Are the rates as high for officers? I ask because sometimes a troubled youth is often told that joining the military will staighten him/her out and the problems that plagued the young adult are not truly addressed. Just a quick theory, I have to read your posts later, for I am short on time now.

I would be so proud of my child for wanting to join but in my heart I would be terrified and yes, probably sad. I would not ever try and talk her out of a decision she made after weighing all her options. I know many military people who have never regretted their choices, but all but one, are officers and not enlisted so I am not sure if that changes their level of happiness. Just like in any career, I think those in higher ranks have greater satisfaction levels.

We most certainly do need better mental health options available for our military personnel.

This post was edited by roarah on Sun, Jan 27, 13 at 11:45

I don't think this is new. Vietnam Vets had a lot of trouble coming home. Do they consider enlisting versus being drafted? Being drafted into war brings a whole other dimension to things.

What golddust said.

I debated about answering because I felt my opinion would not be popular. My son wanted to join the military; that decision was a huge fear of mine back then & I'm thankful he did not. Had my dad not retired & built a house near us; then was diagnosed with terminal cancer; he would probably have joined.

He graduated in 2003; we had service people calling the house on a regular basis from 2 years before until 3-4 years after. Not sure what finally stopped the calls but once they get your number; it leaves a bad taste in your mouth with how much they call.

He is my only son; the fear of him going over was high. His dream was to be on the front lines. His high school friends were sent over. I knew others in the military; we lived in a military town & saw what it does to the children / families. I also know people that have been injured & left to fend for themselves. That's the worst part of it; they fight for our country & if injured are pushed aside.

While I would have been very proud of my son for joining; I'm thankful he did not.

No. I don't want my children, or anyone's children, to join the military. To the extent that it is a necessary evil, it should be a responsibility borne equally across the population. As long as the ravages of war continue to be borne disproportionately, we will probably continue to be too quick to war.

My boyfriend was killed in Viet Nam in 1967. My brother served in Viet Nam and was never the same.

My oldest son was recruited in to the USMC when he was 20. He just turned 38 Thursday.

We supported his decision to enlist. He was glad he did for many reasons and his career as a chef was learned and then supported by his military service. If you asked him if he would want his son to enlist in the military I can assure you he would say no. DS1 has a sticker on his car...Veteran against the War.

As gold pointed out WW ll was different. Not a good war certainly and the suffering and death following has its own story to tell. But the way the country welcomed back the Vets and the way they still to this day get together and are treated in this country is very very different from the way veterans have been treated since Viet Nam.

The current situation is so unique to the world is so many ways. There is much more controversy about our involvement in these military actions...note I will not use the term war here. We don't have the general populace behind these actions as we had in WWll. There have always been people against wars but the actions we now participate in world wide are not wars in the same way.

What we now have are financial investments. Our country has been a military machine to promote economics since Eisenhower. We have an economy that benefits by our investing in military equipment and the enterprises surrounding the encounters we indulge in. We would not be able to supply jobs in this country if we abandoned all military pursuits in foreign lands and brought the soldiers home . If we only kept a small active duty force and stopped manufacturing all the advanced equipment we would be in huge trouble economically . If the majority of military personnel were to flood the job market our unemployment rate would be astronomical. It is NOT going to happen.

Is this the right way to fund a country ? I don't think so . I think it is morally bankrupt to kill military personnel so that our country has financial health. I think it is morally bankrupt to sell weapons to both sides of a dispute in a foreign country. Does our country have any intention of stopping either of these pursuits..I don't think so.

The newest research shows that PTSD is caused in large part by the feelings a military person has when he or she witnesses a tragedy that they have no control over or performs an action that they can not deal with mentally. Killing someone, watching someone be killed and unable to save them..innocent bystanders or a comrade in arms. Makes no difference.

The military says that they are trying to increase the funding and support for the veterans. I can tell you that that is NOT the case. One of my best friends has been a psychologist for the military for most of her career. In the past 3 months she has been informed that she can only serve in a base that is within 50 miles of her home . The entire system that has supported sending counselors where they are needed has been suspended. They were told there is no money for overnight stays or for meals etc. She can drive over and see patients and drive home. That is it. Nice...she feels like she has abandoned the soldiers that she was helping. She is very upset and depressed that the people she was seeing are now only going to be seen by someone within 50 miles of their base. Maybe there will be someone and maybe there won't. Maybe the person available will be qualified and maybe they won't.

Hm...well my hands are shaking and my heart is beating so hard that my chest is thumping. I guess this is a subject that hits close to home for me. I have had 2 of my brothers commit suicide. One was a Viet Nam vet.

