I'm so sad...

13 years ago

DH is stopping by the vet to make an appointment for Dubs later this afternoon. It's time to put him out of his misery and I'm feeling so sad I just can't hardly deal with the depth of it.

Dubs is not eating much. I have to hand/force feed him. He's unstable on his feet and just isn't himself. He's skin and bones and it's become increasingly difficult to get his pain meds down him.

I wish I could have the vet come here but DH doesn't want to spend the extra money ($300. more). Plus the come-to-your-house vet won't take his body so we'd have to transport him to the local vet for cremation afterwards and I'm not sure I could bear that.

Dubs has been such an ambassador of love. The most intuitive dog I've ever known and a real hero who saved the life of a little one at the river.

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Comments (31)

jakabedy
13 years ago
I'm so sorry.
natal
13 years ago
My heart goes out to you. It's such a tough decision, but in the end you know it's the right thing to do. A final act of love.

We were blessed when it was time to let Jake & Mort go. Our vet came to the house and took their bodies to be cremated afterward. Not sure if our present vet would be willing to do that.
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If it is a fairy well rooted cutting with more than one cane and there is a little peace of wood with a "eye" that can sprout a new shoot it might survive. If the rootsystem is good, it might also sprout from the root. If it was a very new cutting chances are slim. You could also take cuttings and root your self. It costs no more than the potting soil and perhaps some rooting hormone, but rooting hormone is not really needed. Does roses in you area do well ownroot? Some roses do very well ownroot even in areas with long and cold winters. Take a cane from your rose of choice that are in full bloom or has just bloomed. The small eyes that are placed where the leafs are joint to the cane are suppose to be a bit swollen but not yet become a new shoot. The theory is that then the cane is full of energy for growth and roots more easily. Cut of the flowers / spent flowers on the top, save two or three pairs of leafs, let there be two or three eyes (where you have taken the leafs of) under the soil and three above. Stick the cane in a pot with ordinary watered potting soil and have a clear plastic bag over it, sort of a mini green house. It is best if the plastic do not touch the leafs too much, and the leafs could be trimmed a bit. Place the pot in a shady place, no direct sun at all is preferable. It works very well in june and july when the temperature is warm both day and night. Not much water is needed because of the plastic bag, but the soil must not dry. After two-three weeks the cutting will show if roots have developed. If is still looks healthy after three weeks chances are good. If the pot is not too big white new roots will stick out at the bottom of the pot. When you notice roots have formed it is time to adjust the plant to normal air. Cut of a corner of the plastic bag and let it breath a couple of days, then the other corner and then take the whole plastic bag of. When it has grown a bit it can be put in the ground. It is best to protect against the harshest hottest sun at first. Taking cuttings is very easy, just take a few and don't give up. It is not much work, the pot just stands in a shady spot and the plant does most of the work.
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What a horrible, familiar feeling it is when your actions inadvertently cause harm to something. Been there, done that. In fact I so hate the thought that I might smash a frog or toad at night on the road that I have taken up carrying a minnow bucket in the passenger side floorboard just in case I need to relocate a few of the little dears. It's the stuff you feel you could have avoided that really gets to you the worst. You didn't let Suzi out to purposely kill the poor thing, and she certainly can't be expected to act like anything other than the dog she is. I think you need to know that what's important here is that you are honestly affected by what took place, but in a positive way. I see you taking steps and making the effort to insure that it doesn't happen again, or at least as seldom as possible. On the other hand, you COULD have reacted like the young men did that Jenny mentioned, which at least was indifference to the loss of life and at worst a macabre fascination with it. I hate to get caught over-generalizing here, but my first thought was, well , that's young boys for ya. Too much @$%#@!!! X-BOX. But isn't Suzi a stray that you took in?? See, there you go....you try to do what seems right and you still have moments where things just get crazy and confusing. At least you still made a positive difference in her life by giving her a home....I still say it all comes down to Chaos...if you hadn't taken her in, she'd likely be who knows where, maybe dead in an alley somewhere, but she wouldn't have caught the young squirrel. But possibly Suzi, in being a potential predator to the other squirrels, is keeping them on their toes and alert to danger, and in doing so is providing them with better survival skills. Or maybe it's late and I'm not making a lick of sense.... Cathy, we know from your posts that you always try to do right by all living things, so don't bang your head over something you couldn't possibly have forseen. A bunch of jingle bells on the door that you use to let her out will do the trick nicely...they do learn. If you still aren't sure and you have the time, maybe you could do a walk-about and check for stragglers. It's hard sometimes...... hugs dg
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Mona, so sorry this is happening to you and your family. It really is frustrating beyond belief when things are so far outside of our control yet impact us so greatly. I'm afraid this kind of breakup is quite common now--I know two husbands who began online affairs with ex girlfriends via Facebook, and one of my female coworkers left her husband just last year for her ex boyfriend who reconnected with her on Facebook and then started texting, etc. In these cases, anyone could/did see signs of problems in the marriages before the online affairs started. One of the husbands who cheated, I have to say that no one could be blamed for leaving his wife--she was awful. Still, that's not the way to do it, especially with kids involved. One of the divorced spouses got remarried SIX WEEKS after the divorce was final. My friend went from being married, knowing nothing about the affair to being divorced and having her kids spend weekends with a complete stranger *and the stranger's equally unknown children* in 90 days. As for meeting that 'one special person' who is perfect for you.... my mom did that and divorced my dad to be with him. It's now 30 years later and yes, she has been blissfully married ever since. They truly are soulmates. Unfortunately for my sibs and I, our stepdad was far from being OUR soulmate, and we all left home in our midteens as a result. So, two people happy, but four people unhappy. I'm absolutely not against people who are unhappy separating and starting over, but speaking from experience, hardly anyone honestly looks at what it's doing to their kids.
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nancybee_2010
13 years ago
natal is right, it's a final act of love. It's so hard, though- you feel like your heart is breaking to lose your precious friend.

