By now, I'd lost ALL interest. The show was a trainwreck. I did like seeing Costa Rica, just not the couple visiting it. :0)

Foas, could not agree more. Although I only watched bits and pieces of it, I found him to be very creepy. All that blubbering.

My elderly mom used to do the mouthing your words thing. It drove me nuts. I wonder if its an early sign of dementia. Run, Theresa, run.

I found it creepy that she said she had written her vows. Who does something like that?

It's the nature of the show that someone is going to get hurt. I think it hit even more deeply because of the age factor.

Daily Mail bias and credibility

I’m well aware of Daily Mail’s reputation but I’ve also often seen them to be early and credible on this sort of thing. It would be a heck of a stretch to report on a long term girlfriend if one didn’t exist. If all the rest is fabricated or exaggerated, her existence alone would shatter his credibility.

While writing vows before proposal seems weird, I’d think of it more as overexcited than creepy. Sadly she does come across as damaged goods (I don’t know how much about this came out during the series) and while I feel for her, I’d also understand why someone might shy away from that. No need to contribute to the damage though.

dedtired - Interesting about your mom. The thought of early dementia crossed my mind as well.

I still haven't watched. I'll see it today.

It's actually The Hollywood Reporter who exposed his past. They appear to have vetted the former girlfriend's account of their relationship.

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-features/golden-bachelor-gerry-turner-ex-girlfriend-speaks-out-1235683869/

Wow.

Very odd to not be straight forward when its easy to fact check.

At least Theresa doesn’t have skeletons.

While Gerry explained how he went about things with Leslie and apologized, I still think he should never used the word love to either woman.

I do think this show has a place which is why it became so successful.

Eld, I guess it all depends on how much detail is necessary for some. He apparently shared that he had dated, but never formed a successful relationship. I'm sure there's truth and fabrication from all involved.

https://people.com/golden-bachelor-gerry-turner-discusses-dating-failures-after-wife-toni-death-exclusive-8407982

Wow! I must shamefully admit I did watch the shows. I found him to be an attractive, attentive man of 72 but reading the above story, he is a con man. I wonder if when Teresa reads it, she'll still marry him in the big TV wedding?

Lily, I think it’s the show that decides how to present. Personally I wouldn’t want to be misrepresented in my career. I think he might have quickly mentioned dating, but I think he wanted to show that he hadn’t found an equal love.

Why would you call him a con man?

I thought he seemed like a good guy, but a little too buttoned up for my taste. Proclamations of love by all parties seemed premature and unwise. From the beginning, Theresa gave me bad vibes, so I was disappointed he chose her, but they both look happy so I hope it works out for them.

I called him a con man because I heard him say he had not been with anyone or kissed anyone since his wife died seven years ago. He in fact lived with a woman and started dating two months after his wife died. More than one woman.

After reading these comments, this article from The Hollywood Reporter popped up in the articles my browser highlights:

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-features/golden-bachelor-gerry-turner-ex-girlfriend-speaks-out-1235683869/

It's the article cited as the source for FOAS's link in the OP.

This seems to sum it up:

"But even in this Golden variation, this is, at bottom, a reality show, a genre mostly known for its frequent disconnection with reality."

I don't watch reality shows - never watched The Bachelor - but I'd have to be living in a cave not be aware of the buzz around its latest season. My impression of the guy from the start was that he seemed creepy, but most everyone in many of the reality shows seems a bit off to me.

The disconnect between his personal history on TV vs. in real life is remarkable.

I agree. Why did he have to lie about past dating?

While I don’t necessarily find him creepy, all those speeches seemed scripted.

I called him a con man because I heard him say he had not been with anyone or kissed anyone since his wife died seven years ago

Not what he said.

The reality TV leading man tried online dating — to little success — after the death of his wife Toni in 2017.

