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If you only had a year to live and you knew it

15 years ago

what would you do?

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Comments (23)

sushipup1
15 years ago
Clean out the damned closets before my husband finds out what a load of carp I've stashed away. Then I could die in peace.
Gina_W
15 years ago
Helene! LOL!!

I have friends, acquaintances, and friends of friends who are going through various cancers right now. Two male friends going through prostate cancer, who don't know each other, have purchased top-of-the-line Mercedes. It's like they woke up and said to themselves - dammit! I don't know how much longer I have, so I'm gonna go get my dream car!

The closer friend has admitted that was the reason. I just had breakfast with him today. He has been the most admirable example through this hard time. He never complains and is always smiling. He is generous and kind to all of us. I only wish if I have to walk in those shoes some day that I can be like him. His wife is the same. These past 3 years or so she has never complained, and she is like a rock for her husband.

I try to live my life as if there is no tomorrow. I had a near-death experience in my early 20s and that changed me forever.

So the answer to your question is that I would do what I'm doing right now.
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I am a new member to gw and hope I am not intruding here but Wow! We are attempting this exact same thing right now. We moved to 82 acres of sand and sage brush just over a year ago and are starting with absolutly nothing but what we brought with us and can provide or build on our own. We are 38 miles from the edge of town and we are 100 percent off grid. We have no address, so no fire , police, or medical services of any kind out here. When we moved here our plans were to gradually build up to a self sustaining life style over a period of a few years. We had a savings and job options all lined up. Instaed, the economy tanked and I lost any hope of working due to my health. We were kind of forced to decide on the spot if we realy wanted to do this or if we were going to go back to the city. We decide this realy is what we want to do and have been sticking to it. We haul water, we are building solar panels, have a very small geni for night time power and heat with scavaenged wood and use straw for insulation for both us and the animals. It took a full year for my partner to find any kind of work at all we lived off of saving and my tiny disability income until then and now most of his pay goes for fuel to get to work(79 miles round trip every day) . I was not able to get a pair of goats until Aug 25th of last year. We still need two more does so that we can keep a clean heard of 3-5 goats going at all times for both meat and milk. We have chickens ( the first thing we put out here, Reds, Amercanas,Siklies, and Bantoms) as well as Ducks and Pheasant. We plan on Turkeys and Geese this year. We also plan on rabbits in the future ( the new zelands )but have a large wild population to hunt for now. We will be saving for American Guinea Hogs and Irish Dexter Cattle. If we must, we will do a Dexter / Jersy cross for the cattle. We only want the smaller heiratige breads of the larger livestock since they are much nicer to the land ( I can comfortably range 3-5 dexters on the same amount of land as 1 of the standard breads of cattle and that 3-5 animals is all we will need ) and they can comfortably handle our major temp swings with out health issues. I only managed a small experimental bed last year. It was to see if I could grow all of the things that the folks here has major dificulty with since they are some of the mainstays in most home gardens (tomatoes , peppers, beans, greens, and mushrooms ). With a lot of creative gardening , it worked. So this year will be my first real garden attempt. A large percentage of what others have posted is on our list of things to plant or grow. This is not an all inclusive list but we have also added things Quinoa , flax , sorgums, sunchokes, sunflowwers, barley, oats, rye, buck wheat, soybeans, alfalfa, millet, wheat and clover ( because all of these they are good for both human and animal consumption). Most of these things can be grow together because they devolpe and mature at different times, many are symbiotic relationship plants ( think 3 sisters planting,like corn, beans and squash in the same bed), and they also build and maintaining the soil. We have not yet aquired most of these but hope to soon. They provide food crops and fodder crops at different stages so the production is double duty. With carefull and selective harvesting and seed saving we can set aside next years crop of some of the anuals like the buck wheat. We have plans on a small orchard and I received a gift of a few nut trees for birthday ( 2 hazel nuts a pecan and an almond) and they should arive in june. We will also try to take advantage of the native plants to incourage the continued diversity of wild life we have out here. If the Fox, Cyotes ,hawks,eagles, mountain lions , badgers and other bigger preditor types have an ample food sources, our animals are less attractive to them. We also get better polination , and bug controls. I am an experianced gardener but not in this zone 5 and with these kind of temp swings ( We are alpine high desert with -5 to -15 in the winter , 100 plus regularly in the summer and a last frost date of june 10 ). I can tell you it will be a challenge to everything you think you know. So, Thank you, Your efforts do not just benefit those you seek to help but also some of us at home. I wish you the best of luck with your experiment and will follow your post for any lessons you may be able pass on.
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wizardnm
15 years ago
I get up every morning and say a big Thank You for my life as it is....but I'd also make vacation plans for Hawaii as fast as I could!

Nancy
sands99
Original Author
15 years ago
I'm with you Nancy - I'd go out with a great tan ;-)
amck2
15 years ago
It's not so much what I'd do, but what I'd stop doing.

