No one here will be able to find my registry at BB&B, as I registered under Kevin's name, and I'm pretty sure that no one here knows our last name. I decided to change the party invitation to say "Open House", which I think is not the same as "House Warming", and certainly does not have the connotations of gifts. So it's simply an "open house" party to orient my friends to where we live now, and it will be very casual. I've been very sick for the past three days with the flu and did not go to work on Tuesday and Wednesday. I had to go in Thursday morning for a half day, but did not have the strength to go today. I had thought about canceling the party altogether, but Kevin had already invited friends from where he works. I had no idea that BB&B had a separate website for California!! It is a very popular store here, and we've already bought a lot of stuff there, including our new stainless steel garbage can for the kitchen. We had to get a nice one because it's in a prominent area of the kitchen and visible from both the living room and dining room. For those of you unable to attend, Kevin will create a video that he will post on YouTube. As for comparing the cost of a wedding to the cost of a housewarming party - what about the expense of just getting into the house? And it is my first house. Suzie, I hope you do have a nice housewarming party, and I was in the same situation as you - I didn't think of having the party until people asked me when I was going to have it. As you can probably tell, I like to be accommodating to my friends, although at first I really didn't want to have the party, since it will take quite a bit of effort to get everything ready in time. However, Kevin said his friends were really anxious to see the house, and so I agreed to have it. I won't cancel the registry, but will keep it very private and only share it with those who ask for it. Some people are gift challenged and appreciate getting help. I do feel better now that I have sent the invitations as I did for the Open House and no mention of a registry. It didn't seem right to me from the beginning, but I really have no experience with this, since I've never been invited to a housewarming party and don't know what is expected or not expected. That's why I had to ask. It didn't seem right to me either when I was told that I should register, but having had no experience, I had nothing else to go on than what my friends here had told me. I think I'm on track now - thanks for all the help! Lars

I agree with the other posters. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but now you know why more people don't try to give 2 parties in the same day! Basically, you set yourself up for 10 solid hours (plus pre-2:00 prep) of hosting, clean-up, re-set-up, and hosting again. Who could do their best with that kind of challenge? In addition, even though you are experienced hosts, I think you took on quite a bit here -- entertaining 75 people, including clean up and set up in between, without any paid help -- well, I am sure you must have been exhausted; who wouldn't be? And when you are that tired, it is indeed a big deal to have people stay late. If you had only one party, with either a smaller number or some sort of help, I bet it wouldn't have seemed so overwhelming when people stayed late. I am not sure why you are so outraged that people arrived at 2:00 for a 2:00 party. I agree it's nice to give the guests a little cushion and come a few minutes late, but you really can't get mad or be surprised if someone arrives on the dot. Sometimes people have to leave early because of another commitment, so they come as early as they can. (I've had people show up 30-60 minutes EARLY -- how would you like that? Once I was just getting into the shower!) I also don't understand this at all: "Almost everyone else showed up between 3:30 and 4:30 (the event was supposed to end at 5:30)." What is wrong with that? You said it was an "'Open House' from 2 - 5." My confusion isn't whether it was 5 or 5:30, it's that I don't understand what is wrong with coming between 3:30 and 4:30 for a 2-5 (or 5:30) open house -- isn't the whole idea that people come and go within the time frame? 2:00 is too early, 3:30 is too late -- and this is "laid back"? Regarding people staying late for the evening party -- well, they were having fun, so good for you! It must have been a good party. But here again, I don't understand a few things. First you don't seem to like it that many guests didn't come until 10 -- but you didn't plan to feed them dinner (and evidently were clear about that on th invitation), so perhaps they went out to dinner first or something. People come on time for a dinner party, but they don't feel they must be there at the very beginning for a munchies "shindig" -- four hours seems like a lot for that. Regarding staying past midnight: few adult parties (other than open houses; see above) set end times. Even if you'd put it on the invitation, I bet some didn't remember or even notice it. I also don't understand why you were surprised or resentful that you were in the kitchen: you invited a LOT of people to your home, and you started running low on food, so you did what any good host does: you got something for them to eat. If that happens again, spare yourself the work while your guests are there, and order a few pizzas. But as Lindac says: the most important thing is whether your guests had a great time. And it sounds like they did!

We are going to host a "housewarming" BBQ when our place is done. We will probably call it "The Linoleum Palace Coming Out Ball" or something similar and cheeky. Most of the attendees will have attended our wedding 2 years ago and I doubt most will bring gifts beyond maybe some champagne or something, which is always welcomed! We entertain a LOT so I doubt people will treat it differently than most of our other larger parties. We will probably invite our GC/PM and architect as I can confidently say they've actually kind of become friends at this point! In regards to the explanation cards- I do think that's a bit pretentious, however I am planning a gallery wall for our entertainment room that includes the history of the house and some pre-construction photos. Our house is over 160 years old and we've found old photos of it from the 30s, newspaper clippings referencing it and some of the old inhabitants and have traced the property records all the way back to 1848 when the original farm was sold and cut up into residential lots. People usually have questions about the history of the house the first time they see it (it's quite dissimilar to most other houses in Brooklyn,) so I think that will actually be a nice talking piece. Plus, when someone asks "oh do you know anything about the history of the house?" I can just point them downstairs to the wall instead of retelling the story for the 50th time ;)

Love the welcome mat idea. Someone gave us a luxury shower head as a gift, which was a very nice out-of-the-box idea. If it were me I would up the home improvement store gift certificate amount and as my personalized gift I would give a great, funny kitchen towel that is unique to their interests. If it doesn't match their decor then at least you all will get an inexpensive laugh. Maybe I would wrap a tool or kitchen utensil in a funny kitchen towel. Or wrap the gift certificate in it. For the couple with kids I would look at the ikea web site and order some kind of toy storage thing or cool lights for their room or something. Or if they live near the beach maybe I would get some great kites for the family. My oldest just moved into his first house. My most popular gifts have been bed pillows (they went from one bedroom to three) and tools. A lot of the young people I know are pretty minimalist compared to people my age and they want to pick their own decor related things. If your friends have moved from a small space like a one bedroom apartment into a bigger house then there may be things they'd like that they don't own just because they didn't have the storage space before. If they live near the coast they may be interested in having more beach chairs, beach umbrellas, beach towels, etc. Or you could give them the gift certificate wrapped up cute when you get there and then while you're out there visiting buy something you see they need. Or buy something when you get back and ship it. There's just not a universally popular gift that works for everybody. I, myself, would hate decor items, picnic baskets, wine, beer, candles, trays, throws, fresh flowers, etc. But I always love the fact that my friends loved me and thought about me enough to bring me a gift, preferably an inexpensive gift. A sweet, kind note or a funny note ratchets a gift into the stratosphere. It truly is the thought that counts.