I have no patience for a government that places part of our population in jobs that are as perilous as our current military situation . c

God Bless our Military Men and Women. That being said, I would NOT want my children (ages 22, 20 and 15) in the military for my own selfish reasons.

Ditto Covingtoncat. I don't think there are many who actually WANT their children to serve in the military, and especially would not want them on the frontline. That said, I am very proud of those who do serve our country. I think our country owes our military personnel, veterans, especially, so much more than they receive.

I don't have children but have relatives and other young people (godsons) in our lives. If they came to me and asked me - I don't think I would advise them to enlist, or not to enlist. I would, however, advise them to think long and hard about their decision.

tina

Thank you for all these thoughtful replies. I agree that the current volunteer system has created a terrible divide in our society, and that is one of the reasons I wish some kind of national service was mandatory for all young people out of high school, military or not. Spreading the risk would probably mean more public involvement in our foreign policy and it would certainly mean the troops get the vital equipment they need. A US senator may not vote to appropriate money for top notch body armor until his or her son or daughter needs it. It would mean a shared experience at a still=impressionable age that could only help the next generation get along better than ours has.

I would probably lie down in front of a tank to keep my kids out of one (for pragmatic reasons cited above as well as an abhorence of war in general) and wondered how others felt about this issue-- which is completely separate, as far as I am concerned, from divisive politics.

C, I could feel the pain in your words and I am so sorry

I believe our military has a place at home. Rebuilding infrastructure, serving in disasters and helping deal with our own troubled aspects of society. Building green energy. I would love to spend my tax money on things like this...

I like the idea that everyone must serve as I would like to believe the people who send our children to war would think much harder if their children had to go as well. Unfortunately, most wealthy and connected people manage to keep their own children in safe places while serving in the military so that ideal is just a pipe dream.

I appreciate the military men and women. If we didn't learn anything from Vietnam Nam than we should all be damned. But WWII vets got schooling benefits, housing loans, etc. Our country was grateful. Now I am not sure if anyone can articulate why we are sending our children off to slaughter and be slaughtered. Is it oil? Is it because we are trying to force others to adopt a Democracy that will never be possible?

We are doing a terrible job thanking our vets these days.

I do not want either of my two children to join the military. They are not particularly suited for military life and even if they were, I don't want them in harm's way. But if they chose a military career I would be supportive of their choice and proud of their service to their country.

I know several young people in the military and I am very proud of them and their service. A dear friend is in the Naval Academy and I am so proud of her. She is an outstanding young woman.

Or if you are not a parent, would you advise a young person to join who asked your opinion ?

I am a parent, but I will answer this one anyway. It depends on the person. I do know a few young people who I think would be a very good fit for the military, and if they asked, I would advise them to join. If I thought my son and daughter were a particularly good fit, I would set aside my own desires for their safety and advise them to join. Thankfully, they are better suited for other careers. If my students tell me their goal is to join the military, then I am supportive of their choice and do my best to prepare them for the ASVAB.

I would love to see our government provide better services and assistance to our military. Like tinam61, I believe our government owes our veterans more than they receive.

Although I think our veterans are owed more than they receive, I do think our local community treats our returning servicemen better than the returning Vietnam vets were often treated. But that is just my impression, I could be wrong. I read newspaper accounts and hear through the community grapevine about the efforts our community makes to welcome our returning wounded servicemen and help adapt their homes or help pay some of their bills. I never hear anyone denigrate them or call them names, but instead hear concern and thanks for their service. The people I know who are very vocal in their opposition to the war are nevertheless supportive and encouraging to our returning veterans.

This post was edited by daisyinga on Sun, Jan 27, 13 at 23:30

No, I would not.

I offered to take my mom out to lunch this Saturday, when she usually goes to her weekly war protest. I thought it would be too cold for her for the rally (it was 25 degrees out and she is 80), but she wanted to go, so we went together.

While there, a man came up to us. Looked like life has been hard on him. He said both of his sons are in the military and fighting for nothing. He is very upset that they are there, and said he supported us.

Interestingly, the people who always go to the rally are people over 60. The main coordinators are in their 70s, and they are there rain or shine, freezing temps or not. One of the women has Parkison's, and goes in her wheelchair. They are so dedicated. They go to high schools to protest recruiting. They protested a high school that has a military school within it. They are trying to spread the word that the promises of what they will get (like a college education) are often empty.