“I've dated a number of times since Toni's passed, more recently than back closer to when she's passed,” Turner, 72, previously told PEOPLE. “For one reason or another, the attempts didn't work out. I could give you a wide range of reasons, but it doesn't really matter.”

https://people.com/golden-bachelor-gerry-turner-discusses-dating-failures-after-wife-toni-death-exclusive-8407982

The Hollywood Reporter article refutes that, I think...

He calls it dating, which insinuates a few dinners out, but he actually lived with "Carolyn" from summer 2018 to early 2020.

I haven't watched the show but I've read a few articles along the way and one of the questions was whether the final 2-3 would be willing to relocate or whether he'd be willing to. Did he say on the finale where they'll live after the wedding? If he is indeed a control freak, he will insist that Leslie move to his home.

Actually I just saw that they’re both packing up and heading to SC.

I hadn’t watched the whole episode until now and even though I liked Leslie better than Theresa, I think he dodged a bullet by not choosing her. Her whole issue in not being the one seemed to be weighted by her history of never being chosen. Her sadness seemed more about that than actually losing Gerry and what that relationship meant to her. Not a mentally healthy respnse to me.

I wonder if there will be Golden Bachortette since apparently this was a rating success. I agree that Leslie would be the first choice but she does have a lot of baggage some of the other women don't. Gerry is an attractive man for 72 and his one daughter looks just like him. I liked him a lot until I read the after-story.

Oly, I agree. Leslie seemed so needy. She would be too high maintenance at this stage.

Lily, yes. Disappointing that there is a back story.

Gerry and Theresa are making rounds with interviews. I wonder if they are enjoying all the attention.

I also wonder if they are being styled for all their appearances.

I also wonder if they are being

Seems like Gerry has some baggage of his own...

I watched Katie Couric’s interview.

Here is my take on Gerry. The franchise wanted to present him in a certain light. I don't understand why he ciuldn’t say he had a relationship. Who cares?

It could be worse. He obviously told all to Theresa.

They are both enjoying the hoopla and all the perks that have come and will come.

Freed wedding, free honeymoon, free very expensive diamond ring.

And as Gerry pointed out, the process was fun. Helicopter tides, trip to a luxury resort in Costa Rica. Things he admittedly said he could never afford.

Katie asked if certain things were scripted encouraged. They curved around that.

Of course the franchise needed some drama!

Calling Gerry a restaurateur was obviously the franchise.

Interesting how people look for the dirt.

And, the ex girlfriend, either come out and speak or let it go. What good would come of all this.

Not sure if you noticed your typos, eld, but 'hineymoon' made me chuckle 😄

And the live-in girlfriend did speak out:

"...Carolyn became friends with Gerry at the mental health community in Davenport, where he was beloved by co-workers and patients alike. (Apparently, he was great at conflict resolution.) Carolyn and the staff threw him a retirement party when he left to move to the lake with Toni.

“Then, we get the shocking news that Toni passed away, so most everyone at the office went to the visitation in July,” said Carolyn.

“Then, in August, I got a phone call from Gerry,” she said. “I was so shocked to hear from him.”

On that call, Gerry said he was coming to Davenport to work on his wife’s estate and asked whether Carolyn could help him with donating Toni’s corporate wardrobe to Dress for Success.

She was happy to help. Gerry took her to dinner after as a thank you.

“The idea that I’d go out with a recent widower just mortifies me,” Carolyn now says. “I just really didn’t see it. Until I went back and looked at my text messages, I never realized Gerry’s texts had turned hot and heavy so relatively soon.”

Indeed, an eager and self-deprecating Gerry joked while texting, “I got LUCKY when you first said you would go to dinner with me two weeks ago. I mean how often does an old geezer get the beautiful girl?”

Soon thereafter, Gerry texted: “You are the right woman for me. No need to look further.”

Gerry persisted in asking her to move in with him at the lake house for almost a year before Carolyn would even consider it.

Eventually, Carolyn fell hard, driving five hours to spend what she remembers as blissful weekends with Gerry at his dream house on Big Long Lake.

