Yes, Shannon, he's holding up pretty well. He keeps saying he figures he knows what the release date is supposed to be, and if he gets out sooner, that will be a blessing. I get to visit him frequently now, and he finally got his phone list approved, so he can call. I saw him again yesterday and we had a nice long, chatty visit. He's getting along well enough, I just still fear for him, but I get the overall impression that he's doing fine and is no danger. So far the people I've met, visiting families and the guards, all seem to be nice. Yesterday was kind of sad...they let us in by groups, it's a weird situation, you have to go thru a metal detector and remove your shoes, like it used to be at the airport. You must wear specific types of clothing...nothing blue, no shorts or skirts higher than 2" off the knee, necklines must be no lower than 2" from the collar bone, nothing form fitting, etc. You can bring in a clear plastic bag with up to $15 in quarters and up to 5 photographs. And you cannot bring in handkerchiefs or anything other than your ID and the key to the locker, where you can lock up any valuables (car keys for me). You also have your hand stamped and they allow a group of up to 10 at a time to go in. You walk down a long hall, down a ramp, where they scan your stamp, then the barred door moves and you enter a cell-like structure. The guard waits till everyone is in, the door closes and they wait for the barred door at the other end of the hallway to close, then another barred door opens to the hallway. You are escorted down the hall where the guard unlocks a door and you may enter into the visiting area. Jon is in privileged visiting, where you can have face to face visits. The area where it's like in movies, with the glass and phones is for a different level of offender. There are red chairs and grey chairs, with a small table between them; visitors must sit in the red, the inmates on the gray. Inmates are not allowed to use the vending machines, but you can buy them sodas & snacks. There are also games and a childs play area. So I get to hug him before and after the visits, and the visits can be up to 3 hours! Anyway, it was kind of sad because in the group I went in with yesterday, it was all Moms. There were a couple of women my age, and their sons were the same age range as Jon, in fact, Jon said that one kid in the room was a kid he'd gone to school with (but they're not friends). So, it was bittersweet. I just count the days till I can have him home, but it's so good to be able to see him and hug him and see his beautiful face and hear his laugh. I can't wait for his sisters to be approved, so they can see him too. It will do them so much good to see him.

It is true in my state of Georgia. They are legally protected from liability as long as they use the proper language on their contracts and inspections forms and letters. We had a retired engineer home inspector inspect our current house. His incompetence was breathtaking in its scope and depth. Just ONE example: The previous owners built two decks on either side of a second story screened porch with steps down on both sides to the back yard. Each deck was one step down from the porch. It so happened that the exhaust pipe for the condenser of our main 5 ton Trane furnace projected through the back brick wall where they put the step down, so the previous owners simply HAD IT CAPPED OFF by the idiot who built their (unpermitted) decks and the step built over it. They did not run the pipe elsewhere, just capped it off. The inspector, whose "specialty" was HVAC systems, did not notice this, and said in his report that the furnace was working normally. The condenser exhaust pipe was in place in the basement but there was nothing coming through to the outside. A few months later, when we went to turn on the furnace for the winter it would not heat appropriately, used much more gas than it should have, etc. the HVAC contractor who came out told us we were very lucky we called right away, for reasons ranging from personal safety, code violations, further damage to the system, etc. He put this in writing and documented what he did to relocate the pipe -- at a cost of about $500--- just so we could recover the actual cost of the repair. Our letter to the inspector cited his disclaimer and our attorney confirmed that he was ONLY liable for the cost of his inspection, not any damages or repairs resulting from his erroneous report and/or incompetence. This post was edited by kswl on Sat, Jul 19, 14 at 8:53

I really feel for you, it seems as if your heart is in the right place and that you have alot of love to give those in your life. Your boyfriend is letting you down I feel. He is not only the link/bridge between you and his son. He is also the barrier between you and his ex and should be protecting you more from her and not leave you so exposed to her bad behaviour. He is also not enabling or creating that many opportunities for you to bond with his son. 1) It is his job to do the discipline/parenting etc. 2) You need opportunities to have a bit of fun with the boy rather than him relying on the neighbour's. That is just lazy parenting on dad's behalf, you need time to be a family together. 3) He should deal with the ex. End of. Keep out of the way, let him see to her. And he doesn't need to tell you every gory detail if it is emotionally draining for you. 4) Talk to you boyfriend about his bond with the baby and perhaps about getting his son involved with the baby too, helping out, etc. The big picture is so frustrating, as I have a similar situation. My bf's ex is absolutely toxic, an evil, depressing person, not happy unless she is causing chaos, making the children upset and trying to control everyone. You will not change you bf's ex, nor can I mine. What you have to change is how he deals with her. And negative things that are said, that happen, can be dealt with directly with your bf's son (in an age appropriate way). If inroads are not made, nor opportunites to bond with his son created by bf, this situation will only get worse. And I've read enough on here and experienced enough to know that the step mum usually gets the raw deal no matter how hard she tries and it can be a relationship breaker unfortunately. Hugs.

I am a step-mom of a now-26 year old, whom I "got" at 8 years old and was also abandoned by his mother (but raised by his father), and I say go to the party, but DEFINITELY talk with your husband about it first and let him know how you feel. He needs to step up here and stick by you a little more during the get together. Stop being a bystander with this family you willingly married into - interact with them and you just might find you enjoy their company. Even if you don't enjoy their company, unless something really egregious happens, you really should attend the big events. (I always attend holidays, birthdays, the random visit, etc., but don't go every visit time my husband does.) On the matter of this child being introduced specifically as DH's son, I'm sure they all assume that it's understood. I mean, you know he is DH's son, and they all know you know, correct? It's super hard - I know that first hand - but you married into the situation and I think you need to make more of an effort.