I see that a sign that advertises a weekly support group for veterans suffering from PTSD. I am sad every time I see it. Seems like people are really cheated.

There is an organization of vets against war. To me, this is most telling.

When my eldest child (girl) was 17, we had a long talk about her possibly joining the military after high school. This was in 2000. At the time, I told her I'd be very proud to have my daughter serve, and that when I was 17 I wanted to join the Navy, but at the time, women could not serve on ships, so I didn't enlist.

Then 9/11 happened. She didn't enlist after all, but did have a lot of friends who had after 9/11, and one close friend was shot and permanently disabled. Soon our whole idea of military service changed-and I was terrified that my boys would be drafted, and when I looked at the faces of their friends, I cried.

I really felt torn, I'd support my child going into the service during peace time, but during a war? How could ANY mother support that? But having your child go into the military could mean combat. I guess that since after Viet Nam, we'd had so many years of peacetime that I forgot about the horrors of war.

But there is no way I'd want my child to enlist today. I'm terribly worried about my nephew-he was determined to join the Army, but due to a freak accident, wasn't able to go to basic and the specialized training he was set to go to. Now he's enlisted with the Guard. I am worried about him-he wants to be a hero-and the promises of college have glossed over his eyes. He's 21 now, able to make his own choices, but boy, if he was my son, I'd done everything I could have to talk him out of it. I'd be very, very proud of my child if the did chose to serve, but I'd have to be on tranquilizers. Shoot, having my boy in prison for a year nearly caused me to have a nervous breakdown-I couldn't imagine him being in combat. Those young people are so incredibly brave, and I salute them and their parents.

I have been debating amswering this qustion ever since it was first posted. My DD 17 is a high school senior and is waiting to hear if she has been accepted to any of the three US service academies she spent hours and hours and hours applying to last fall.

When she told us she was interested in serving I cried for a long time, fearing for her safety. Then I laid down a few rules: you must be an officer, not enlisted; no army and no marines. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep at night with any of those scenarios. She has my support during this process, but I must admit I still am not completely sold on the deal.

I think we all agree that we hate war. I do think war is necessary sometimes. Our servicemen take an oath to protect and defend the Constitution. I think action in Afghanistan was warranted. I do not think sending troops to Bosnia was. I can not accept my daughter being a peace keeper in a place she has no business being.

We are quickly moving to an era where war - at least on our side - will not be fought by men but machines. The lessened danger for our troops is good, of course, but bad in that the lessened stakes make it easier to go to war.

A huge concern for me is that I do not have confidence in our Commader-in-Chief, and don't believe he has the best interests of the country or the military at heart. For instance, allowing women in combat is a horrible decision, and will have huge ramifications. I don't understand how decisions like that can be made hidden from public discourse, and then casually announced at the end of a business day. So much for the most transparent administration ever.

(I do not wish to start a political debate. I know many of you trust and have confidence in this president, while I don't. In order to share with you my true concerns about my daughter's decisions, it is impossible to keep politics out of it. I will not respond to political comments, as they are unproductive in a forum such as this.)

DD's dream is to join the Coast Guard, as she supports their humanitarian mission. However, she ultimately just wants to serve and would be thrilled to serve in the Navy or Air Force as well. We should know in the next month what her plans will be.

Nicole

Nicole, you are free to say anything you wish, but it is disingenuous at best to say it is "impossible to keep politics out of this" and then declare that you will "not respond to political comments" right after you have made one yourself.

Why not try facts as an antidote to emotion? Every news report I read about this decision--- not opinion pieces, but news---- stated the initiative came from the military, not the White House. Here are some excerpts from an article that is linked below (bolding added):

Defense officials said Mr. Panetta had made the decision on the recommendation of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

But while it had to have been approved by him, and does not require action by Congress, it appeared Wednesday that it was in large part driven by the military itself. Some midlevel White House staff members were caught by surprise by the decision, indicating that it had not gone through an extensive review there.

Mr. Panetta's decision came after he received a Jan. 9 letter from Gen. Martin E. Dempsey, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, who stated in strong terms that the armed service chiefs all agreed that "the time has come to rescind the direct combat exclusion rule for women and to eliminate all unnecessary gender-based barriers to service."

Sorry for that digression.

Anele, interesting story about your mom and her age cohort.

Universal compulsory national service would also remove some barriers to young folk who might really like the service and make a good career and life of it but don't get the opportunity because of opposition from their families. Or if not outright opposition, a general attitude that would prevent them from ever considering the military in the first place.

Nicole, I am sorry I forgot the link, it is below.

