Need help expressing my vision for exterior beams
HU-620539417
15 days ago
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housegal200
15 days agolast modified: 15 days agoHU-620539417
15 days agoRelated Discussions
Mom died, can't get vision out of my head
Comments (20)I cried reading everyone's responses. There is nothing like loosing your mother. I lost my mother on Feb 20th of this year and it was sudden but not unexpected as we knew were living on borrowed time, she suffered from COPD and congestive heart failure. We should have lost her in 2004 but she stayed with us till she had no reserve left, that is what the doc's call it when your lungs no longer have the capacity to store more oxygen. There is one thing I have learned that I would like to pass on and that is not to play the "what if" game with yourself. We can do that all day if we want but the end result is guilt because we create a scenario as we "Think" things may have turned out or may have been and no one knows or has a crystal ball to look back in time and say "yep had I done this or that things would have been better" Our mother's as stated in an earlier post really do not want their children to see them die. They are always thinking of us and I am sure they are thinking "I need to spare them this pain" and I have to say this. I was lucky enough to be with my mom when she took her last breath but that is an image I will never get out of my head. My mother's body once full of life, all of a sudden she was gone, it was the hardest thing I ever had to go through, to watch someone die in front of you is not something I ever want to see again, and yet, I am grateful I was able to be with her when she did pass. it sounds twisted I know, but it was just so truly sad to see her there one minute and then gone the next. Even though I spent 12 hours a day with her for 7 days before she died, I find myself thinking "I should have said or done more" but truly what else could I have said, or done. I sat next to her and held her hand, washed her face, stroked her head and face, massaged her arms and held her hand, kissed her face, made her laugh, shared moments with her, comforted her and gave her ice chips to suck on. I even bought her her favorite flower, a red rose. She smelled it, I brushed it against her cheek, she loved it. And all I did, I would catch myself and say, "if only I did more or said more" but I did not need to, and I remind myself of that all the time because that "What if" thought always pops into my head. Mother's know how much we love them, they see it in our eyes and we see how much they love us in their eyes. The sweetest thing my mother gave me was the look. She and I while I was drawing pictures of she and I when I was a little girl holding her hand, she looked at me and for 6 seconds we just stared at each other and I saw the most amazing amount of love she had for me, and we did not say a word but we smiled and cried and she said "I love you" and I know I will never experience anyone looking at me the way she did. Playing the "what if" game will just make you go nuts, I am sure our mother's knew how much we loved them, they could feel us even when we were not with them, and I am positive they did not want us to see them die, God controls everything for his own purpose and reasoning. And no matter what we may have felt we did wrong, or did not do enough of before our mother's passed, I for sure can say this, as they are in the presence of the Lord, all earthly things are passed and they are not thinking about what we did or did not do and they are for sure not judging us. There is one big party in heaven, a celebration for each child who comes home to be with the Lord, as the Lord knows our hearts, I am sure our mother's knew our hearts and knew we loved them. We are only human, not perfect, and we did the best we could and our mother's loved and love us no matter what. If you think they died alone I can honestly say that I truly believe when someone dies they are never alone, an angle is there to take them to heaven and my mom kept looking around the room before she passed as she said she heard strange sounds and wanted to know where they were coming from and she was so peaceful. I believe she heard the trumpet sounds being made for her entry into heaven. The bible says when we die, those who know the Lord are in his presence and all worries and pain and sadness are no longer. I hope this provides some comfort, just don't beat yourselves up about what you could have done or said. Our mother's know how much we loved them and all we wanted to say and do. God bless...See MoreNeed some SERIOUS help with my exterior... disaster.
Comments (56)Like the idea of some third party coming over and pointing out some deficiencies and then just "ask what s/he meant by that" and that s/he was fairly adamant that these subs were not doing your build justice. By focusing on the subs, you can give MIL an out. How active is she at the site? Is it possible that she's simply not seen this? or is this a new crew from her usual folks, etc? Is your bank giving you draws? is their inspector someone that you can work with? or your banker? I have a good relationship with the inspector that is working for my bank. If he holds up a draw because the work isn't done (or is done VERY WRONG) things will get real and you'll HAVE TO address them - or else no one gets any money. That might be the most direct way. You have to address these - if you don't - even for the sake of "family peace" - it will rot your relationship like the water intrusion will rot your house....See MoreMy Dated Home Exterior Needs Help!
Comments (12)Yeah, that car/garage/driveway is unfortunate. That’s all I can see. I can’t tell if there’s room to the right to move the driveway over. If there is, you could remove the pavement that goes right up to the French doors. All your windows/trim should match INCLUDING the French doors. Definitely remove the lights at the French doors. That just says “driveway.” Overall it looks like a charming well-kept little home....See MoreI need help w/beam placement and to paint or not paint fireplace brick
Comments (13)Rachel - thank you - you shared great photos - I will post pictures next week after the walls and trim are painted in Dove White. I really like that black paint idea on fireplace- such a bold move but I love the white fireplaces you show which seem safer. Black happens to be in the wallpaper I am currently hanging in the foyer today. Pics attached. Changing trim and walls white all over the house is a huge transformation from my dingy dark trim and walls and I am creating a monster that is snowballing. The dining room rug looks horrible with my wallpaper so I am now in search of a new rug there and one for the family room and now I need new furniture in there as well. Suggestions are welcome from anyone - It is painted Dove white and you can see the new foyer paper with the new blue study. What about a blue or green velvet sofa with all white room. I have 2 cats and someone said that they are not as attracted to velvet. I am not painting the built-ins around fireplace just yet because I have not picked out kitchen cabinets. Maybe I can have the built-ins sprayed white or the blue??? I could also try to change the trim or molding to make them more modern and even wonder if wood shelves would look good to match my dream beams. Ripping out the built-ins and replacing will be costly unless I find some cool furniture pieces to go there. I will also hold off on the painting the fireplace so I can see what the brick looks with an all white room. My painters love me and they come back every two weeks for my next Phase of renovation. : )...See Morekandrewspa
15 days agoHALLETT & Co.
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14 days agoPatricia Colwell Consulting
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14 days agolast modified: 14 days agoNorwood Architects
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