 years ago. He made out a new will and POA and DNR and I gave copies to both of my brothers. I didn't want any misunderstanding if something were to happen to Dad and I had to make important decisions. You mentioned surgery but you didn't say what the doctor's opinion was, what the risk factors are or how much improvement might be achieved. I think you need more information before you try to help your Mom. Exactly what surgery has been proposed? If your brother is withholding information maybe you or your sister could visit and take her on one of her appointments. Maybe you would feel better if you were able to spend some time with your Mom now. My Dad just had a pacemaker implanted. His heart was only pumping at 20% because the lower 2 chambers were not pumping in the proper rhythm. Plus his valves are worn out so half of the blood that was pumped out fell right back into the chamber. He has terrible circulation, can't walk without a walker, can only walk about 50 feet without resting, one carotid is completely blocked and the other only has 10% blood flow. He was so short of breath he couldn't dress himself. The pacemaker has made a huge difference - the shortness of breath is completely gone, his heart is in correct rhythm, his fingertips are no longer blue, he bathes and dresses himself, and his skin tone is pink again. He still can't walk far but that's because of peripheral artery disease. Mentally he is very alert, the procedure was short and fairly low risk. So it was an easy decision. However no one was in favor of more extensive surgery especially my Dad. And he is a 'ticking time bomb' but as he says 'who isn't at age 89?' I hope everything works out for you.

Just built a 2 story retirement home. The only rooms upstairs are a small MBR and small MBa. I like going upstairs to bed and I like perching up there on the windowseat to look out at the world. And I'm also of the use it or lose it school. But I had a friend who became disabled in his 30s while living in an old house with upstairs bedrooms and only a powder room on the first floor. They had to add a complicated lift to the tune of what I recall as 10K, but it was worth it not to move. Decided then we would never have a house that was not at least livable on one level. So we have a curbless shower downstairs in a larger bathroom, wide-ish halls and doors, and one barrier-free entry. A guest room on the first floor that we could use if we couldn't get upstairs. But actually, the location of the place, far from medical services of any complexity, is not suitable for anyone who is too feeble, anyway. So that was our compromise. It also means that our house is "visitable" on the first floor for people with different levels of mobility.