Here is a link that might be useful: Women in Combat Was Military Decision

"Nicole, you are free to say anything you wish, but it is disingenuous at best to say it is "impossible to keep politics out of this" and then declare that you will "not respond to political comments" right after you have made one yourself."

Let me try to clarify. My reservations are certainly political in nature. I shared them in the context of my feelings regarding my daughters aspirations. *You* wanted to know where I was coming from. There is nothing disingenuous about saying that I realize some of you disagree, but you wanted to know why I feel the way I do. My views are not the focus of this topic and I will not debate them.

I hesitated to share at all because...

1. This is a subject that is hitting very close to home, and I am a little superstitious about discussing it. Irrational, I know...

2. I did NOT want to start a political discussion. Four years ago I engaged in a on-line political debate, here on Hot Topics. It was with a formerly frequent poster from the Decor forum who was banned afterwards. It was so freakin' time consuming and infuriating and a colossal waste of energy.

Did anyone learn anything? Was anyone's mind changed? No, I just saw a usually friendly and supportive poster turn very ugly and ultimately got herself shut out.

I have never had an on-line political debate since and I certainly I won't get into it here. This has already been too much. I regret sharing something I am already very sensitive about.

Nicole

For instance, allowing women in combat is a horrible decision, and will have huge ramifications.

I'm curious what folks think about this. I have heard people say that they think it's a horrible idea, but I've heard even more people say that it's about time. That this will mean equal pay for women who are already in harm's way.

My question had to do with concerns about the aftermath of service (unemployment) and the mental health hazards of being a member of the military. Concern over those particular issues has nothing to do with one's politics. Yes, you did introduce your political viewpoint and you have every right to do it. I appreciate that you did not want anyone to question your statements. However, since your opinion is based on erroneous impressions (about who authored the inclusion of women in combat) I could not let your statement pass uncorrected. It was not an attempt to "correct" your political opinions and I apologize if it appeared that way.

SunnyCottage, I've heard both sides of opinion about women in combat as well. I think it was inevitable.... Wouldnt ever want my daughter in such a situation but otoh she would be better in an emergency or combat than either of her brothers. Not sure there is anything inherently "wrong" about the idea.

I think about this all the time. My husband is a Naval Academy graduate and served 9 years as an officer in the Navy. However, he grew up the son of an international airline pilot who was not home much, and he eventually he decided he didn't want to be in a profession that took him away from his kids for lengthy periods of time (ironically, when our older two kids were infants and toddlers, he ended up traveling internationally for his job and would be gone for weeks at a time - but no longer). So while my kids are not growing up in a military household, they are very familiar with the Naval Academy. We live only a few miles from there, they go to school just blocks away from it, and we sponsor a midshipman. The Academy is a big part of our town's identity as a tourist destination. We attend all kinds of Navy games, they attend sports clinics that the Naval Academy offers, the midshipmen often participate in mentoring opportunities at their school and in our community. The sister of my son's best friend is currently a midshipman at the Academy. My husband makes comments to the boys like, "If you want to go to the Naval Academy, you have to do well in school." My oldest dd has already expressed that she has no interest in the Academy, and my youngest dd isn't even thinking about college yet.

With all that said, I have no idea what I would do if one of my kids wanted to join the military, though I know there is a very distinct possibility that one of my sons might be interested. I am somewhat of a pacifist though I understand the need for a military but I just do not support war. Even though my husband was in the military when I met him, he just does not seem the type to be in the military and I've always wondered what even drew him to the Naval Academy in the first place - he's doesn't even entirely recall! I have to say though that IF one of my kids were interested in the military, the one place I'd feel most comfortable having them serve is in the Navy. At least they are not typically involved in the front lines of fighting. I would definitely be a nutcase if one of my kids was in the Army, Marines or a Navy seal or pilot (though I don't see either of my boys at this point, having that ambition, but who knows).

I do have to say that the education that my husband received was rigorous and would be proud of any of my kids if they made it through the Academy. There is also the strong alumni that really help in terms of networking once you leave the military. Dh's career success in a large part goes back to the strong leadership skills he learned in school and in the Navy. He also, through his military job, made some very good connections that enabled him to get a very good job. He also serves on a board that Naval Academy where he continues to reap the benefits of good networking. So in that sense, an education at the Naval Academy is something that can be very valuable. Unfortunately, it comes with a heavy commitment to serve. And I'm not sure, as a mother, how I will feel if that day ever comes.

