I had a very nice day. Julie called @7AM and yelled 'Happy Birthday, Mom! Happy Birthday, Mom! You know who this is, right?' into the message system. I don't do 7AM any day. Then Julie and Rachel came over, and I gave Julie a massage for her Mother's Day present. Rachel stayed for her nap while Julie did some errands. Went to class, got my Thoracic & Lumbar Spine final back(100% on both parts(it is actually 2 tests and I got the 100% on both parts(I got a 'Very Good!!!!' on 2 essays))). The girls in class provided a dinner break party of subs, fresh fruit, chips and salsa, brownies and a double layer chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. All in all a great day. Thanks. Jan, who doesn't feel as old as the calendar says.... =;-0

I've spent a few days in court lately, unfortunately (my husband is a victim & witness) in a case that keeps getting postponed. I'm sorry, but if the judge is anything at all like the one we've been observing, I wouldn't be so sure. We saw a guy get over a $1000 in assorted fines plus community service for shoplifting $21 worth of merchandise. If the 'victim' wants to press charges, the judge may have no discretion but to follow the law and impose the required penalties. You say you've got a drs appt. for her--that's good, and I'd make sure that she gets to the dr. and you have a diagnosis in hand (if there is one along the lines of dementia) before going to court, but I'd strongly recommend that you see your lawyer for a couple of things. First and foremost, you HAVE to have her properly represented in this case, and secondly, if she is becoming incapable of handling her own affairs, there are legal steps you need to take--if she'll sign a financial and medical POA, that will help. If she's unwilling, you may have to go for guardianship. Either way, you're describing a parent who needs some supervision--for her own health and safety. As to what will happen with the dr? Since she hasn't been in some time, apparently, she's going to need a complete physical. In the office, he'll probably check her blood pressure, pulse, etc. He probably will send her for bloodwork and possibly a urinalysis--to check for things like diabetes, UTI infection (which can in the elderly, ape dementia and create a lot of confusion), high cholesterol, etc. He's probably going to ask her questions that are designed to indicate her mental acuity--unfortunately, there's no actual test (bloodwork, X-Ray, etc) for dementia. He may prescribe one of the medications that are helpful in slowing (but can't cure) dementia. You're going to want to make sure that you have yourselves listed as people the dr. can legally talk to (HYPPA), and you're going to want to make sure that one of you always accompanies her so that you understand and follow the drs instructions. As I've been through a lot of this with my mom, aunt and MIL (various health/elder issues)--I'd suggest that it's probably time to consider having at the very least, some help in several days a week. Home health aids--good ones, at least--are worth their weight in gold. They help with personal needs like bathing, will do laundry, cleaning, cooking, shopping--and most importantly, visit. They're an extra pair of eyes to help catch minor problems before they become major issues. Depending upon your mom's eventual diagnosis, health aids may be covered by her insurance/medicare. But even if they aren't, they're worth the price. It may be, that the time is coming when you may have to make the decision that mom needs assisted living or nursing home care. Know that's not what any of us want to face, but it's better to start looking around before you need one, than to wait until the need is critical. Being prepared ahead of time, is going to take a lot of stress off your shoulders when that time comes. I know you're going through a lot right now--but you're going to learn a lot about yourself--you're going to find strengths you didn't know you had. You're going to redefine your relationship with your mom--and that's not necessarily a bad thing. Just hang in there, and get through a day at a time, make sure the first things you handle are mom's immediate health issues and her legal woes. Good luck with all that.

Great pictures! Sweet hand pictures and wow- that morning glory!

Great pictures Clare and you are so blessed to still have your Mom. Shame on your brothers - 3 of my older brothers were the same way and they lived in the same city. Looks like you all had a great time and your Mom sure doesn't look like she is 90 years old. Happy Birthday to your Mom. Anne