A young man goes into a drugstore to buy cOndoms. The pharmacist tells him they come in packs of 3, 9, or 12 and asks which he'd like. "Well," the young man says, "I've been seeing this girl for a while, and she's really hot. I think tonight's the night. We're having dinner with her parents, then we're going out afterward. I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky... and once she's had me, she'll want me all the time. Better give me the 12-pack." So he buys the cOndoms and leaves. Later that evening, he's sitting at dinner with the girl and her parents. He asks if he can say the blessing and they agree. He starts praying... and keeps praying..and praying... for several minutes. Finally, the girl leans over and whispers, "You never told me you were such a religious person." He whispers back, "You never told me your father was a pharmacist."

During class one day, a teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question: "Joe, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" Joe said, "Just a minute, I have to go pee." The teacher responded, "That would be rude and impolite." "What about you, Mark? How would you say it?" Mark said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back." "That's better," said the teacher, "but it's still not very nice to say the word 'bathroom' at the dinner table." "And you, Little Johnny... can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?" Johnny said, "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner." The teacher fainted.

Male patient said, "Doctor, my girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the cond*m never broke. How is it possible?" The doctor replied, "Let me tell you a story. There once was a hunter who always carried a gun wherever he went. One day he took his umbrella instead of his gun when he went out. A lion suddenly jumped in front of him. In order to scare the lion, the hunter used the umbrella like a gun, shot the lion and it died!" Male patient said, "Nonsense! Someone else must have shot the lion. The doctor replied, "Good! You understood the story. Next patient, please."

Here's an oldie! The one above from @roxsolid made me think of it. A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked in to blood donation clinic. The nursed asked the rabbit: "What is your blood type?" "I am probably a type O" said the rabbit.