KSWL, I realize I didn't address your questions about mental health issues and unemployment. This is a very troubling subject that I don't think our country is adequately addressing. I don't have any personal experience with it, but I do know that it's not limited to the enlisted, though I realize they are disproportionately the ones most affected. A friend of mine's husband, who was in the Reserves, was called up to active duty and had several back to back tours over in Afghanistan. He only recently returned, and while he wasn't injured by military power, he did have all kinds of physical AND mental issues when he returned. When he returned, his family was rejoicing only to learn that he was not going to be allowed to return to his family b/c of mental and physical issues. He was at Walter Reed (family in OK) for a month getting treatment before he was finally allowed home. However, he was a changed man and it has been very difficult on his wife and their five young children who don't recognize the husband and father who came back to them. And to think that he's one of the fortunate ones who not only had help waiting for him upon his return, but he also has a job to go back to. So many do not have that opportunity.

Dh was a Marine. Two of my mom's ex-husbands were Marines. My FIL is retired Air Force. The military has been a huge part of my life and I do understand the positives of that lifestyle and of course, the negatives as well. I of course do not want my children to serve in combat. My 15yo boy really, really wants to serve and of course that is his decision to make. I try to choose my words carefully with him about the issue because I recognize there is little I can say at this time to change his mind but we are working diligently to educate him. We have conversations about the point of the technology, that while it is cool, the point of it is to kill people. We have talks about the "enemy," how often times you are not fighting the real bad guy, you are fighting people who often have no choice. We have him read books that are anti-war too (All Quiet on the Western Front, War is a Racket, etc). He is not allowed to play video games where actual people are shot at, etc. We have set his schooling up in such a way that he will not graduate until he is 19. We are also trying to impress upon him going to college before joining. We have also tried talking to him about the possibility of serving as a medic, where his purpose is to save lives. I have no idea how this will play out over time but we are trying to recognize and respect who our son is and prepare him for the future he chooses. Now, my daughter is likely disqualified as she is diabetic, so the military is not on the horizon for her and my other 2 boys do not seem inclined that way (so I will just have different worries for the 3 of them!).

As a wife of a military member (Air Force Guard enlisted) who has served 15 years, is a veteran of the Iraq war, and is currently still serving in the military, some of these responses are so different from my own experiences with the military. I'm not a parent, but I would support someone's personal decision to serve in the military, including my own childs.

The military is a very large organization, just because you're in the military does not mean you will see or experience combat up close and first hand, even in times of war. In fact there are probably more jobs that support missions than people who are actually out there involved in doing the missions. My husband was deployed over there during the war and never left the base he was stationed at, never once saw combat, as did other military members stationed over there at the base he was stationed at.

The military is also so much more than just fighting in wars. They do a fair amount of humanitarian missions, and are mostly national security. I do think being in the military in some ways can be what you make it, you do have some options as to career, officer/enlisted, guard/active, and branch of military. If you know how to use your time in the military, the benefits and training they offer can be an advantage for someone's future career, when they decide to get out, however unfortunately some go in without future plans in mind and then get out with no direction. My husband switched his career field in the guard from satellite communications to computers and is now working full time as a IT contractor at US Strategic Command, along with his part time one weekend a month job in the guard. He wouldn't have his current full time job had it not been for his connections, volunteer deployments, and training/schooling through the guard.

As far as benefits, in my personal experience with the military, my husband received 40,000.00 for college (GI Bill), which he has used with no issues for his bachelors degree and there are additional military grants for guard members that if they attended a state school in the state they are serving, their tuition would be waved. He also has received two associate degrees which he earned in the guard through their training and schooling at no cost. We used his VA loan for the house that we currently live in, which can have some perks over traditional loans and was nice to have in a time when banks got strict about home loans. If he stays in 20 years, he will receive retirement benefits. There are benefits on base that are nice, free gym, tax free shopping, inexpensive hotel lodging, HOPS (flights), etc. During the times he has been federally activated (which for the most part have been volunteer deployments, his choice to be a part of, not mandatory) we received full benefits, they paid 100% of our housing, and medical bills along with his active full time employment pay. While he was deployed the FRG was in contact with me often along with someone from his unit to make sure I was taken care of while he was gone. And by law his current full time employer kept his job and it was waiting for him when he returned without any issues. His mandatory deployments lasted no longer than 3-6 months, usually less than that though, and a couple of his state side volunteer deployments/missions and training/schooling I got to travel with him so we weren't apart.

The reception my husband has received from others being a military member and a vet, has been nothing but kind and supportive, from gracious hand shakes and thanks yous, to people buying him free drinks, paying for meals at restaurants unexpectedly etc., also lots of military discounts from various places of business, recently we got 500.00 off our car purchase at a dealership. However I realize this is not always the case for every military member.