After a year of such weekends, she finally agreed to move in with him. But before she gave up her settled life in Iowa, she says, Gerry promised her elderly mom that he intended eventually to marry Carolyn.

She tells THR that he suggested she quit her job and get a new one near the lake house. This proved impossible, since it’s “in the middle of nowhere,” as she put it, but she did get an accounting job with a company in Fort Wayne, nearly an hour’s commute each way.

She arrived the last weekend of July 2018. (THR has viewed mail that was sent to her at his house, and a background check listed his address as her primary residence for that period.) Then, the surprises started. Gerry told Carolyn that her share of the expenses would be about $1,000 a month, which Carolyn negotiated down to $850. They would go Dutch on all meals except on special occasions, she remembers him telling her. At restaurants, Carolyn paid her half in advance, and then when the check came, Gerry paid the whole tab, like the big man.

They agreed Gerry was fastidious about cleanliness. In the mornings, she says, Gerry insisted that Carolyn make the bed before she come upstairs for breakfast.

But Carolyn’s Big Long Lake idyll with Gerry was about to end.

She was packing for Gerry’s high school reunion, set to take place in October 2019. “I’m not taking you to the reunion looking like that,” Carolyn recalls him saying as he pointed to her body. She’d put on 10 pounds — from stress, she says — but certainly wasn’t fat.

The disinvitation led to the breakup. Gerry told Carolyn to be out by Jan. 1, 2020. He volunteered to cover the cost of her U-Haul as long as she paid the vendor, and he reimbursed her.

She spent her first packing day alone while Gerry was out. She says she was so frazzled that she fell down the stairs, requiring a trip to the ER and foot surgery the following day — as confirmed by a hospital bill viewed by THR. Gerry arrived home that night, and — as Carolyn recalls — accused her of using the fall as an excuse to prolong her stay and suggested that she was planning to sue him for causing the injury.

In the end, she says, he refused to allow Carolyn to stay in their love nest during the final week of the two weeks’ notice she was required to give her boss before leaving her job. He told her to go to a hotel.

It was the dead of winter, and Carolyn struggled to get to her car in her walker, Gerry at her side, as she recalls. She might have been any one of the roseless Golden Bachelorettes, told by a suddenly somber Jesse Palmer to “take a minute and gather your things.”

“I really wish this would’ve worked out,” she remembers him telling her. “Call me when you get to your hotel, so I know you made it safe.” ..."

Interesting how people look for the dirt.

Expected. He opted to go on a national TV franchise to be presented as some sort of great catch, to be wooed by a houseload of women vying to prove their worthiness. I think it would be interesting if people were NOT digging below the surface. To find stuff like, perhaps, that this long-grieving widower was out there dating within no time. Life is short so far be it from me to say when someone can start dating, but you get what you get when you try to deceive the nation.

I read somewhere that his lip moving while listening is often done by those with hearing aids. They do it in attempts to process and better understand what is being heard. I had an employee repeat what was being said and was told that was a sign of ADD.

Interesting how people look for the dirt.

As if everyone else has nothing to hide. 🙄

More from The Hollywood Reporter article I linked, in case anyone didn't read it:

"...Carolyn apparently wasn’t the only relationship he and the Golden Bachelor producers failed to mention. This fall, a reporter from the U.S. Sun reached out to Heather, a waitress at The Shady Nook, a bar and restaurant located on the lake in Hudson, Indiana, next door to Gerry’s new lake house, so close that he’d essentially made it his bachelor clubhouse.

Heather Lanning-Adams, who no longer works at the Shady Nook, considered Gerry her friend. She told the reporter that in the past six years, “He dated a couple of women. They weren’t all long-term, but they … weren’t short-term either. … He was with a couple of women for a decent amount of time, but it just didn’t work out.”

Carolyn, meanwhile, didn’t want the years of her life as the Golden Bachelor’s girlfriend to become national news fodder. But neither did she want to be the “invisible woman,” whispered about in Davenport as the gullible gal Gerry duped and then dumped.