I would stop saying "Yes" to invitations and things I do out of a sense of obligation. I'd try to spend more time with the people I love, doing simple things I enjoy doing. And I would eat dessert any night of the week I wanted it, not only one portion on the weekend!
sheshebop
15 years ago
Quit working and spend lots of time with kids and grandkids.
chase_gw
15 years ago
Well first of all I'd fight like hell for a while and not give in....then I would spend a whole bunch of time documenting my life and my families life, labeling pictures and explaining the importance of certain things, making sure my kids knew the details about their grandparents.

I don;t think I would take any great trips, it would only make me sad to know I could never do it again.
annie1992
15 years ago
Like Chase, I'd fight it like hell. Unlike Chase I'd never give in and when my time came I'd still be arguing at the Pearly Gates that I wasn't going.

Other than that, it's too depressing to think about, so I'm not going to. I'm going to spend my days just like I always do, cooking with the grandkids, riding my horse, watching my red cows happily chewing, talking to my chickens, all with Elery right next to me, from the time the sun comes up until the time it goes down and be grateful for every darned minute of it. Even the sad parts.

Annie
rob333 (zone 7b)
15 years ago
Like Gina I faced death at a young age and I changed right then and there. I don't think I'd do much differently. Guaranteed a year and no one would face the repurcussions, e.g. my son or mother having to pay my debt? I'd try to get some place tropical with my mom and son, and keep us there for the year, somehow.
chase_gw
15 years ago
Annie one of my biggest regrets, and I know hers too, was Cathy ( my sister for those who are newer) never stopped fighting, never admitted it was, what it was. As a result she never had the talks with Doug and I and Sara that she needed to have, what her wishes were for Sara, what was important for us to do. Her lasts word to me were "we need to talk" I will never let those be the last words to those I love......

A bit morose but my point is there comes a time to accept what is happening, deal with it and share with those who love you.
shaun
15 years ago
I would clean our my underware drawer, folding everything just so.
I would go shopping and max out all my credit cards... Give hubs something to remember me by.
I would eat anything I wanted.
I'd smoke cigarettes.
I'd drink cocktails in the afternoon.
I would ride a roller coaster.

I'd just do everything I'm scared to do right now for fear of getting hurt or dying.
Gina_W
15 years ago
I didn't know folding underwear was so dangerous, LOL!
dgkritch
15 years ago
Pretty much what Annie and Chase said.
Get everything "in order", keep fighting and praying.
Spend lots of quality time with family and friends.
Cry alot. Let's be honest here!!

Deanna
dedtired
15 years ago
Quit my job and walk out the door. Spend quality time with my kids. I wouldn't tell them what was going on so they would act "normal".

Get all my affairs in order and clean out the house (that might tip them off) to save them the headache of dealing with an estate.

Eat anything and everything I want. Travel.

In a way it would be a release from worrying about so many things -- although I'd rather live.
Bumblebeez SC Zone 7
15 years ago
Everything Shaun said except for the cigs and roller coaster.
dedtired
15 years ago
By the way, Sands, I hope this is a hypothetical question!
mitchdesj
15 years ago
I'd get a Louis Vuitton bag and my hair done every 2 days; I'd have DD videotape me an hour a day so I could give instructions as I go along, share all my wisdom,
say all I have to say.

seriously, I think I would pretty much ignore it for the first 6 months and then start a countdown, yikes it must be awful.

I guess we should all try to live our lives fully, as if the one year thing was really happening.
riverrat1
15 years ago
I've faced death a couple of times. I've been lucky...really lucky to still be here.

Now, I think the first thing I would do is try to fall in love with my maker. I want to leave here (this earth) fully aware and in love with who I'm going to spend eternity with...oh, yeah, I'd smoke one last cigarette too! I still linger by doorways that allow people to smoke outside the doors and I haven't had a ciggy in years++++++.
centralcacyclist
15 years ago
I tidy things up so the kids wouldn't have to deal with disorganized crap. And try to deal with my "affairs" as best I can for the same reason. And I'd say all the goodbyes I feel need to be said. I'd try to refrain from giving some people a last piece of my mind but no guarantees. ;) I'd try to feel gratitude for the good experiences and forgiveness for the not so good. I'd start drinking martinis at 4 pm and have an affair with a much younger man!
shaun
15 years ago
Yes Gina, hahahaha!! I just dont want anyone to think I'm a slob with my thongs all hung up on each other.
sands99
Original Author
15 years ago
Pam. I'm ok no worries. But BTDT that's why I asked.

I've been dead twice. First time when they didn't know I had a bleeding disorder. They took my tonsils out. They didn't know I had Von Willebrands, I hemmoraged they had to give me blood but I came back.
Terri_PacNW
15 years ago
I couldn't...My children still need me!
sands99
Original Author
15 years ago
Second time was when my appendix when from 0 to 60 when we were in the Poconos. My Appendix went nuts in one weekend and my family had a bad history moms appendix went shoelace and wound its way around her colon, my sisters appendix blew in one afternoon while I called 911, I only called for help because my dads appendix blew in his body and he had peritonitis for months with his torso wide open.

They took my appendix out and I did not do well. I hemorrhaged again and died on the table. They brought me back again with blood infusions. They hold it over my head whenever it suits them.

Maybe its why my mom is so on top of me all the time and why she thinks I'm so fragile.

I'm not as fragile any more its my turn to help her. I wish she would let me.

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