My husband told me last night that the military is trying to provide more mental health programs and are very aware of the PTSD and suicide issues. He said that his base and unit have received a lot more training on mental health in the last few years and more programs are being made available for military members and their families. Some of it has to do with budgeting, and the cuts in military spending though, decisions made not by the military but by our government. Also being someone who has been diagnosed with PTSD from a trauma that happened to me in college, I know it's not always easy to ask for help or seek help even when it's made available, there can be feelings of guilt, shame, and embarrassment involved among other difficulties and emotional struggles.

I'm not sure about the idea that the military shouldn't be all volunteer but equal responsibility, there are some people I wouldn't want to have to depend on fighting in a war, and having people serving in a war that had no choice at all to be there (didn't volunteer) could be dangerous in certain situations and cause loss of life.

For some they are proud to serve, they want to serve, they feel honored to be a part of the military. They know and accept that there are risks that can come with the job. As can be similar risks for any other service job like police, fireman, EMT, etc. Some of the service men and women I know wouldn't be happy at a desk job working 9-5, they like the excitement, the travel, feeling like you're part of something bigger than yourself, and the comradery of their fellow service men and women. They do not all come from poor families, many could have just gone straight to college, like my husband, but wanted to serve their country instead.

My experiences with the military have been more good than bad, I know it's different for everyone though, and I'm sure DH being in the AF guard instead of active and not gone as much on mandatory deployments and having a fairly "safe" job that he choose is part of that. I'm sure if he was on the frontlines fighting, I would probably have a very different outlook on the military.

My husband is an Army veteran. He's a firefighter now. He enlisted right after 9/11 and was very, very lucky in that his commitment was up not a week before his unit shipped out to Iraq.

We have two young sons who love to play soldiers "like Daddy." They don't have any real interest in firefighters. I'm sure my husband would not want our boys to enlist but it is, ultimately, up to them. It hurts my heart to think about it.

I'm so glad Roobear spoke up with some factual information about the military in terms of benefits, etc. My father was career military, so I'm literally the colonel's daughter. My brother and SIL met at a military college and were both ROTC then active duty for the required time commitment, after which they left the military and went into civilian careers.

My own view is that a military force serves a necessary function in any society. While it is tempting to imagine that life would be wonderful without having or needing armies (or navies or marines or air forces) the truth is that throughout history there have been societal conflicts that could not be resolved except through military operations. Soldiers go in harm's way so all the rest of us do not have to. Simple as that. Are there conflicts that aren't worthy of military involvement? Of course but then again sometimes history has to be the most accurate judge even of that.

And having grown up experiencing it, my belief is that a huge part of the military is its commitment to training and developing young people. My father had commands throughout the years I was growing up and the way he felt about 'my boys' (this was before women were there in numbers) was what every good coach, leader, mentor or teacher feels about those in his care. I remember plenty of young guys who ate at our table when they had nowhere to go for a holiday, who slept on the couch between legs of a deployment when they had nowhere to stay and whose welfare my dad was constantly watching out for. I know he has spoken about the awesome duty of being responsible for those young lives as a field commander in Vietnam. He won medals for rescuing some of those young lives as a helicopter rescue pilot.

In my own life as a college career advisor I have seen repeatedly how valuable military service is for the veterans I counsel. Those are the individuals I can rely on to be on time, responsible, reliable and trustworthy. The military instills extremely strong values and habits, ones that can help young people find their way in the world long after they enter civilian life.

It may be all too easy to criticize the military without really understanding the complexity of what it does, what it represents and who it serves. I certainly would never maintain that the military is a perfect career choice. But if one of my children decided to pursue it, I would be very proud of him/her. Would I worry? Of course. But my son is pursuing law enforcement as a career and I worry about him too. The military isn't the only dangerous job around.

Roo and Running, very well written and thoughtful posts. Mine won't be because I'm unable to express myself as well as you , I'm posting from my ipad, and I'm short on time:)

DH is retired military; it was a wonderful experience for him professionally and for us as a family. He works p/t for the military now, works closely with active duty members and always speaks so highly of them. We always thought our son would join which would have been fine with us. The military works hard at developing their troops in every way. So many lost souls come in but leave with a newfound confidence and purpose in life. DS ultimately decided against joining and that was fine, too. We just want him to be happy.

This post was edited by funnygirl on Mon, Jan 28, 13 at 17:50