“I just can’t believe this has happened to my girlfriend,” said Susan McCreary, a close friend of Carolyn’s.

“When Carolyn and Gerry first started dating [in September 2017], my husband and I took them to an Iowa [Hawkeyes] football game,” Susan said. “I thought, ‘This guy’s legit. This guy’s a really good guy for her.’”

McCreary recalled watching the show and hearing Gerry say that line about not having been kissed in six years. “And I’m like, what? He’s got to know that people are paying attention to this show. I’m just flabbergasted.”..."

He didn't deny having other relationships.

“I've dated a number of times since Toni's passed, more recently than back closer to when she's passed,” Turner, 72, previously told PEOPLE. “For one reason or another, the attempts didn't work out. I could give you a wide range of reasons, but it doesn't really matter.”

https://people.com/golden-bachelor-gerry-turner-discusses-dating-failures-after-wife-toni-death-exclusive-8407982

I see a big difference between dating a few times and living with someone for a year and a half. He could've and should've said he had one long-term relationship, but then that would mean that he had a second chance at love and failed. Maybe that didn't fit the story they wanted to tell for the show.

Maybe that's not how he viewed the relationship. We've only heard one person's version of the story.

I still say it is the show’s doing. They need to be more transparent. Fact checking has become too easy.

Correction: it's not just one person's version. There are a number of other people who corroborated the details, and there are also public records that show his employment history.

Right. Again I think it is the show’s doing. He explained his employment history. And, i’m sure he was told to not go into previous relationships in detail.

For me, that was worse than his fanaglwd employment history.

I think it bears repeating that it's certainly no surprise the show is highly orchestrated - as are the majority of so-called reality TV shows. I'm pretty sure that producers expected the real backstory to emerge sooner or later, and it's probably not a bad thing to their way of thinking.

In fact, I would not be surprised if someone connected to the show aided reporters in investigating.

"Turner, like so many “Bachelor” stars before him, turned out to be not quite as perfect as producers led us all to believe. A day before the finale aired on ABC, the Hollywood Reporter published a story suggesting his reality TV portrayal was deceptively positive. Rather than mourning his wife and living as a monk since her death in 2017, the report alleged, he had dated and lived with another woman for more than a year. He also treated her shabbily, according to THR, criticizing her weight and making her split the check in advance on dates.

That “The Bachelor” put such a positive spin on Turner should be surprising to no one who is even remotely familiar with the show, which has a long tradition of propping up handsome if unremarkable (and occasionally downright awful) guys and portraying them as irresistible, impossibly perfect dreamboats. Nor is Turner exceptionally caddish for telling more than one woman he was in love with them — something that has become increasingly common in recent seasons of “The Bachelor.”"

https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/tv/story/2023-12-01/golden-bachelor-finale-gerry-turner-leslie

that whole "waa waa waa i'm in love with TWO women, oh what to do what to do??" while wringing his hands and blubbering like somebody took the last cookie on the plate that HE wanted just rings so hollow. get a grip, already. 🙄

I did not watch any of this Golden Bachelor except for about a hot minute early on. Gag!

However, I was just reading an article about how he misrepresented himself regarding a previous love-life after his wife passed away. That’s not the point here. The article mentioned where he and his wife built their retirement home at Big Long Lake in Indiana. It sounded so familiar, and it is! DH’s cousin and his SO live there on the lake! We visited them a coiple of summers ago, had a lovely lunch, they gave us a boat ride around the lake, and we later took them out to dinner. We were staying in DH’s home town which is about 1.5 hours away in Ohio. It’s a very nice, small area. I just thought, what a weird coincidence. And now I’m wondering if they know him. 🤷🏻‍♀️

The house was built in 2007. He purchased it in 2017.

I'm from nearby FW. One of my uncles had a summer cottage there and one of his sons had a house and lived there year round until moving to another lake to build.