Yeah I agree with one poster about forgetting most of what you know about gardening, though not everything, but conditions are very very different here. Any plant that requires humidity (like tropicals)... forget it! The air can be so incredibly dry here that if you leave a cutting out without water even in the shade, the next day it will literally crumble to dust if you squeeze it in your hand. This means that crowding plants together can sometimes work to create a micro-climate that retains a bit more moisture. The sun up north is lower in the sky throught the day and the difference in day length between summer and winter is bigger. This affects what areas will be shaded and when. There is an awesome free 3D modeling software called "GOOGLE SKETCHUP". It's super easy to use and it has built in shadow modelling that is very accurate. You can for example create a rough model of the house and other things around it using the correct orientation. Then you can enter a location (Phoenix is close enough), and time of day, and it will show you exactly what areas will be shaded. You can then make it automatically change the time in one hour increments, that way you can tell throughout the day which areas are shaded and which ones get the most sun. Anything with exposure to the west in the afternoon will have to bear the hottest arizona sun. Personally I would think that planting a row of fairly tall trees on the west/SW side to provide afternoon shade would help whatever else grows in the rest of the yard. There is no such thing as too little sun in Arizona, and full shade is actually rare EVEN on the north side.. The sun is at a high angle (about 80 degrees) in the middle of the day. Google "Caliche"... we have plenty of it, along with hardpan. very very backbreaking work to dig through. If you dig a planting hole, do the water drainage test to see if the water will go down. If not you might have to dig through the caliche to create drainage chimneys. Arizona is a place of extremes. Just because it gets hot it doesn't mean it stays hot. Daily temp swings can be as much as 40 degrees. That means it could be 70 during the day and freeze at night in the winter. Ficus trees are beautiful but won't survive even a light frost (and they're water guzzlers). Look up the Sissoo tree. It likes lots of water but can do very well on low water once established. it's a beautiful shade tree that is almost litter free and fast growing. (I planted one 2 years ago and it grew from 6 ft to about 20 ft. Water deep and less often. In the summer I water trees about once a week, but leave the water running for a long time until there's a puddle and the water soaks deep. soil conditions: biggest problem is high ph. This can prevent uptake of iron and zinc especially in citrus. Chellated iron can help keep things green. Nitrogen dissapears fast when it's hot (citrus like a lot of nitrogen) Arizona has some pretty lax graywater laws. That means you can modify your plumbing to use some of your graywater for watering shade trees. You don't need a permit. My bathtub drains in my backyard around my trees. This goes a long way towards conserving water. ok this is more than 3 things, but I hope it helps.

Good idea on the winter sowing. I was stunned with my great results last year at growing all those perennials I could never grow or paid too much for. I even cut a delphinium bloom here in Missouri in November! My seed order should be here any day for winter sowing; however, for direct sowing, I enjoy cosmos and Benary's zinnias for many blooms in mid to late summer. I noticed that this site no longer has the history it used to have. I picked up many good ideas from some of those older posts. Teresa

One of the best things you can do for any plants is to start a compost bin or two in your yard. I had the worst sandy soil when we moved here. No earthworms or anything in it. I have been amending for 3 years-not the whole 4 acres, but just the flower beds and veggie garden. We have a bunch of chickens and rabbits etc. so we get quite a bit of compost going. Now all our beds are nice rich dark soil with lots of earthworms and other organic stuff in it. The plants are much happier too. I learned to vermicompost (worm compost) under our rabbit hutches so now I have nice worm compost to add as well. I add the worm compost to my potted plants and they really seem to respond well to it. My other tip is if you live in a humid climate, don't water stuff after 3 pm lol. That goes for all my plants here. Less fungal issues and less slugs.

While it's important to have some things in common, I think it's also important to have alone time or time with others and specifically time away from each other. I don't think it's healthy to be around each other 24/7 when you're not working. Bottom line, there should be a good balance. But I think what sushipup1 said above is THE #1 rule, spouse is #1, always. Even before children, because without that solid foundation of the husband and wife, children will suffer anyway.