I keep my dog's ashes in a box with a plaster impression of his pawprint and it is comforting to me to have it.

My thoughts are with you.
stinky-gardener
13 years ago
I'm so sorry, Golddust. This must be such a sad, difficult time for you! You'll be in my prayers, and I'm sending you a big hug!
amysrq
13 years ago
Oh, Golddust, what a sad thing to hear. I am really sorry. I have never lost a pet and these stories just break my heart a little.

Hold each other close and just breathe. You're doing the right thing....the last gift of love.
awm03
13 years ago
Sorry to hear about the loss of your wonderful little friend, golddust. Please give Dubs a loving hug for me & know that we are here for you. I wish pets lived longer.
Bumblebeez SC Zone 7
13 years ago
Please know you will be in my thoughts and prayers as you go through this wretched thing.
mahatmacat1
13 years ago
(((golddust, Dubs and family))) We'll be thinking of you today...

If it consoles at all, which nothing really can, but maybe something to think about...when I held my dear late lover cat Bounder, who had been declining for a long time from renal failure, as the vet gave him the shot, I will always *swear* that I suddenly got a lightning-fast mental message, as clearly as if I heard it, fervently saying "Thank You" as he went to sleep. In English. I wasn't expecting anything like that at all...but I *know* he sent it to me in a way I could understand. I got an image/message that he was *so* relieved to be done with the discomfort and pain and he knew I was doing him a last service that was very difficult for me to allow and he wanted me to know that it was the right thing to do. It was so bizarre--so clear--I'll never forget it.

I agree with natal; I think of it as an *honor* that we are able to give this last gift to such noble beings who have loved us, given us the best of their hearts and souls, for so long.
Oakley
13 years ago
A long tight hug for you. I know there are no words to console you right now. Just know he lived a good long life as it should have been. :)

It does anger me though that vets charge an enormous amount to come to the house to put a pet down, or refuse to come at all even if they have the time to do so.
User
13 years ago
I'm so sorry. That's a really hard thing to do but I agree a very humane thing when the time comes. Saying a prayer for you and your family.
bestyears
13 years ago
I am more sorry for you than I can possibly express.....

IF IT SHOULD BE

If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.

--- Anonymous ---
hhireno
13 years ago
Oh, I'm so sorry. It's never easy to face that decision. There will be a little Dubs shaped hole in your heart for awhile but it will heal. Or should that be heel since we're talking about a dog?
folkvictorian
13 years ago
Oh, Golddust, I'm so sorry to read this. My heart goes out to you and your family.

When you feel like it, would you tell us more about sweet Dubs? I would love to hear stories of his intuition and how he helped save a life. He sounds like an incredible dog.
deeinohio
13 years ago
I am sharing your tears right now, for your lovely Dubs and every lovely "Dubs" I've had in my life and still miss. Please share a picture when you're able, and I, too, would love to hear the story of his life.
Dee
lynninnewmexico
13 years ago
(((Golddust))), I'm so sorry for your pain. Please know that I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you go through this tough time. So many of us here are parents and best friends to our furkids and are mourning along with you and with Whitdobe today.
Lynn
cathrugg
13 years ago
My heart breaks for you and your family. Take comfort in you provided the most loving home for sweet Dubs.

You were the first to reply on my friend's adoption of a rescue when I asked for advice and I will never forget the heartfelt help and knowledge you passed on. And for that I am forever thankful. (That dog became mine!!)

My aunt passed on these words of wisdom and I couldn't agree more:

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." ~ Anatole France

You are in our prayers tonight.
Cathrugg
paintergirl94
13 years ago
I am so sorry you have to go through this. My first dalmation had to be put down. In my head, it was the right thing, in my heart it was unbearable. 7 years later, I still say goodnight to his picture. My second dalmation was old, and when we knew the time was near, we called the vet to make the appointment. He died in my arms that morning, sitting by the fire.
It is so difficult to wrap your head around the whole thing, but just know that you gave him an incredible life, and his spirit will be with you forever. You are a better person for having known him. My deepest sympathy for you and I will say a prayer for Dubs tonight.
neetsiepie
13 years ago
(((Debby))) My love to you and Dubs and your whole family.

We had to put our beloved Rotty, Teeja down after the cancer she'd developed was too far gone. It was so difficult, but I was able to hold her as she passed on. She would only allow me to touch her, and she looked at me with her deep, soulfull eyes that were red rimmed with pain and those eyes told me she was grateful for all we'd shared. When she passed over so quickly and quietly, I knew she was pain free and she'd live with us forever.
les917
13 years ago
Golddust, I add my thoughts of sorrow and loss and deepest condolences to you. I hope that your memories will ease the loss and one day replace your tears with smiles as you remember the life you shared.

As others have said so well, know that what you are doing is truly an act of love. Your Dubs trusts you to do what is best and right, and what you are doing is living up to that trust.

((((Hugs)))))
graywings123
13 years ago
From all you have written about Dubs, we know he had a good life with you. You have my sympathies - this is one of the hardest things to face.
judiegal6
13 years ago
So sorry to hear your sad news, you are in my prayers.
whitdobe
13 years ago
Oh Golddust, I'm so very sorry. I know it's a really hard decision to make, can really tear your heart up, but when it's gotten to a certain point it really is the last act of love you can perform for your dog. I know you'll be broken up over Dubs for quite a while, I'm still having crying jags over Mason, but eventually we should both be able to look back over our wonderful memories and smile. I know it'll be really bad for a while..........I'm so sorry.
cyn427 (z. 7, N. VA)
13 years ago
Golddust, I am so sorry. Every time one of us posts about losing a pet, I end up in tears. No matter how often we go through this in our lives, it breaks our hearts all over again.

(((Golddust and Dubs)))
User
13 years ago
(((((Golddust))))) My thoughts are with you, and my heart goes out to you. It hurts so much, I know.
kellyeng
13 years ago
Oh no, not another sweet dog . . . I'm sorry for your loss, it's so so hard.
texanjana
13 years ago
I am so sorry.
Meghane
13 years ago
I am so sorry. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Faron79
13 years ago
"The needs of the 'One' (Dubs) outweigh the needs of the many..."

This line from Star-Trek II means a lot to me on a deeper level.

At Dubs' time of greatest need, you granted Him his peace.
Bless you both, and your family during this very tough time.

(typin' thru tears here....)
Faron
moonshadow
13 years ago
I'm so sorry.
mitchdesj
13 years ago
I hope it went well, you have my sympathies.
User
13 years ago
I'm so sorry, so sad, I hope it went as well as could be expected. That is such a gut wrenching and hard thing to do but so unselfish. My heart goes out to you and your family.

I'm so sad...

Comments (31)

jakabedy

natal

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